Textual Overtones

Moving!

2008-01-07T19:42:00.000+05:30

Hic! Wish you all a very happy happy new year... Hic!

Also, just to let you all know that this will be the last post on this blog. I've moved to Wordpress and have got myself a domain name finally.

So do make a note in change of web address. It's easy to remember: sudhishkamath dot com

This also means you no longer need to keep track of my 3 or 4 blogs from different addresses. Have brought all posts under one roof. Tagging reviews, interviews, columns and general updates while take a while though but you should be able to find all posts in the new blog.

See you there.

Hindi Cinema: My top five of 2007

2007-12-30T07:55:00.000+05:30

I started off trying to make a top five list with over 15 movies that seemed to deserve a slot.

So I extended it to make it my top 15, only to find more movies that seemed to deserve a place in the top 15.

So all you Hindi movie buffs, head here for the results.

Taare Zameen Par!

2007-12-23T03:50:00.000+05:30

Just posted my review. Taare Zameen Par is the movie of the year.

Fell in love with the movie within the first 10 minutes. Please make sure every parent you know watches this movie. Refreshingly full of life.

Also, in case you haven't yet voted for Sivaji as CNN-IBN's Movie of the Year, please do so now by clicking here.

Yes, I know Chak De is a great film. And I might have even voted for Taare Zameen Par if it was nominated but Sivaji is closer home. And Superstar deserves to stay on the top of any list. So spread the word and Vote for Superstar.

Webcast: A chat with Madhavan

2007-12-04T04:33:00.000+05:30

You need 35 minutes to listen to the whole webcast. Do take time out to listen to R.Madhavan (yeah, Maddy) speaking his heart out in his most candid interview ever.

I started out quite formally because we were shooting it for a TV interview but as we got into it, I think we both forgot the camera was rolling. I recorded the audio from my phone and compressed the file size to one-tenths of the original for the podcast.

Do spread the word about the movie. Don't miss it because it's not everyday we get a film made like this in Tamil.

Do listen to the webcast for my review of the film. I have shared my views on the film with him during the chat at his place. We recorded this two weeks ago. And for the record, the last 15 minutes of the chat was completely off camera.

Raja Sen's remake of Saawariya!

2007-11-30T23:49:00.000+05:30

Actually, it's a no-budget retake of 'White Nights'.

My favourite Rediff critic comes up with a much-entertaining 2-minute version. Enjoy.

And please leave your comments on the filmmaker's blog. Will save him the effort of coming here every time to check response.

I've always wanted to make a 2-minute take on Jism. Never found volunteers for Bipasha though! :D

Na Ja! Bach Le!

2007-11-30T23:32:00.000+05:30

Just posted a quick take on the much-awaited Madhuri Dixit comeback film.

In case you missed dropping in last week, there's a review of Dhan Dhana Dhan Goal there too.

Watch out for the podcast: an interview with Madhavan on Evano Oruvan. Coming up on Sunday. Watch this space.

The film releases on December 7.

Live from ShankarEhsaanLoy concert

2007-11-17T21:57:00.000+05:30

Not sure if mobile blogging works with video. Test post.

Evano Oruvan Premiere

2007-11-14T23:07:00.000+05:30

Just watched Madhavans Evano Oruvan at a fund raiser premiere. Blew my mind. After Anbe Sivam, finally a movie that is World class. Hits you right at the gut. Middle class angst has never looked more real before. Absolutely gripping. Riveting. Disturbingly good. The movie to recommend. Its a remake me the much acclaimed Dombivli Fast. Sending this from my phone from the theatre. More later.

Sania in town

2007-11-14T17:51:00.000+05:30

Posting this from my mobile right from the scene of action at Taj Coromandel. The tennis sensation who turns 21 tomorrow was mobbed by photographers. Watch out for the Sania Interview tomorrow on Metro Plus.

First test post

2007-11-13T06:02:00.000+05:30

N95, The Office, Prison Break, Om Shanti Om and Saawariya

2007-11-11T05:59:00.000+05:30

Long time since I posted anything personal. So here goes.

Finally picked up an N95 over an iPhone (which certainly looks way better but there's the threat of them turning into iBricks and that's a risk I'm not taking) but I like n95's functionality.

Now I can just send my stories and photographs (n95 has a 5 mega pixel camera) from anywhere as long as I have the network, without my Apple Powerbook.

This way, I have more time to spend away from the office. Speaking of which, I caught most of the episodes of The Office at the 3 a.m. slot on TV daily thanks to the season 2 re-run on Star World. Yet to see the UK version but I love the US version.

Anybody's who has worked in an office environment would know people like these characters.

That's also one of the reasons I don't like to stay in the office much.

It's ironic that people who spend more time at the office, especially journalists, believe that they do more work by just staying at the office.

Or maybe because I watch movies and write about them, they don't consider it work. Lucky for them, I don't consider it work either.

Now that the worst possible twist has already happened in Prison Break season 3, things can only get better from here. Recently watched episode 6 and 7 back to back and I can't wait to download 8 after it plays on Monday in the US.

In spite of its nonsense plot, Prison Break still manages to keep you hooked with its thrills. I hated season 2 but decided to give 3 a shot because it returned to its core premise of the impossible jail break. And the new prison Sona is quite exciting too. I like the new inmates and the power play between them and the old ones but I seriously hope they don't keep changing villains all the time.

Finally, caught up with a Tamil film. Suriya was the only guy not doing this but he's fallen for the camera-below-the-crotch image build-up trap too in Vel.

Think the twins separated at birth plot is timeless? You will probably enjoy Vel that has nothing but Suriya's sincerity to boast of. I won't be surprised if it's a big hit in the villages.

Also watched Om Shanti Om and Saawariya. But you have to read my movie blog for my reviews.

No Smoking: The only bad movie I would strongly recommend you watch

2007-10-28T01:09:00.000+05:30

No Smoking is undeniably a bad movie.

But it still needs to be seen. Simply because it is one of those rare Indian films that have tried to walk this path, and probably the first to do it mainstream. With a mainstream Hindi star like John Abraham in the lead.

Anurag, here's saluting the guts, the courage and the spirit.

Having done my good deed for the day, here's my detailed review.

I didn't think much of Eli Roth until I read this...

2007-10-23T04:50:00.000+05:30

"Failure, in my book, is someone who lives in the safety of their laptop taking shots at those who actually achieved what they have been unable to do."

That's one of Eli Roth's personal quotes, thanks to IMDB.

Recently saw Hostel 2. If Hostel gave me the creeps, Hostel 2 made me laugh.

Hostel 2 has to be the grossest movie ever made! I have to confess though... I didn't exactly hate it! :D

Ranvir, Vinay aur That Four Letter Word

2007-10-20T19:58:00.000+05:30

This happens to be our most fun experience on national television and the most embarassing one. The talk show with Ranvir and Vinay was a blast. It was recorded on the same day as the India-Pakistan T20 final.

Cary and me were in the dressing room watching the last two overs of the match before the show trying not to get stressed out by the fact that we hardly spoke Hindi, only to get all the more stressed by that high-tension thriller...

As the Pakistanis needed 13 of the last over, the entire crew of Ranvir Vinay aur Kaun including the hosts stormed into the green room. And you can imagine the excitement.

Even the normally cricket-indifferent Cary was all hooked to it and Ranvir turned cynical after the six. But soon Misbah hit the shot he will never ever try again all his life as Sreesanth caught it and the room erupted with screams and celebrations...

What a way to start the shoot...

Yes, it was a sentimental shoot for Cary, Ranvir and me because Ranvir had been part of the film since 2002 ever since I met him and Cary for an interview when they were both VJs. We had come a full circle and now Ranvir was interviewing us.

Truly an honour!

Thank you Ranvir Paaji and Vinay... You made us feel at home and never have we enjoyed digs at us more!

And thanks Darshan, for being the official TFLW TV show tracker/recorder.

That Four Letter Word on [V]

2007-10-20T16:29:00.000+05:30

Thank you, Channel [V] for supporting us and giving us as much visibility as any mainstream film.

Just out: Reviews of Bhool Bhulaiyaa, Laaga Chunari, etc.

2007-10-19T05:11:00.000+05:30

Just found time to post online my reviews of Bhool Bhulaiyaa, Laaga Chunari Mein Daag and Licence to Wed, Wrong Turn and Resident Evil 3: Extinction.

You check out these reviews and more on my movie blog.

CNN-IBN: That Four Letter Word in Mumbai

2007-10-11T02:42:00.000+05:30

CNN-IBN and Rajeev Masand were quite sweet to us by covering the release of the film at Fun Cinemas. Rajeev also called me to their studios for a quick chat on independent cinema. Take a look. And thank you, Varsha! :)

Return of the Jewel Thief

2007-10-11T01:48:00.000+05:30

Vijay Anand has a worthy successor.

Sriram Raghavan, the brains behind the dark taut thriller Ek Hasina Thi and the phenomenally acclaimed ‘Johnny Gaddaar’ quoting Tarantino (“I steal from every film”) recently in an article went on to give a complete list of his ‘Reservoir Gods,’ ranging from John Huston’s ‘The Asphalt Jungle’ to Kubrick’s ‘The Killing’ to Jules Dassin’s ‘Rififi’ to the modern day interpreters of the genre: Coen Brothers and Tarantino to Vijay Anand’s suspense-filled thrillers (‘Teesri Manzil,’ ‘Jewel Thief,’ ‘Johnny Mera Naam’) to Jyoti Swaroop’s ‘Parwana,’ and ended it on a note saying: “I hope I have managed to steal something from them.”

The master thief did. And so smoothly that you would find nothing unoriginal about ‘Johnny Gaddaar,’ one of the best homage films ever made. (Read my review of the film here.)

Not every filmmaker exposes his influences to critics who are just waiting to spot the reference.

In a detailed exclusive interview over email, Raghavan explains:

“When I wrote the piece about the movies that influenced and inspired me, it was not some sort of confession. The movies I listed are great films, by great directors. When I began Johnny Gaddaar, I wanted to imbibe some of the qualities that made those films so rich and layered. My plot is not based on any of the films. Of course, the genre will have some elements in common. Femme fatales, corrupt cops, double crossers, infidelity and so on.

Likewise every film set in a jail like Ek Hasina Thi will have common elements. Shawshank Redemption, Midnight Express, Escape from Alcatraz, Birdman of Alcatraz, The Great Escape, Lock up, Double Jeopardy are all such different films. But they will have at least half dozen common situations.

I see a fairly THICK line between homage, inspiration and plagiarism. I mean, what’s the point of copying a scene ditto…where’s the fun and challenge in it.”

Unfortunately, for Raghavan, the film did not have the best of openings and the film couldn’t stay on till the word of mouth spread. ‘Johnny Gaddaar’ averaged three and a half stars on five from over a dozen reviews around the country but the box office can be cruel.

What went wrong?

“Jaideep Sahni asked one ticket seller in a hall, how is the picture? He had an interesting answer. He said, picture zabardast hai, audience bekar hai.

But, I wont blame the audiences. Why would anyone risk paying 150-200 rupees on a weekend to see a film with a new actor? Unless…they know it’s a damn good film. I would have loved it but I did not expect a huge opening for the film. I was confident that those who saw it would like it and spread the word. That’s exactly what is happening. But the press has been extremely positive and so too various people in the film fraternity. The word of mouth is strong and the second weekend collections are better than the first.

Also most movies made today expect the viewer to leave his brains at home. Johnny demands the viewer pay attention. That’s the way I like to watch thrillers, all movies actually.

I do feel we should have had some innovative marketing strategy. We did promote the film to our best but certain movies need strong marketing ideas. Hitchcock announced during the release of Pyscho that no viewer would be allowed in the hall once the movie began. Also he had an ambulance outside every theatre in case someone got a heart attack. These gimmicks create curiousity and then if the film is good too, there’s no stopping it. Pyscho was his most inexpensive film but his biggest hit.”

We decide to let him refute a little criticism that he’s got from critics around the country. That the police is near absent during the proceedings. That you have "over-written" and "over-directed" the film. That it is the first comprehensive spot the movie reference exercise.

“Ok….one by one. The lead characters are shrewd criminals so they’d definitely ensure that their misdeeds don’t attract the police. In fact one of the main characters is a corrupt cop!! I could have shown cops doing some sundry investigations but it’s not relevant to my story. The story takes place over just 2-3 days and I’m sure the cops would get into the picture once they find the bodies…but by then, the movie is over.

I don’t understand what over written and over directed mean. Need examples to answer that. Really. I can understand over acting. Or over dose of violence..but how can you overwrite a film. Do the critics mean it’s too verbose? Or have I taken strange angles and bizarre show off kind of shots?

Spot the references….Well…I feel the references are vital to the movie’s screenplay. I mean the various clips I’ve shown are carrying the plot of Johnny Gaddaar forward. The lead guy gets his caper idea from an old Amitabh Bachchan movie. The characters speak about movies like Scarface and Black…but why not? Don’t we all refer to movies in our day to day conversations. People have love it. It’s all meant for fun…and offsets the dark and nasty things that happen in the movie.”

Raghavan’s finest quality as a filmmaker is how he observes and learns techniques from the films he watches.

The characterisation in Johnny Gaddaar would make you believe it was a script the Coen Brothers wrote. Is that what he stole from them – the art of creating memorably real characters?

“I love the Coen Brothers work. My favourites are Millers Crossing, Blood Simple and Fargo. Fargo has a pregnant cop in charge of the investigation. It was not necessary to the script but it lends the character an emotional reality and quirky appeal. Nine out of ten heroines in India would throw me out if I suggested such a thing to them. But Francis McDormand did a super job and even won an Oscar for the performance. While making Johnny, I and my writers kept brainstorming on how to make the characters somewhat real so that they connect with viewers even though they are racketeers. Also I must thank my actors who brought their own inputs and experiences to give shades to the roles that were not so fleshed out in the script.”

We then talk a little about the fantastic score that was nostalgic enough to give us the goose-bumps.The title sequence was pure nostalgia for the Hindi film freak.

“All credit for the soundtrack goes to Shankar Ehsaan Loy and my background music composer Daniel George. Actually we had no scope for conventional songs in the movie. And yet I love music and wanted a lot of music in the film. So we asked SEL to do a title song which we could use in a crucial scene as background. I loved the song so much that I persuaded them to take time out and compose two more numbers. They are used very briefly in the film and to really enjoy it, you got to listen to the CD. It’s an eclectic album.”

And then, he belts out the references of his learning again:

“A good thriller needs a terrific background score. Imagine Pyscho or Taxi Driver without Bernard Hermann’s tracks. Or Untouchables without Ennio Morricone.

The JG score has been composed by Daniel B George. We have done some experimenting here…. The BG score was majorly conceived on live performances and recorded on an analog machine. We tried to stay away from the digital environment which is in right now.

The tympanis, brass, violins were all recorded live. The approach has actually been to record music like it was done back in the 70s. It was a long and arduous and comparatively expensive process but the quality will be discernible to the audience.

I thoroughly enjoyed the experience and had the privilege to work with musicians like Franco Vaz, who’ve actually played for RD Burman, Kalyanji Anandji and other greats.”

His next project with Saif Ali Khan, Agent Vinod sounds like another throwback to a bygone era. Is that another homage film?

“Agent Vinod is a realistic thriller set in the world of current day espionage. The script is still being honed so it’s too early to speak about the plot etc. But it’s not like the James Bond spoofs that Hindi movies had successfully attempted. I mean, it’s not Farz or Suraksha or even the Rajshri production Agent Vinod starring Mahendra Sandhu.

We will have no scene like the Chief of Intelligence hears about some disaster and says Call Vinod. And we cut to Vinod in bed with a buxom beauty and his watch goes beeeep.

Yes, there will be thrills and shocks and action set pieces but more in a believable mould. I loved the recent Casino Royale and Bourne Ultimatum. Again, I’ve to think of an interesting way to weave music as you cant have a spy in these times, singing and romancing a girl over the Niagara Falls. Or can we??”

The way he talks so much about movies other than his, he’s on his way to earn the Desi Tarantino tag.

“Desi Tarantino sounds too funny,” he says.

“And I hope that every film I do will not be like this. I get influenced by so many styles of filmmaking and yet somewhere, I hope I can make films for our audiences, and on my terms.

The next film I’m doing is an offbeat love story. I’m still working on the script and it’s not even titled. But on my comp, I’ve put down that the treatment should be something like Run Lola Run meets Three Colours Blue. What does that mean? I don’t know myself. Filmmaking is a process of discovery and adventure which is what makes it nerve wracking… and fun too.”

That Four Letter Word : Free!

2007-09-27T16:01:00.000+05:30

That four letter word premieres tonight in Bombay at Fun Cinemas, Andheri. If you happen to live in Bombay, feel free to drop in tonight at 10:45. (Free being the operative word)
The movie is releasing tomorrow at the same multiplex and will be playing at the 6:20 slot. Those who can't make it tonight or want to watch it again, do buy tickets and support Independent Cinema! :D

Review: Ram Gopal VarMaa Ki...

2007-09-08T08:52:00.001+05:30

Sorry about the delay in posting the review. Was a little busy all week. You can read my uncut review of Aag or How to burn in hell here.

The first annual indie film festival - i!

2007-08-31T04:30:00.000+05:30

in association with

Indian Independent Filmmakers Foundation

presents

The first Annual Indie Film Festival and Unconference

September 3-7, 2007

Six Degrees

September 3, 2007

0900: Premiere of Apna Aasman directed by Kaushik Roy

1045: Interactive session with Irrfan Khan and Dhruv

1115: Session: Freedom from formula

Panelists: Filmmakers Balu Mahendra, Cheran, Kaushik Roy & Rajat Kapoor

Moderator: K.Hariharan

Scope of discussion: What is Indie Cinema?

Is it defined as the work of an auteur or a result of an economic distinction or medium?

September 4, 2007

0900: Framed directed by Chetan Shah

1100: Session: Cinema as multi-media

Panelists: Chetan Shah, Girish Ramdas (CEO, Galatta.com), Senthil Kumar (Director, Real Image Media Technologies), Suresh (Ananda Pictures), Thyagarajan (Sathyajothi Films), Nag Ravi (CEO, Insight Media).

Moderator: Tan Ngaronga, CEO, Sathyam Cinemas

Scope of discussion: Channels of distribution, exhibition and need for Data Banks

September 5, 2007

0900: Package of student films from L.V.Prasad Film and TV Academy

1100: Session: Script Clinics and Film Clubs

Panelists: K.Hariharan, ‘Crazy’ Mohan, Amritraj Gnanam (Dean, SRM Institute of Communication), Priya V.

Moderator: Madhan (Vijay TV Host/Critic)

Scope of discussion: Nurturing fresh talent, whetting scripts and grooming our young filmmakers

September 6, 2007

0900: Chennai 600028 directed by Venkat Prabhu/ premiere of an unreleased acclaimed film (to-be-confirmed soon)

1130: Session: Financing and Global Perspectives

Panelists: D. Ramakrishnan (NFDC), Madhav Das (G.V. Films), Sriram (Aalayam), Venkat Prabhu, Kamali Ramachandran (Reliance Entertainment).

Moderator: Anita Udeep (CEO, N-Viz Entertainment)

Scope of discussion: Corporatisation of film business, sources of funding.

September 7, 2007

0900: Hari Om directed by Bharatbala

1100: Session: IIFF: The Long Road Ahead

Panelists: Bharatbala (Bharatbala Productions), Kiran Reddy (Sathyam Cinemas), G.Dhananjayan (Moser Baer), Revathy, Rohini and Dharani.

Moderator: Baradwaj Rangan (Features Editor, New Sunday Express)

Scope of discussion: Need for networking, how to keep the movement going, monthly activities, scope and role of film festivals.

Seating for the film festival is free and on a first come first served basis. There are a few seats available for reservation.
Mail iiffchennai@gmail.com to confirm your seat.

And yes, do spread the word.

September 8, 2007

1900: RTFF Edition 3 - The Heist and Neo-Noir Edition

Venue: To be confirmed soon. A friend of mine who has an ad agency has volunteered his roof, it has a little construction debris which is likely to be cleared by the weekend. So will keep you guys updated on that. You can register for RTFF on the wiki.

ECR: Chennai-Pondicherry

2007-08-26T01:29:00.000+05:30

Click the pic to read stories behind those moments.

One day in the life of East Coast Road

I had been meaning to do this ever since I bought a cruiser after watching ‘Motorcycle Diaries.’ To hit the road and ride far away from the everyday mechanics of urban life.

So when a chance came by for this story, I jumped right on to the bike.

Just the previous week, I had postponed a road trip with a friend because my bike was due was service. I still hadn’t fixed the chain noise that was bothering me. But hey! What’s a road trip without any real adventure?

The fact that I had never done 300 kilometres by bike in a day (to Pondicherry and back) only added to the excitement.

The East Coast Road had earned the reputation of being one of the deadliest roads in the State with high accident rates year after year, after being developed as a more scenic alternative route to Mahabalipuram in the late-nineties.

On December 22, 2000, the Tamil Nadu Government and Tamil Nadu Road Development Company (TNRDC) signed up for the improvement of 113.2 km of ECR from Kudimiyandithoppu near Chennai to Koonimedu on the outskirts of Pondicherry, entrusting the task to TNRDC on a long-term basis.

Thanks to a friend who had once worked with TNRDC, I knew a little about the challenges faced by the authorities in maintaining that stretch.

I set out from Anna Nagar at five a.m., picked up Darshan, a friend who’s always game for adventure, from T.Nagar. By 5.45 a.m., we were already cruising down the I.T. corridor, the quickest access route to Thiruvanmiyur – where ECR begins.

The good thing about taking a bike down that road is that you don’t need to shell out the toll fee at the plaza (the ECR scenic beachway route begins a kilometer before the toll gate) that monitors (with surveillance cameras) every car that passes that way.

The East Coast Road, last year, recorded an average traffic of about 10,830 passenger car units every day. According to my insider friend, the volume of traffic has been growing by about 20 per cent every year.

The scenic part of the ride actually begins only a few kilometres after Mayajaal, a little before Muttukadu as casuarina groves hide the sea from the road, showing us occasional glimpses of virgin beaches – only that there is no visible access route to the stretch but through the paper-plate infested groves with boards that warn you of thieves in the area.

The backwaters at Muttukadu reflecting the early morning hues in the sky made for a perfect canvas. We had plenty of photo opportunities every few kilometres thereon.

The bevy of dancers at a local temple festival en route to Mahabs were only too happy to pose for Darshan, as the drummer got into a head-banging trance, encouraged by the presence of the camera.

After a quick meal at Mamalla Bhavan at seven a.m., we clicked a few more pictures at the rock carvings at Mahabalipuram, lured by the sight of goats lending the sculptures a touch of modern art as they scattered themselves strategically all around the caves, striking poses for the camera.

Intrigued by the sight of the number of saffron-clad travellers we had noticed in the course of the last 20 kilometres, we stopped to enquire. Sathish Kumar, part of the faculty at Jeppiar Engineering College, said that he along with his mates Vadivel and Karthikeyan were on their pilgrimage by foot to Velankanni. “We started on Sunday evening. We will reach only on the 27th,” said Sathish.

The traffic had increased since Mahabalipuram and we realised that the best time to hit the road was early morning. There were many buses and share autos hogging road space during the day. Besides, riding in the night is dangerous given that it is near impossible to spot a restless animal darting across the road. Besides, what if the bike broke down?

The only time the bike made that annoying chain noise was when I slowed down and changed to first gear. Maybe I shouldn’t stop too often, I decided, to ensure we weren’t stranded in the middle of nowhere – especially now, that we were halfway between Mahabalipuram and Marakkanam, the town closest to Pondicherry.

That’s when Darshan pointed out to the TNRDC Helpline posts that we had seen every few kilometres all along. He got down to study how they worked, just in case we needed help. The instructions were pretty simple. All you had to do was press the button three times and speak into box.

With just another 50 kilometres to go before Pondicherry and not all that tired, we decided to find out more about the ruins of the Alambarai Fort and backwaters, about five kilometres off ECR.

It was only on those bumpy roads that we realised what a smooth journey it had been till then.
A brief stopover later, we were back on ECR. The Highway Patrol cars shuttle between the toll-gates outside Chennai and Pondicherry throughout the day and it is rather safe road to drive. Closer to sunset, the traffic peaks with people trying to get home before dark. ECR is a beautiful sight in the night indeed with the glowing neon road markings with thermoplastic reflective paints and cats eye delineators. But it’s the stray animals that could kill with their surprise entry.

Once we got to Pondicherry incident-free, we decided to spend the day there and head back early in the morning. With the rains unleashing their fury on the roads late in the evening, we were glad we were indoors.

But as luck would have it, it rained all night. The roads were wet, a light drizzle accompanied us till Mahabalipuram in the morning. But then, we had asked for adventure, right?

Post Script:
The same night I got back, I hit the road again to head to my office. Ten metres later, the bike chain slipped. Took me a while to fix it and 100 metres later, it slipped again. It was close to midnight and I had no option but to ride at 10 km per hour to get to work and sign in before 1 a.m. I asked for this, didn't I? I'm glad I got away riding at that speed for 10 kms when it could've been worse.

Review: Chak De

2007-08-11T04:29:00.000+05:30

Jaideep Sahni is surely one of the finest screenwriters of our times, probably the best mainstream Hindi cinema has seen – Company, Bunty aur Babli, Khosla Ka Ghosla and now, Chak De!

It's high time a screenwriter got his due and that's why I begin with the writer.

What better way to hang your balls out there than by writing an SRK film minus romance, conventional song breaks, melodrama or any of the stereotypes associated with the Yashraj Films banner (and one of the most expensive films at that) for a one-film old Shimit Amin.

Read more.

CNN-IBN: Second innings!

2007-08-10T05:37:00.000+05:30

This episode of Minus 30 appeared a while ago on CNN-IBN. Thanks to Darshan for recording it for me. It's about That Four Letter Word. Here's the whole episode. There's also a segment on Kiruba talking about the best blogs.

That4Letterword.com

2007-08-07T06:48:00.000+05:30

Since the blog has been the ancestral home of the film, we just decided to direct the That4LetterWord domain to the movie blog.

Check into the brand new That4LetterWord.Com for regular updates, news clips and announcements of upcoming screenings.

We're just getting started. Releasing in Mumbai on September 28 at the Fun Cinemas multiplex in Andheri. Tell all your friends in Bombay to start spreading the word.

The pressures of live TV

2007-07-04T15:40:00.000+05:30

For the first time, I had a taste of a live TV Debate, thanks to Baddy. Since it was on Superstar, I jumped at the invite, totally clueless about how it all works.

If you've been on Live TV, you would've got used to the audio-video time lag - the monitor in front of you is playing visuals corresponding to 3-5 seconds earlier but the audio you hear is live... So if you're a first timer like I was, you're gonna have a tough time concentrating.

Part of the confusion was I had no clue when I was on air and when I wasn't because I kept getting cut off and though the host was nice enough to let me continue what I was saying, I had no clue which part of my quote was already aired and what wasn't.

So there I am, all nervous!

You can access the entire debate here.

That Four Letter Word blog updated!

2007-07-04T07:55:00.000+05:30

It's been due for a really long time and I managed to compile all TFLW related posts from the personal blog and export them to the official blog. The reason I had made those posts here was because this, being the main blog, always gets better readership. It's gonna complete 4 lakh hits in about three years and I didn't half imagine I was capable of maintaining one blog and here I have four.

Hopefully, the updated That Four Letter Word blog will facilitate easy reference and smoother navigation.

I've also added some pictures and video clips and a coupla new entries (like the speech I prepared but never delivered on the D-Day) to take you through the entire journey of the film from as far as I can remember.

I'm not sure if any movie blog has had as many entries as TFLW... Can anyone beat 79? Lol!

If I had the resources, I would've printed it as a book and given a copy to all cast, crew, volunteers and friends who have been responsible for this miracle - a triumph for independent cinema.

But since, I don't yet have the money needed for that, here's the e-book equivalent: The blog.

RIP: Director Jeeva

2007-06-26T14:25:00.000+05:30

He met me for an interview before leaving to Russia for the shoot of 'Dhaam Dhoom.' It turned out to be the last one he ever gave.

I woke up this morning to learn that the director of 12B, 'Ullam Ketkume' and 'Unnale Unnale,' passed away in his hotel room at St. Petersburgh during a shooting schedule of the action entertainer starring Jayam Ravi, Kangana Ranaut and Jayaram.

May his soul rest in peace.

He wanted to do a Take Two and expressed his desire to do one on his return from Russia. He may not have been the most original filmmaker, but he was a man with many dreams and one of the few who defied the star-system. He gave Arya, Pooja, Asin, Shaam and Vinay their first big break.

I reproduce below the interview that appeared only last week, after being held at the desk for over a fortnight.

Though the reviews have been mixed, cinematographer-turned-director Jeeva feels vindicated after the box-office success of 'Unnale Unnale.'

"It has definitely reached the audience I had in mind. The market in A centres is as big as B and C. It's just that they don't go to the theatres because nobody makes films for them. But for 'Unnale Unnale,' we have got reports of students going in huge groups. I'm very happy about it."

12B was a bold, though inspired, debut but the film didn't do all that well at the box office. His second film, a fairly decent ode to college and friendship, 'Ullam Ketkume' was hit by production delays and his Hindi remake of 'Run' ran out of theatres.

Maybe, that's why he wanted to be really sure of getting it right the fourth time. Maybe, that's also why 'Unnale Unnale' is among the most 'inspired' of all his films.

That's among the first questions we ask him: Why does Unnale Unnale seem to be inspired from so many romantic comedies in Hindi and English?

"Suppose you are studying medicine as a medical student, you will go to the library, read up related books," says Jeeva. "So when we make films, we watch all kinds of films... so many films for reference. It is just a point of inspiration. If I didn't make characters say 'Day One,' (a narrative gimmick seen before in 'Kal Ho Na Ho') I would've had to show the calendar, which has been used in so many other films.

So maybe one or two things, not completely. Overall, it is a different film."

"Just like how there are only seven notes in music, there are only a few stories you can tell," he explains. "We're not giving proper films for the people in the city. So they watch Hindi films and English films. I wanted to make a classic romantic film in Tamil. It is a realistic film, not a typical fantasy film."

How did he arrive at the choice of Vinay as the lead?

"I wanted to cast a character in the film. Not a hero. Vinay and Sada suited the characters.

I saw him in an ad, he was very convincing," says the filmmaker who had earlier launched Shaam, Arya, Asin and Pooja.

No auditions? "Anybody can act. Even you can."

Tanisha, however, had to be cajoled into doing the film but the script did the trick. "Tanisha is fresh, young and bubbly. She was the right person for the role. First, she was like: 'What you people only call us for glamour...' So I told her to read the script and then tell us. Once she read the script, she agreed."

The idea for 'Unnale Unnale' was born out of gender wars. "Men versus Women. That was the starting point. There have been lots of films on the subject. 'When Harry met Sally,' 'Before Sunrise,' 'Before Sunset'... 'French Kiss' is my favourite. We also borrowed a lot of dialogues from the internet. There are so many interesting jokes on the net."

Jeeva was convinced that there was one set of movie-going audience that was not watching Tamil films. "There is a huge vaccuum of films catering to the youth. Coimbatore, Trichy, all A centres shows are continuously full. The college goers are enjoying the film. Everybody recollects and connects to what has happened to them in life."

His next film, 'Dhaam Dhoom' is for all centres, meant for a larger audience. The film stars Jayam Ravi, Kangana Ranaut, Lakshmi Rai, Jayaram. The music by Harris Jayaraj and art by Thotta Tharani. "One schedule in Pollachi is over. We have another schedule in Russia."

Jeeva is also quick to justify his choice of foreign locations, like Australia in 'Unnale Unnale.' "When you go to Bombay, you look for people you can associate with, people from the South. Similarly, when you go out of the country, you look for Indians. People become closer when out of country."

Now that formula-filmmaking has brought him success, does he plan to take the road less travelled 12-B route again?

"12B wasn't promoted properly. The market is ready for different kinds of films. I want to prove myself first and then with my own money, I'll make different kinds of films."

Casting & Crew Call: New Projects at the MADE IN MADRAS inkOperated Film School!

2007-06-21T01:40:00.000+05:30

Wanna make films?

If you have the next one year of your life free AND if are looking to learn on the job, join the MADE IN MADRAS inkOperated Film School (which I must admit is a full fledged con-job; filmmaking is a con-job).

Over the next one year, the producers of THAT FOUR LETTER WORD will be producing half a dozen shorts and one feature length film. We've already finalised scripts for three fake Grindhouse trailers and the full length feature and are currently on the lookout for cast and crew for the same.

If you want to be part of the crew, be warned that this is not something you can do in your free time, the work involves full-time effort. Even worse, you will not be paid until all projects are completed. You may want to sign up only if you're looking for hardcore experience behind the scenes as assistant directors or production executives. People interested in art, production design, costumes, screenwriting and make-up most welcome.

As part of the cast, we're looking for:
1. VIV: EIGHT TO TEN-YEAR-OLD, short, brown-skinned or fair, chubby, confident little actor who can speak flawless English, without any sort of an accent.

2. SHWETA: TEN TO TWELVE-YEAR-OLD, tall, fair, slim, talkative, bubbly actor who should be able to talk flawless English and fluent Hindi. Role requires her to dance well.

3. SURAJ: 22-YEAR-OLD, athletic, intense good-looker with boyish charm, who should be equally convincing as someone who is 18-20 and someone who CAN look 24. Should be able to speak flawless English and fluent Hindi. The role requires actor to dance, drive and ride a bike under difficult road conditions.

Apart from these characters, we are looking for attractive girls in the age group of 20-23 for guest roles in the film and the trailers, actors of foreign nationalities (any colour), people who look like zombies (acting skills not necessary) and enthusiastic volunteers to play corpses (all you will be asked to do is drop dead with ketchup smeared on your body).

Do email madeinmadras at gmail dot com specifying if you are applying for CAST or CREW in the subject line. With a coupla photographs, if you're applying for CAST.

MADE IN MADRAS inkOperated Film School has just one teacher. Cinema, itself. We're learning and we want company. The more the merrier.

Spread the word. Starting July 1st, you will have the time of your life. Good or bad. Mostly bad. And, some good. In that order.

Sivaji: A review of reviews

2007-06-18T07:41:00.000+05:30

I’m not gonna take names of critics or link blogs since I just wanted to address points made in other reviews. My arguments are against criticism of the film and not against the authors. So if you think this is about your review, please don’t take this personally.

First, get this. Superstar can act. He’s proved it enough times. He does not need to prove it anymore. I had written in an earlier post how there is a rigid dichotomy between the function of an actor and a matinee idol.

While an actor is expected to change colours and showcase his artistic range, an icon is expected to consistently embody all those traits that people love about his personality and reprise them in whatever story he is a part of. Because he’s an icon, a superhero – THE reason why people go to watch that kind of cinema.

Obviously, the gratification superheroes provide is different from the kind of gratification actors provide. Sometimes, though not always, even the audience differs. We’ve always had a Sivaji for every MGR, a Kamal for every Rajni, a Vikram for every Vijay (at least, until Vikram decided to change roles from actor to icon!)

Let’s not forget that Superstar has done his share of intelligent classy cinema in the past.

Now, he’s into something more intelligent. Reaching out to a huge far-from-homogenous mass of people. We’re talking about a diverse bunch that takes the aruval out over culture, chastity, caste, class, colour, ideology, politics, religion, language, state boundaries and water among other things.

Why should Superstar reach out to this huge a mass again?

Because that’s what superheroes and icons do.

They reach out to stand up for what is right, to fight for the oppressed majority.

They reach out to assure people that no matter how screwed up and complicated life maybe, there’s always one person they can turn to.

Or, at least fantasise that there’s someone who’s gonna kick bad asses and spread hope.

The word associated with superheroes, my friends, is fantasy. The thing about the format of a fantasy, as a genre, it does not need to delve into plausibility, rational thinking, logical reasoning or what people call a “tight” screenplay.

Think fantasy again.

Think about the free-flowing Alice in Wonderland that probably gave you no idea where in the burrow it was heading.

Think Superman who turned the planet back in time after losing Lois Lane.

Think James Bond, who gets his ass covered by women who bare their ass most of the time.

Think Peter Parker, who recently blubbered when Mary Jane broke up with him.

Think Captain Jack Sparrow.

Wait a minute, Captain Jack Sparrow runs away all the time. He got fooled by a woman, got himself handcuffed to the Black Pearl at the end of ‘Dead Man’s Chest.’ When he realises there’s no way out, he goes down fighting, with his head held high.

Does that make him any less heroic? Or does the fact that Shriya saves Sivaji at the end of what was a light-hearted comic segment? Interestingly, Superstar does hop around around like Captain Jack Sparrow as he sees the train approaching and then when Shankar changes gear from the comic to the serious, Superstar stands his head held high, ready to embrace death, much like Sparrow. The point really isn’t that Shriya saved him. The point is that she was willing to die for him.

A Superstar is timeless. His age does not matter. How does Bond remain the same age when the world around him changes as suggested by technology? How many years did Peter Parker be a college kid? How many years did Superstar live in America to earn Rs.200 crores? What’s his business model? Why does Peter Parker take Mary Jane on his scooter when he can just swing around the buildings in the dark of the night? Superheroes have a comic book license that excuses them from having to answer such smartasses. Things said have to be taken for granted. That’s common sense.

To get back to the analysis, this is not just a Superstar movie.

This is as much a Shankar film as much as it is Superstar cinema. Shankar is one of those few idealist filmmakers who believe that cinema can bring in reform. After addressing capitalist educationists (Gentleman), corrupt bureaucrats (Indian), lazy-ass politicians (Muthalvan) and indifferent apathetic citizens (Anniyan), he wants to address a more basic function that involves the common man. Paying taxes. He knows most people think taxes are unfair, a “fine” for doing fine. He hates the fact that there are many among the rich who don’t pay taxes. Now, how do you make the prospect of paying taxes more attractive to the common man?

You get a brand ambassador, someone they all like, to tell them: “Listen up guys, Black money is bad. Not paying taxes is bad. We’re not a poor country. The richer get richer, the poor get poorer because the rich get away not paying tax and the poor need to keep paying for getting anything they want – starting from basic education.”
That’s a noble thought, a well-intended message, that in order to reach a mass of Superstar crazy fans needs to be said within the format of a six-song six-fight routine, with the mandatory happy ending.

Why is the happy ending so important?

Kamal Hassan could afford to die in ‘Indian’ and ‘Nayakan’ because he’s an actor. An actor becomes immortal when he dies in a film. People give him a standing ovation. A Best Actor award. But, a superhero is reduced to a mere mortal when he dies in a movie. Which is why Shankar and Mani Ratnam knew they had to keep him alive in ‘Thalapathy’ and ‘Sivaji,’ no matter what the odds against them were.
It’s not a compromise. It’s common-sense. It’s what people go to fantasies for. To see their hero kick butt.

So why is Sivaji among the most memorable Rajnikant films ever despite a rather weak romantic track?

Oh, let’s think about that critically slaughtered romantic track again. There’s clearly a shift in Superstar’s philosophy. From ‘Thou Shall Choose Who Loves You Over Who You Love’ (that emerged in Valli and continued till Baba… Listen to Dippu Dippu:
thaedi cheLLum kaadhaL/kaadhaliLLai nanbaa/uNmai kaadhal soLLava/
naLLa kaadhal enbadheNNa/thaedi vandhey kaadhalae) to ‘Best To Live With Who You Love Than What You Get.’ (Kadachavangaloda Vaazhradhoda Pudichavangaloda Vaazharadhuthaan Santhosham).

A complete volte-face.

Why? I guess it is to make Superstar contemporary from being a pragmatic chauvinist to a die-hard romantic because Shankar’s brand of idealism needs a romance to die for. Colour is such an important part of the South Indian’s psyche. Shankar exploits that complex inherent in his audience by having their icon endorse their ‘Fair and Lovely’ aspirations. ‘Velai Thamizhan’ (mentioned in the Style song) is part of that fantasy of the dark-skinned man’s obsession over fair and lovely maidens from Mumbai (starting from Nagarrth Khan known as Khushboo, Rishibala Naval a.k.a. Simran Bagga, Namrata Sadanah a.k.a. Nagma, Jyotika Sadanah and now Shriya Saran). Shankar turns that sentiment into a feel-good fantasy by coating it with the comic treatment and then making the girl say that the dark colour is the best part of their favourite hero. He’s trying to tell them that even if by some miracle they do manage to turn fair, it’s still ‘coool’ to be dark.

Let me get back to the observation with which I started this piece. Stars or Icons are known to consistently embody all those traits that people love about their personality and reprise them in whatever story they are a part of.

Not all the traits Superstar has been known for are politically correct.

Now, Superstar has been criticised by politicians and health activists that he has glamourised the Cancer stick. Superstar, in his last two outings, has tried to make amends – Biscuit in Chandramukhi and Chewing Gum in Sivaji. Superstar’s heroines, over the years, have often been dependents – college students or village belles, often being slapped by the hero. This sort of unabashed chauvinism might not work in the 2000s and in an attempt to make it progressive, Shankar gives us a middle-class working woman. It’s also contemporary because finally, the woman is an equal with who Sivaji shares his life and secrets, and she’s also capable of saving him.

Yes, she’s still the meek submissive lover but hey, things can’t change overnight in Tamil cinema.

I was amazed at the focus of Shankar’s screenplay (I hated his character mix in Anniyan!). He begins Sivaji with the classic Flashback structure, establishing the intentions of the protagonist in the very first three scenes. At the airport, we know he’s come to settle down in India with the line-up of girls waiting to snare him. At the get-together later, we know he wants to get to the root of poverty that he has seen (the beggar at the crossroads sandwiched between the scenes of his arrival and his declaration of intent) – empowering through education.

Once he lays down the agenda for the film, he gets to the other objective of the protagonist – his search for a life partner, an epitome of everything Tamil. He then addresses the social problem of families being so fiercely protective of their space with a strict regard for boundaries that they don’t encourage the courting ritual. Romance needs healthy grounds to blossom. And since at the basic level, marriages in India are about the union of families than just two individuals, he shows us how one family manages to woo the other through a light-hearted comic segment (not all of which I approve – certainly not the bit where Thalaivar goes red with chillies and washes it down the basin graphically but Shankar has always loved to show us what’s gross). This track is smartly paralleled with the protagonist’s efforts to build the college facing hurdles with the ground realities of red tape that leads to corruption… that further escalates politics. He shows us the rich have become too powerful to take on. No matter how much money you have, they can still pull you down and leave you penniless. It doesn't get tighter than this.

At the interval block, his twin intentions of getting the right girl and building the college are the lowest point. Things can only get better from here and as that coin turns, so does his fate and Shankar flips mode from reality to fantasy. Now, this is the part we’ve been waiting for. The part that Shankar absolutely revels in. The part that puts Sivaji in the list of his most memorable films.

We see Rajni fight his way back, like in Annamalai, like in Padayappa, like in Baasha, he gets his chance to payback… Line for line, coin for coin… “Kooti kazhichu paaru, Kannakku Seriya Irukkum… Yenkitta Kannakku Pesuraanga. Yedu Vandi!”

Now, all those films were about personal triumph, this one is a little larger than that. It’s about a triumph for the society, issues are large and complex and they need to be simplified with comic book storytelling. The villain needs to be someone you hate with all your guts and having a despicable soft speaking scum is a nice touch. After all those Perarasu films, I was turning deaf with all the yelling.

Settling a score is what most films have been about. And seriously, who does it better than Superstar. What makes Sivaji memorable is that it also plays out like a Best of Rajni compilation. It has features his best looks, get-ups, gestures, dialogue delivery, plot-devices and also enriches his existing repertoire of style, facilitating a connect with the Rajni we know from the past to the Superstar he has become to what he could be – the reformer, a Sivaji (the actor par excellence) who could also be MGR (the messiah).

Entertainment has never been so explosive. The last act is pure dynamite. Climax is at its orgasmic best if you’re a Rajni fan. Something that works like a charm especially because of the extended foreplay in the slightly flawed first half.

To Shankar’s credit, even those stray scenes of mediocrity are salvaged by a classy Vivek whose timing in Sivaji is probably a career-best. Jalra has never made itself more audible during a one-man orchestra in concert.

Now that I’ve taken my critic’s hat off, Thalaivaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!
:D

Sivaji Premiere: Live updates: Spoiler-fest!

2007-06-14T22:15:00.000+05:30

Click on the title to listen to the interview that Superstar gave ahead of the premiere on Times Now.

I'm messaging from the premiere of Sivaji. These updates shall continue for as long as my girlfriend is awake and can type them in.

9.45 - Spotted- Aishwarya Rajnikanth, Parthipan, Dharani, Priyadarshan, Thotta Tharani. I realise everyone I know is alloted different theatres. My photographer is alloted Santham, Baradwaj Rangan has got seats in Seasons, Sreedhar Pillai has the seats for Sathyam Balcony.

10:08 - Inside six degrees. Everyone has been given party poppers. Movie yet to start.

10.20 - Trisha is sitting right behind me. Great, I can get at least one quote for my story on Saturday morning.

10.30 - Sultan is Rajnikant's next film. It's an animation film directed by Soundarya Rajnikant produced by Ocher Studios. It has music by A.R.Rahman. Thalaivar is animated but Superstar has lent his voice himself. Releasing 2008. The trailer began with showing shoes of a warrior and then goes to reveal Thalaivar with a sword.

10.32 - People burst party poppers spouting out confetti, supplied by Sathyam, as the alphabets S-U-P-E-R-S-T-A-R followed by R-A-J-N-I appear.

10.35 - Thalaivar with a mask over his face gets out of the police van to be escorted to prison as thousands of people watch in horror. His first soundbyte however is inside the van when a police officer politely suggests that he wears the mask lest people get emotional seeing him and we hear: "Um"

10.40 - Superstar plays a software systems architect NRI who has saved up for 25 years before returning to India with noble intentions. Flashback begins with the eligible bachelor sporting an orange tie with a beige suit and jeans, being recieved by his parents and Vivek, his maama, at the airport. With dreams of starting a free medical college and hospital for students. Adiseshan (Suman in Ray Ban) is his adversary, a Jeppiar-like character, who lives of capitation fee collected from students.

10.45 - Nayantara has never looked hotter before. She's skinny and pretty, two things we didn't even imagine she could be. She does the opening intro song 'Ballelaka' as Thalaivar dances with extras who have their tummies painted with tigers and Thalaivar's face of course.

11.00 - Bubble gum is the cigarette replacement. Vivek interrupts Thalaivar before he delivers a punchline saying that he shouldn't bother because every other boy on screen is unable to control his finger movements. And then, Vivek comes up with some cheeky ones that rhyme Katpadi with Deadbody and Pogo with Go Go! (Something like Kozhaindaga Paakurathu Pogo, Sivajiya paathu nee go go). The best one however is "Sixukku Aparam Sevenu, Sivajikku aparam Yevenu?"

11.15 - Shriya sizzled in that 'Vaaji Vaaji' song. She is sooo hawt!! And thalaivar's comedy doesn't seem to work much, at least not in that scene where he's washing his mouth after eating a plate full of chillis! Please cut this scene out, Shankar. Not good for his stature.

11.35 - Thalaivar turns white!! That's a well concealed suprise considering the lyrics are such a giveaway. Listen to the 'Style' song again! After seeing the blonde stills we were prepared for the worst but it's not that bad, trust me. Shriya is well... yummy!

11.55 - Riches to rags. All he is left with is one buck, given to him by Adi who completely ruins him and recommends begging for a future. Thalaivar has tried doing good the right way. That didn't work. So now he tosses up that coin to let it decide his fate: Heads (Singha vazhi) or Tails (Poo vazhi). No prizes for guessing what it spells out.

12 Midnight - Interval. Interesting interval block setting up stage for a rocking second half but the first half alone, seen in isolation, is just about ok that shines through a few sparklers here and there.

Talking points during interval: The wooing segment is clearly the downer. Thalaivar has often advocated that 'Thou Shalt Choose One Who Loves You Over The One You Love.' Now, he does a volte face. Clearly, the one defining quality about all successful films has been that he does not chase the girl. Shankar turns that on its head this time. Like Suresh Krissna did earlier (and unsuccessfully) in Baba.
Also, Shankar knows that colour (or lack of it) is a huge part of the Tamil psyche. He exploits it to create a feel good mood.
The other thing that Shankar totally understands is the impact of corruption on the middle-class. This time instead of focussing on how the middle class are affected, he shows us how difficult it is even for the rich and those willing to do good are impaired by the complexities of bureaucracy and red tape.

12.30 - That coin flipping style is a class act. Thalaivaaaa!!! Only he can reinvent himself like this!

12.40 - Another super punchline when this bunch of goons catch hold of him and say: Thaniya maatikittae paathiya? And Superstar says: "Panningathaan kootama varum..." He then dislodges five of them with one single kick sending them flying all around him before completing: "Singham... single ah varum" *Whistle Whistle*

1.00 - Adhiradi is awesome!! The best picturised Rajni song I've ever seen... A Robert Rodriguez guns and guitars tribute. And Thalaivar looks smashing as never before! And Shriya... Slurp!! Trisha behind me surely must be envying her buddy there. Shriya's simply the single sexiest siren since Simran scorched our screens.

1.15 - There's also this Peter Jackson visual effects tribute as fx-crazy Shankar sends a Superstar's car crashing into King Kong's mouth! Whoa!! I've never felt younger before... Thalaivaaaaah once again! I forgot to mention Thalaivar earlier did some wonderful imitations of MGR, Sivaji and yes... Kamal Hasan... Check him out doing Nethu Raathri... :D

1.25 - Okay, there's this really corny twist coming up... as cheeseball as it gets in our movies... In fact I saw this coming in the first half of the film when Raghuvaran brings back to life a boy who was electrocuted and soon explains to Thalaivar how that is possible. Lotsa folks out there are gonna roll their eyes when this happens and the biggest critics will call this film trash just because of this twist. But for us willing believers, this is a splendid excuse for Shankar to unleash yet another new look: the mottai boss who's called not Sivaji but... find out for yourself! *clap clap*

1.45 - Mottai Boss rocks! And the style associated with the character... I can't stop grinning and I realise I've been grinning for the last one hour.

1.50 - Trisha tells me she loved the film. "He's so hot," she says. Great, I have my quote.

2.00 - I wait for Baddy till the show at Seasons gets over. Turns out that he didn't like it much. In fact he called the first half "excruciatingly boring". For me, I can't wait to watch it again. And I'm doing exactly that in five hours from now.

*This post was updated only by 5 a.m. because I realised pretty late that my girlfriend did put up a Live Update on the blog before she went off to sleep and hence didnt get a chance to update my messages. Review will be up in 24 hours. Though to be honest, Superstar films shouldn't be reviewed. Only idiots will look for logic and contest plausibility in a superhero tale. But do come back, ill give it a shot anyway*

Borat: Sexual learnings on a feminism

2007-06-07T03:29:00.000+05:30

Just watched Borat yet again. This clip reminds me of an old post I made in the Elder Brother Column soon after watching the 'movie-film' the first time.

Ignore that post if you aren't a Borat fan (the language may offend you) but I like this bit where Elder Brother tells Borat Sagdiyev:

"Feminism is about the equality of the sexes and not about the similarity... Men and women, though equal, are different. Saying the contrary is a grossly incorrect gender generalisation."

Yeah, I should update the Anti-Agony column more regularly.

It's fun to bitch about women in my own exclusive space where Shonali doesn't get to defend em!

All in good humour, sweethearts. You know we men (well, at least, most of us) love you (well, most of you).

Test Podcast: Chinmayi chats with Gangai Amaren

2007-06-04T12:14:00.000+05:30

Click on the Title link for the podcast file.

Singer-RJ-TV show host-psychologist-voiceover artiste and blogger Chinmayi talks to music director-songwriter-director-RJ Gangai Amaren. They had the most explosive Take Two we've have ever recorded and since the text transcript couldn't do justice to the 83-minute-conversation, here's the uncut version. Chinmayi countered his dynamite arguments quite sensitively. Especially, when he decided to criticise his maestro-brother Ilaiyaraja.

Listen to it with headphones for best results! Works fine on Firefox and if you have Quicktime. Some of my IE user friends seem to have problems. Any idea how to make it work across platforms/browsers?

Sivaji: Swades meets Nayakan?

2007-05-30T23:17:00.000+05:30

I'm sure most of you have already seen this trailer (thanks Ramya), and I hate the fact that I now have to wait for at least two and a half weeks before getting to see THE BOSS - Bachelor Of Sosial Servees.

Thalaivaa!!

Got to admit that the release of the trailer today did steal the thunder from all that excitement of getting to watch the Pirates 3 premiere on Thursday night at Sathyam Cinemas. Had planned to watch Dead Man's Chest for the fifth time and now, I can't help but watch the two and a half minute trailer back-to-back, over and over again.

Here are a few thoughts on The Boss.

1. In spite of the shocker of a movie that Anniyan was (though it did exceedingly well, I didn't like it much personally), I'm pretty sure Shankar is gonna rock this one. He's got a formula that can't go wrong. Let's see now:

Style: Check (Baba was him at his worst without the moustache and all, this one has power dressing from Manish Malhotra... Let's just erase the memory of Thalaivar in that blonde wig. We know it's just intended to shock and he won't be doing more than one para of a song with that on!)

Babe: Check (Certainly better than Nagma, Soundarya, Meena, Manisha Koirala or Nayantara. Thalaivar's rarely got his choice of babe right! The best of the lot, Ramya Krishnan had to settle for vamp, so did chubby Jo!)

Comedy: Check (Vivek rocked Shankar's last and if the jokes in the trailer are any indication, the comedy has to do with Thalaivar's attempts to become fair. How lovely! Every dark man's fantasy becomes a feel good joke.)

Action: Double Check (Shankar's always given us an overdose, so nothing to worry about in that department. And with Thalaivar around, there's so much more potential to kick butt.)

Sentiment: Check (From the promo we figure that though his intentions are noble, his family and lover do have a problem with the means he uses for reform. Seems like a decent enough premise for family sentiment.)

Punchlines: Check-mate (Looks like he doesn't need them here. When he takes that phone and says "BOSS," it is more than a punchline. It is knock-out line.)

* * *

After watching Swades, I couldn't help thinking: What if the same movie was made with Thalaivar in the lead but in the six-song six-fight comedy-track format.

Noble intentions (a film on reform) served with formula seemed to be an ideal potion to work magic with the masses. Not that arriving at that formula is an easy task. For a director like Shankar though, that is the easy part.

He already has mastered the formula, what he didn't have was a noble subject with a hero of demi-god status. Which he now has.

The script he had last written for Superstar went to Arjun. We know the film went on to be a super hit. Had Superstar done that movie, we wouldn't have had to wait till Chandramukhi to prove to all of India that even in this day and his age, there is only one sun, one moon and one SUPERSTAR!

* * *

Shankar has played the Robinhood card before with Gentleman.

After one vigilante outing in Indian and an ordinary-man-turned-chief minister in Mudhalvan, (I'm skipping all his light hearted films) I thought that the master of formula tried too hard with Anniyan. Any hero who cries, even if he's Spider-Man, is plain sissy. And we had two sissies and a psycho in Anniyan. Vikram as a sissy common-man (Ambi), then as the wannabe model wanting to do "the yoyo" (Rampwalk Remo: Complete Wuss again!) and as then as the psychotic over-actor who quoted mumbo-jumbo from Garudapuranam was not my idea of a superhero.

It's good that he's going back to the Robinhood story. Nayakan was classic Robinhood. So when the boss says, "The rich get richer, the poor get poorer," we can feel the credible angst of athe angry young reformer. We don't care he makes those phone calls. As long as he can transform stones to homes. And it only gives us more reason to cheer that this 21st century reformer is our very own SUPERSTAR.

* * *

If I go nuts (In case I already haven't) in the next 16 days, you know who to blame.

P.S: Regular movie programming continues on Sudermovies. Just posted Cheeni Kum.
Update: Also up: Ek Chalis Ki Last Local, Shootout at Lokhandwala, Shrek 3 and Pirates 3: At World's End.

Coming Soon on Sudermovies!

2007-05-07T16:59:00.001+05:30

Yeah, Spidey turns gay in 3!

Update: Maayakkannadi on Sudermovies!

2007-04-16T05:45:00.000+05:30

Read complete review here.

Propaganda in The Pursuit of Happyness?

2007-04-16T02:15:00.000+05:30

Recently, I had this long argument with my Professor and friend, Rakesh Katarey, about The Pursuit of Happyness. He suggested that I blog about it to generate discussion.

The Cinema Club of Coimbatore had organised a screening of the film which was followed by a discussion. This story sort of sums up the key observations.

The Prof. is convinced that the Will Smith film, like most Hollywood products, has a hidden agenda: To re-inforce faith in the system.

"Though filmmakers claim to make films about blacks, the objective is to let the black community know that whites are not bad."

I did point out that it was Chris Gardner himself who produced the film along with Will Smith but then his argument was that it was the studios that run Hollywood.

In this age of 'Syriana,' 'Borat' and 'Fahrenheit 911,' I refuse to believe in conspiracy theories about the system using popular culture as a vehicle of propaganda.

Showbiz has been, is and will always be about what Rod Tidwell famously told Jerry Maguire. "Show me the money." And that translates to any content/story that many people around the world would buy.

The politics of business transcends the business of politics. What say?

Update: Provoked on Sudermovies!

2007-04-11T16:13:00.000+05:30

Read the review here.

Interview

2007-04-11T01:23:00.000+05:30

A reader recently had mailed me a few questions on filmmaking for an article he wanted to do for his site.

Since I haven't found time to post much, thought I'll just link.

Have been watching a lot of films. So I guess it is time to update the reviews on Sudermovies. Do watch that space.

Chai@Tranquilitea

2007-04-06T14:57:00.000+05:30

If you happen to be around Coonoor, do drop in at Tranquilitea, run by this enterprising 25-year-old called Sandeep Subramani. It's a must-do for tea-lovers. I had the best chai in the Nilgiris out here. And it totally lives upto its name.

Wish I lived here!

2007-04-06T14:51:00.000+05:30

The Red Hill Nature Resort on Emerald Valley, a little away from Ooty. It's in the middle of nowhere. The place belongs to this very hospitable gentleman called Vijay Kumar. Thank you for the tea. I love your place.

The view from there!

2007-04-06T14:43:00.000+05:30

This is the view from Red Hill Nature Resort. With food, home-stay and guest-house facilities, they charge Rs.3000 off-season and Rs.4000 during peak season.

For reservations, email Vijay Kumar at vijayredhill [at] yahoo [dot] co [dot] in

Vijay Kumar has spent all his life in this heritage bungalow.

How does he feel? He cannot imagine living anywhere else, he says. He travels 28 kilometres to Ooty to do grocery shopping.

Lost in the hills!

2007-04-06T14:34:00.000+05:30

Just got back from a weeklong tour of the Nilgiris. Had absolutely no access to the internet or newspapers for five days. And most of the time the phone was out of range too.

I took this pic from a makeshift lookout point from the Korakundah forest. To the right is the Silent Valley in Kerala and what is left is Tamil Nadu.

I love these Road Less Travelled trips. I love my space.

It happened one night!

2007-03-28T03:07:00.000+05:30

In case you missed the first edition of the Roof Top Film Festival, here's the report on Sudermovies.

One helluva summer!

2007-03-23T06:03:00.000+05:30

Life has turned upside down already and we're hardly through with the first phase of the That Four Letter Word rollout. The summer heat is only making things all the more hectic.

And, that's because I've decided to stay indoors during the day and work nights. So please don't bother calling me anytime before lunch. The only time I get to sleep is between six a.m. and noon.

We've had trade enquiries from around the world, proposals for two other films this year, one of which we're scheduled to shoot this summer. Thankfully, a friend's chipping in to handle distribution.

I desperately need a holiday to go finish the script. I think I will manage to take the next week off under the pretext of doing a travel feature.

But before I take off, there's so much temptation all around. There's World Cup cricket, there are a dozen new DVDs lying around waiting to be watched, there's 'Heroes,' 'Lost,' 'Prison Break,' (second season) and 'My Name is Earl' to catch up on, there's the Roof Top Film Festival this weekend, there are meetings lined up with investment consultants this being the year end and all, a couple of other script-discussion meetings and I need to do all of this without reducing the time I spend with my darling girlfriend. So even if the personal blog isn't updated too often, do drop in at Sudermovies. Given the volume of movies I watch and the nature of my job, I don't have a choice but to discuss films.

I'm looking forward to the Roof Top Film Festival. From what I heard from Sagaro, we had an interesting line-up of films -- a couple of low budget indie films from America (Primer and Hard Candy have been shortlisted) and at least a couple of first low-budget films by master directors (there's a choice between George Lucas's THX 1138, Christopher Nolan's 'Following,' Roman Polanski's 'Knife in the Water,' Steven Spielberg's 'Duel'.

Would be good to watch these again and discuss them with an enthusiastic bunch of movie buffs who have signed up for the all-nighter movie marathon. Given that most of those who have registered are young movie buffs and aspiring filmmakers, I think films like these will go a long way to inspire them to make films.

It's seven in the morning, already an hour into my bedtime. Pardon the rambling.

Chenquieh!

Bob Woolmer's blog

2007-03-19T02:00:00.000+05:30

This was the last post Bob Woolmer made on his blog.

There were 15 comments when I checked. The last one -- the one asking him to resign -- was posted this morning, maybe a few hours before he was found unconscious and subsequently, declared dead.

Update: 'Mozhi' on Sudermovies!

2007-03-14T03:31:00.000+05:30

I finally got to watch 'Mozhi.'

I like the way this Radhamohan guy makes his films. Our own Rajkumar Hirani. Read more on Sudermovies.

Announcing Sudermovies!

2007-03-09T17:03:00.000+05:30

I know that an overdose of own film is probably making it boring for a lot of you regular readers. But like I said a few weeks ago, I've stopped blogging for readers.

It's a more personal exercise these days. So if there's only That Four Letter Word in my mind, that's all you will find here.

But I do understand that a lot of you come here mainly to read my reviews. To save you the trouble of reading largely self-indulgent posts, I give you Sudermovies, my new blog on movie reviews, opinions and random thoughts.

And for those of you who still haven't seen TFLW, read the post below. It's playing at Studio 5, Sathyam Cinemas at 11 a.m. on March 10 and 11. Those who've already seen the film, please spread the word and let your friends know.

B-A-C-K: Due to public demand!

2007-03-08T02:10:00.000+05:30

That Four Letter Word will return back to Studio 5, Sathyam Cinemas this weekend. A few days ago, I was so sure that not more than 20 people would actually wake up to watch TFLW so early on a weekend. I was so wrong.

We had a little over 50 per cent occupancy on Saturday morning.

And then, over 80 per cent of the hall was full the very next morning.

Thank you Madras for waking up early on a Sunday and making it to the theatres just to watch the movie.

Due to public demand, we're bringing the movie back at 11 a.m. just for all those of you who complained that 10.30 was too early.

So all you guys who still haven't got a chance to see the film, here are a coupla more chances. March 10th & 11 (Morning show @ 11 a.m.) The advance bookings will open on Thursday and you can book online through that yellow banner on the sidebar towards your right. Since this is a digital film, for best results, do watch it from the back rows.

I thank each and every one of you who have seen the film for your support. If you didn't like the film, I'm truly sorry I let you down. And all those who've seen it three times or more, I can't thank you enough. I'm really touched that some of you have listed That Four Letter Word among your favourite films on Orkut. I'm not sure if it deserves a place there but thank you so very much for being kind.

Painting or Poster?

2007-03-07T03:23:00.000+05:30

I was talking to one of my friends about how people perceive a film like That Four Letter Word.

Some end up reviewing it like it's another mainstream movie or a Hollywood romantic comedy in the theatres. And, some take it so seriously and take it up as their subject of critique. But thankfully, there have also been many who have seen it for what it really is.

Paintings and posters should never be compared by the same set of parameters.

Posters are designed for a purpose. To deliver a message to a mass. There's a certain amount of slickness in production, boldface screamers, simple smart copy and colourful visuals with instant appeal, tailored to deliver the communication to a mass audience. Or, like most commercial cinema, it aims at giving you pleasure for the money you've paid. But being a whore filmmaker needs a certain amount of shamelessness.

Paintings, however, are just an expression of the artist. Almost like an extension of his thought-process and imagination. Or, like most art cinema, it aims at giving the creator all the pleasure. But, we all know that wankers do it only because they got no takers.

So, Is TFLW a poster or a painting?

Neither. As a beginner, I do not have the skills required for a painting.

And with my limited resources, I cannot afford the production values a poster requires.

So what is TFLW?

The independent film That Four Letter Word, at best, works as a scrapbook. A scrapbook that's personal, random and straight from the heart. It has these sketches of characters, especially, those you would instantly identify among your friends. It tells you only as much as you need to know, as much as any comic book would tell you about its heroes.

It does not say one of these characters is you. It only hints that you could be any of them or all of them at different points in your life. Each character epitomises and personifies one way to live your life. That sort of generalisation was needed so that we could face off one approach with another. It is this generalisation that has worked with the lowest common denominator among the youth. And it is this generalisation that has made a coupla inexperienced critics call the film 'shallow'.

At another level, this is a film on male bonding. And it is not about the girls and their lives. The girls are just sub-plots and their role in the film is limited to their impact on the lives of the four central characters (Which is why all posters and publicity have more of the guys and less of the girls). The girls' approach to life and backstory is explained in the comic book right at the beginning of the film. That's all you need to know about them. In fact, a lot of women have been able to identify with the way the guys live their lives. Because, like Vishal, they sometimes wear their heart on the sleeve. Like Prashant, sometimes they have a head on their shoulder. Like Sunil, they have been confused. Like Zebra, they have sought escape through alcohol.

Like I explained to someone in the comments section of the 'Nishabd' review, we can only judge the depth or shallowness of a script depending on what the filmmaker is trying to say. If Varma wants us to understand the love story between a 60 year old man and 18 year old girl, he needs to show and tell us more than shaved legs. He needs to give us a glimpse into the conversations that led to the unusual attraction.

So what am I trying to say in my film?

The only point I'm making through the film That Four Letter Word is that different people have different approaches towards chasing their dreams. We do not pass value judgements on whether you should be Vishal and listen to your heart all the time or that you should be Prashant and use your head all the time. We are just telling you that even if you are as confused as Sunil is in the film or as escapist as Zebra in the film, life has its ways of bringing you solutions.

All TFLW says, like Sunil often says in the film, is that God is just the scriptwriter. It is upto each one of us to do what we want with that script. We have to direct that script the way we want to do it. It is up to us whether we want to keep the sad scenes short or indulge in the fun scenes for a little longer. No matter how we direct that scene, we have no control over the new twist that the next morning brings with it. So if you are like Vishal, you might still end up becoming Prashant and if you are Prashant, you might end up becoming Vishal. Watch the film with this perspective and you'll know what I mean.

We don't have the answers. Life has them.

That Four Letter Word is about the people we know so very well. Ourselves.

Since the film is just a scrapbook intended to trigger memories of your days at the crossroads of life, I urge the bitter critics of the film to tell me what they think is missing from what they ought to know.

Because, honestly, that would really help me while scripting my next film, something that I have been doing off late. As I do that, I'm tempted to design a "poster".

Review: Nishabd

2007-03-02T23:17:00.000+05:30

Lolly & Pop

When the 60-year old hero looks towards the open door, out of which his 18-year old object of affection has just run out of after expressing her love, we are left with a pretty photograph of his wife in her prime, framed on the wall right beside that door.

A few scenes later, when the shocked wife shuts the door on him literally, the fallen hero stands in the corridor, halfway between a door that’s shut and another that’s open, with the girl anxiously waiting inside. If only the rest of 'Nishabd' was as subtle.

But for these two scenes of individual brilliance and maybe the final monologue, there is very little in 'Nishabd' that bears the stamp of the master filmmaker.

Not only does he make 18-year old Jiah wear very little, Ram Gopal Varma also tells us very little about what led to the unlikely romance in the first place. Yes, we know they spent a day out in the estates, pretty much like ‘The Bridges of Madison County’ and all, with photographer Vijay (Bachchan) finding reason to sing again, thanks to the arrival of his daughter’s friend Jiah (Jiah Khan).

There are things we must be told. Like, what was the first conversation the old man ever had with the girl who is his daughter’s age. It begins on an interesting premise, with what could also be a one-line self-explanatory excuse for having shot the film the way he did, Varma makes the photographer say: “It is not necessary that the rest of the world sees it through my perspective.”

Brilliant. But, moments after that first line of serious conversation they’ve ever had, Varma decides it’s not important to tell us what they spoke about next. He increases the background score and shows them talking. Lazy screenwriting or weak direction?

What we see more of is a skimpy Jiah getting wet endlessly, pouting like a Playboy pin-up with her index finger in her mouth, and sometimes, with a lolly, perhaps the perfect metaphor for the entire romance.

The kid can’t act for nuts and even if her accent that swings from American to Australian does not distract, her favourite catch-phrase does. “Take light” sounds more like tapori-speak from ‘Rangeela’ than something that a sophisticatedly rich, foreign-raised brat would say. But then, like any teen who knows her pavement shopping in Dharavi, she also sports a hand-bag with big block letters: L-O-V-E.

No doubt Jiah is a pretty photogenic bombshell, but there is a difference between making her look innocently sensuous and professionally raunchy. While Vijay’s own photographs bring out that innocence of a teen having fun with a hose-pipe, Varma’s own frames throughout the film seem pretty distracted by her anatomy. It’s also another thing if Varma’s intention was to tell us that it was lust and physical attraction that led the old man into grey territory.

But he insists it is that purer emotion called love.

Full credit to Amitabh Bachchan’s finely sensitive portrayal of that angst of falling for his daughter’s friend. But Varma lets him down drastically, using silly jokes borrowed from SMS forwards as ice-beakers between the couple. And the more important conversations consist of her stilted dialogue delivery followed by long pauses and predictable monosyllabic answers from Vijay. If he wants us to understand their predicament, Varma ought to tell us more. The intensity of the romance appears watered down by weak screenwriting. As a result, the entire episode comes out looking like an old-man hopelessly infatuated by a teen with a juvenile crush on him.

Equally annoying is Varma’s way of hammering down what is implied and understood as he makes Jiah ask Vijay: “Do you like my spirit?” or her telling her best friend “I don’t recognise boundaries” during a tiff over her metaphorical ‘foul’ play during a game of badminton or Jiah asking Vijay: “What is black and white at the same time?” and actually making her say it: “Nothing.” Yes, yes, we got it in the first place, it is not radio-drama, Mr.Varma.

Revathy stands dignified in an otherwise sketchily etched out film, Bachchan emotes with all his heart and Nasser lends a little maturity to a support role. The camerawork (Amit Roy), probably intentionally quirky and at times lucidly metaphorical, only distracts an already wandering narrative. Amar Mohile’s score haunts, thanks to Vishal’s melody of ‘Rozana’ – the only song finds no place in the film.

Somehow everything seems too rushed up and hurried with unrealised, pregnant potential.

Or maybe, we are reading too much from a shallow script that might have worked just right for a 10-minute short.

The review I was waiting for...

2007-03-01T13:21:00.000+05:30

Not because it says the movie is really good. It doesn't. (Besides, we've had many other reviews where people've liked the film.)

This review is special because it is honest and well, critical.

Baddy does not know this but I had a sleepless night before the press show wondering what he was going to say.

Because, it is criticism from people you respect that always matters. I've said this before on many occasions, he is the best in the business. Raja is murderously good but Baddy's reviews are always more likeable given the down-to-earth tone he uses even while trashing a film. I didn't realise until someone (I think some disgruntled anonymous reader) pointed out recently that my reviews sound patronising. Point well taken.

So the morning of the press show, I went to bed at four and I just couldn't sleep till 6.30 a.m. And I had to be up by seven again to go check the projector.

You can quite imagine the anxiety when I landed up at the theatre to find out that the lip-sync was completely off. And, the picture quality was grainy. (Thankfully, we were able to fix all of that before the commerical release.)

Was he going to hate it?

I had never been more nervous all my life. It was like my favourite teacher had just taken my answer-paper and he was going to grade it in the next 91 minutes.

If he failed me, I knew I had to go back to school and learn everything I learnt all over again. Because, he's the teacher. He knows his stuff. He can't be wrong.

After the movie, when I was playing host to Vikram and attending to the NDTV crew, the only thing on my mind was what was Baddy going to say. Vikram was obviously nice and said he loved the movie, just like Suriya had said it earlier. And I was never sure if they meant it because stars are polite to everybody.

When Baddy came out of the hall smiling, it was a relief. More when he said, "I had a good time. It was okay. What do you mean it's a not bad film? It was really okay." He said he would talk to me about it at length. But, I wanted a progress report and see how many marks I got. I requested him if he can review it at leisure.

Within a week, he did. Thank you, Baddy.

:D

This gives me the courage to start on my next film. We're shooting in May.

Last two days!

2007-02-28T00:51:00.000+05:30

If you haven't seen it yet, here are your last two chances to catch it in the theatres. Thursday and Friday. 4.30 p.m.

We're still averaging about 85 per cent in terms of collections in five days though, in spite of having 'Eklavya' and 'Music and Lyrics' in the same slot as us.

Sathyam Cinemas had already committed to Warner Bros for The Departed for this week's release. Also, there's 'Ghost Rider' and Ram Gopal Varma's 'Nishabd' fighting for slots from Friday. Deepa Mehta's 'Water' is waiting in queue too but might not make it for this Friday.

So, they called me today to tell me that they are shifting TFLW to the weekend morning slot (That's so early that I'm sure no one in my target audience will bother waking up on the weekend but if you are an early riser, hey! You can still catch it during the weekend morning slot!)

For the rest of us normal regular people, it's the last two days to catch the movie. You can book your tickets by clicking the banner on the right of this page.

So there. Another classic example of how difficult it is for indie cinema to survive when big banners and studios are fighting for slots. We surely need more multiplexes, hopefully equipped with digital projection systems.

I should add here that Sathyam Cinemas has been extremely kind to us. They've given us all the marketing support we needed and valuable ad space. Thank you Supriya, Andy, Nandini, Valli, Ashwini, George, Chetan, Rajkumar, Bhavesh and of course Swaroop and Kiran! You guys have done your bit to support a small film in an industry dominated and dictated by studios.

We are in the process of finalising nation-wide release plans and I will have details shortly.

Still contemplating if we have the resources to do road shows across different cities and if it makes sense in the first place. Especially, because promotions for a theatrical release are so much effort and a lot of money. At the moment, it doesn't seem worth it for one week.

Besides, the revenue for independent cinema, in any case, is not from the box office. In fact, the box office accounts only for not even 5 per cent of the revenue potential.

The major revenue for independent films is from satellite and TV rights. And then, there's also DVD and video rights. Also, there's revenue potential from International rights that could turn out to be a bumper, before we finally put it up on the Internet.

People have been asking me about my next film and I wish I could start right away. But this whole distribution exercise is turning out to be an eye-opener. I got a call today from someone who wanted the film for South Africa. They hadn't even seen the film. She wanted to know how much I wanted for the film over phone, hardly a minute into the call. It sounded like a prank. It probably is. But, the point here is that there are so many markets around the world and so many places that we can reach simply because we've made this film in English. But it's time to put the channel in place.

What's the point of making another independent film without putting a system in place? I strongly believe that once we've established a proper channel and forge alliances with companies and agents around the world, we're in for a digital revolution.

Indie cinema can be industry by itself. We started out Made in Madras inkOperated! with the vision of making every first time filmmakers dream come true. Which means, if you have a script with fresh thought in it, an original idea, passion and conviction to make your film, we will produce your movie.

Alright, I don't want people mailing me starting today. So let me clarify, that's our vision for tomorrow. First, we need to take TFLW around the country.

And then, the world.

An insider's account

2007-02-27T16:40:00.000+05:30

My art director Incognito has put up a post on what the film means to her. Even on days we didn't have crew availability, we still had Incognito double up as First Assistant Director. I still remember we shot the game show scene with just the actor, the cinematographer, Incognito and her co-art director Preethi at Preethi's house. The girls have done a phenomenal job with a zero budget. Well, almost zero.

Thank you Incognito, thank you Preethi.

Review: Eklavya

2007-02-27T03:51:00.000+05:30

Catching you off guard

A chap called Abraham Maslow once said that as humans meet their basic needs, they seek to satisfy higher needs that occupy a set hierarchy – first, physiological, then safety and social needs, then esteem and finally self-actualisation.

If Vidhu Vinod Chopra’s ‘Eklavya’ is any indication, the man who gave us ‘Parinda,’ ‘1942 – A Love Story’ and ‘Mission Kashmir,’ seems to tell us that he’s done fulfilling all the first four needs including esteem.

Only a filmmaker who does not care a hoot to what anybody thinks about his films would set out to do something like ‘Eklavya’ – an exercise in self-actualisation. Quite understandably, given that his own protégés like Rajkumar Hirani and Pradeep Sarkar are today among the most esteemed filmmakers in the country.

Eklavya’s story goes that the dying queen Rani Suhasini Devi (Sharmila Tagore) utters the name of the royal guard Eklavya (Amitabh Bachchan) on her death-bed, much to the rage of the king Rana Jaivardhan (Boman Irani). The guard is the keeper of a secret about the birth of the queen’s children Harshvardhan (Saif Ali Khan) and Nandini (Raima Sen). As the queen dies, the stage is set for a drama that would’ve made Shakespeare smile.

Chopra’s ‘Eklavya’ is that legendary thumb a student of cinema would offer his masters, for everything that cinema has taught him. A fearless tribute to the spirit of filmmaking with all the right things. A Shakespearean script laden with heavy-duty drama (Duty also because it’s about the Royal Guard and his dharma), a top-notch ensemble ranging from stars to actors, indulgent story-telling and a world very painstakingly etched out with elaborate cinematography on a lavish canvas, with larger than life grandeur and opulence, stylishly edited and composed visually and aurally with great passion.

No surprise then that it is an expensive art film to make. But a filmmaker has to do his duty. His dharma is to tell a story without giving in to anybody’s diktats – not the stars’, not the market’s, not the critics’. The actors deliver. Every single one of them, in their limited roles.
Bachchan, of course, anchors the movie with great restraint and simmering intensity, with his eyes depicting his inner turmoil and steely resolve. Saif is splendidly effective in yet another serious role, holding his own against the veteran, with natural flair and underplayed majesty.

Cinematographer “Nutty” Subramanian’s camera makes the most of the huge cranes, giving us some of the most spectacularly framed visuals seen in recent times, with due credit to the locations and art director Nitin Chandrakant Desai. Chopra camp regular Shantanu Moitra turns in just one song and props up the rest of the film with a magnificent score to punctuate the visual poetry.

But then, this is also not the kind of parallel cinema associated with Ray, Benegal, Adoor or Nihalani. This is more of Tarantino-ish celebration of pop cinema and everything that we love about it with complete conviction, indulgence and John Woo-ish flamboyance.

So even if Chopra turns to Shakespeare for inspiration, he ensures that anything borrowed from the bard’s classic plot-devices wear his own signature – nods to elements from his own movies, cross-referencing, repeating old favourites and even a direct insert of a clip from ‘Parinda’. Chopra has made this movie for himself.

“Cinema has taken away my eyes,” he said in a recent interview. That’s also probably why we have Eklavya, the royal guard with failing eye-sight, discoursing on dharma and the need to do what is right. Chopra clearly believes he has done his duty and the right thing for Indian cinema.

Agreeing or disagreeing with the ending he provides is based on individual tastes but if Shakespeare was what he was aiming at, Eklavya falls just a little short because it just about shies away from the bloody final act that had all the potential to sign off with tragic irony and poetic pathos. Chopra, instead, plays it safe to settle for the classical “and-they-lived-happily-everafter” ending. Or again, maybe Shakespeare was just to adorn the quintessential Raja-Rani bedtime story about right and wrong.

Hence, you can’t help but get the feeling that commerce might have just got a little better of Chopra. The pre-release marketing sent out all the wrong signals. The slickly cut trailer promised a racy thriller. Big stars meant bigger theatres. The result has turned out to be disastrous at least as far as the crowd response goes. As the few first days in the halls have demonstrated, the restless crowds in the theatres aren’t exactly patient enough to appreciate the indulgence. It is really high time that theatres employed staff to escort people using mobile phones to the gate. At least, during films like these.

Eklavya is clearly an up-market multiplex film for a niche audience.

If you plan to go for a movie, take a rain check. For, you will find in Eklavya, the second most thrilling graphics sequence (next only to the Superstar's Baba 'kite' scene) when Bachchan, with his eyes closed, throws his dagger to snap the bells tied to the leg of a flying pigeon. Whistling and cheering might just disturb the rest of the crowd.

But, if you’re in the mood for serious cinema, make sure you just don’t miss it.

The Monday test!

2007-02-26T22:31:00.000+05:30

We passed it!!

95 seats today! YES!!

There were three seats booked until noon. And then 60 were sold till four. Exactly 70 at 4.20 p.m. for the 4.30 show. We finished at 95 seats today, that's a 65 per cent collection on a weekday. Even a mainstream film like Eklavya (finally saw it, review coming up soon) had only a 60 per cent collection for the matinee.

We had full houses during the weekend but the weekend is no indication really for how good a film is doing. Even bad films do well on the weekend. It's the Monday test that we were anxious about because on a Monday afternoon at Sathyam, you can get tickets to any movie you want. Which means, 95 people chose to watch That Four Letter Word over 'Ekalavya' and 'Music and Lyrics.'

So there it is, we passed the test. That makes it a 87 per cent opening for the first four days. Thank you everybody who's seen and supported this small little film about regular people, their ordinary lives and their ordinary dreams.

You've just given the courage to many young filmmakers to go ahead and make their own movie. Do spread the word. Tell people how you found the film. I'll link even the bad reviews as long as they don't contain spoilers. Here's one that calls it an average film. It probably is. Or, maybe it is a bad film. Maybe, I don't know. You tell me. And tell me why. Like my favourite critic writes in his latest post on reviewing:

"What I try to do is write about why I felt about a film the way I did. If I liked it – why? And if I didn’t like it – why not?"

Oops, before I forget, Congratulations on the Indiebloggie, Baddy!

You guys have read many reviews/blogs that have said nice things and I think that's the problem. You have great expectations from someone who's made his first film with four lakh rupees and 18 days of shoot. But thank you for that faith.

I'm thrilled with the way Madras has responded. Independent cinema and indie filmmakers have reason to celebrate.

TFLW for dummies!

2007-02-26T13:52:00.000+05:30

When a filmmaker makes a movie, there are parts he spoonfeeds and underlines, just to make sure the audience gets it. A movie is a movie at the end of the day, you watch it to entertain you.

And there are parts of the film, a filmmaker makes for himself and for those who love cinema. Cinema, of course, is not always a part of the movie. Usually, the more commercial it gets, the more it is manufactured for the lowest common denominator and sometimes, dumbing down happens at the expense of the cinema in the movie.

So when I made TFLW, there are parts I made for the lowest common denominator of my already niche target audience. The youth at the crossroads of life. I had to throw in a few laughs to balance out the serious introspective content of the film. That Four Letter Word was not written as a comedy. It is a light-hearted feel good coming of age film. Those who walked in expecting that, did end up liking it. So it is indeed pleasing that the target audience has recieved it well. We've had a phenomenal opening for an independent film. And the audience response in the theatres, especially during the climax, is reason to celebrate. It's working.

And then, there are parts of the film we designed for who like their cinema. The types who analyse films and appreciate the finer aspects of filmmaking. That is the aspect that's largely gone unnoticed. This post will just talk about some things we did with the film that many didn't notice.

Susan came up with a fairly balanced review, but for the wordage skewing in favour of what's wrong with it. But it's also probably because my newspaper does not want to be seen promoting its own employee.

Since she brought it up, I think I must start with the secret behind the film’s colour scheme. No, it's not about Wohoo! See what we can do with digital technology! It's because the film needed that feel.

The film was designed as a bridge between life and film. (The tagline goes: Boy meets girl. Fact meets fiction. Reality meets fantasy. Life meets film).

Everything one should know about the film is right there.

‘Boy meets girl’ is your typical romance genre.

It is ‘Fact meets fiction,’ for obvious reasons. It's borrowed from life and exaggerated (hence the comic book technique to alienate and facilitate a willing suspension of disbelief and to establish right at the beginning that you are not going to know too much about these guys apart from what you need to know)

Reality meets fantasy is that journey the characters make from dreaming to actually going and getting it.

This is based on real people alright, but is clearly not a docu-drama. It is all about elements borrowed from life meeting elements that happen only in film.

The film tries to build a bridge between dreams and reality, between the boy and the girl (we specifically leave her mysterious till the end so that anyone watching that movie from Sunil's shoes can fill in his dream girl in that blank we've created.)

So if you try to represent life, what are the techniques you would use cinematically? Hand-held camera, surely. What else? Hidden cameras (candid camera like we used for the car), CCTV (the voyueristic camera in Zebra's room, at the beach during the six minute scene)... Did you realise that CCTV footage is black n white?

When you try to represent film or what is larger than life, cinematically, you tend to use saturated colours to create a sense of alienation and manufacture willing suspension of disbelief. What are the other colour schemes that films provide us? The immediate connect would be the black n white Chaplinsque feel.

So when you build a bridge between dreams and reality, fact and fiction, life and film, you deem it fit to cinematically represent that bridge through a colour scheme that represents elements from both life and film. So the film tends from reality to fantasy, using another colour scheme associated with surrealism. We chose blue to create that surreal feel and complete that palette that ranged from black n white of video (that represents life) to scratched black n white film (that represents film).

At another level, films are about fulfilling your fantasies. Most of us go to the movies to see the hero win, to see the boy get the girl, to see good triumph over evil because these things don't often happen in life. We like the escape films provide from reality. In TFLW, the characters have the same problems you do (and hence the realistic texture and treatment when they are having their talk, the camera is voyeuristic and non-intrusive, like a surviellance camera) but the reason they go to the movies is for the gratification of their dream and the escape films provide us (and hence the larger than life texture and treatment towards the end of the film, the scratched black n white film and the comic interludes... the chase in the end) and the Super-imposed text in the end tying up everything that the film stands for. That Four Letter Word: Life. The text in the end roots it back to your reality, spells out how movies are different from life itself.

Our writer friend (I can't call the kid a critic, at least, not from that "review") from New Indian Express displays her intelligence and phenomenal talent by observing: "As Sudhish himself admits at the end of the film that these things did not happen to people in real life." Her IQ clearly is a notch higher than someone else from her paper who reviewed 'The Inside Man' with a brilliant punchline, after raping the Spike Lee flick. Oh, the famous last words of that review went: "Who was the inside man anyway?"

Sorry, I digress.

That Four Letter Word, Life, is always full of those moments. The real, the surreal and the larger than life. We carefully picked scenes that represented these elements and painted them with the colour code from our palette of black n white, blue sepia, colours, saturated colours, burnt out colours and scratched black n white film.

All romance movies are about boy getting girl. We used the classic coming of age setting for this love story/stories of the lead guys, created willing suspension of disbelief with the comic book feel and then went on the life-meets-film trip.

We knew not everyone would understand but this was only for those who liked the cinema in the movie. We had to use this palette to be true to the spirit of our narrative.

That's why this is independent cinema. We tell stories that we want to tell, in a way we want to tell and to an audience we want to talk to.

That's also how it differs from mainstream cinema that caters to a mass. That's also why this is a multiplex film, a niche film, intended for a specific audience.

The screenplay's depth and how much we wanted to tell you about the characters too, was by design. We didn't want to give them surnames because we didn't want to get into their ethnic backgrounds. We wanted to keep it as general and as global as possible and that's exactly why we use the additional comic book narrator. A comic book will tell you Superman flies with a blue cape sporting his underwear outside without bothering to tell you why he does so. Because, it's a comic book and it shouldn't be taken seriously.

The events were made to look random to give it that feel of life in itself. The drag race was to illustrate that Prashant has tried to talk to Vishal before but Vishal being the guy who lives by the moment, is more interested in the challenge the moment presented him with, rather than the one posed by life itself.

And we had to show Prashant make at least one attempt to talk to Vishal before that huge six minute conversation right in the middle of the film (the scene for introspection, as Sunil calls it, the scene that defines the film... that scene that IS what the whole film is about).

Basically, if these guys have been friends all along, why didn't Prashant tell Vishal what he did during that scene in all these years that they had been friends?

Because, Vishal wouldn’t listen, he would race or do something else that the moment had in store. The race was to establish that equation. Vishal would always have an answer. He would just ask him to calm down and chill, like he did at the pool table.

Prashant is the voice of reason, the personification of mind. Vishal is all heart and just cannot relate to the way Prashant lives his life.

That's also why Prashant figures that what he has to tell Vishal, he can only tell by addressing Sunil. So when Prashant tells Sunil, he's not expecting a drama King like Sunil to listen, what he tells him is actually directed at Vishal. And Vishal understands that, which is why he shoots back at Prashant and talks in defence of Sunil.

The nuances are all there, maybe our critics aren’t equipped adequately to understand that cinema is all about the sub-text (What you don’t tell but show or insinuate). Every scene is there in the film for a reason. We would've rewritten the script over a thousand times in five years before we shot this version. And hey, we're in the select club of filmmakers who actually use a bound script.

I urge these critics to watch the movie again [especially, since they didn't have to pay the first time around :)], with an open mind. What I mean by an open mind is: Don't go in trying to like the film or hate the film... just take it one scene at a time.

And kid, remember what Uncle Ben told Peter Parker: "With great power comes great responsibility."

Independent cinema needs an open mind. Not an empty head.

Independent filmmakers, unlike other filmmakers, put in their own money to make their film, without the backing of corporates or sponsors or studios, out of their love and passion for cinema.

Like Kamal Hassan once told me, "If you don't give the first man the courage to do something different, why will another even try?"

I'm glad the film is working with the audience.

I also hope this will soon prove that: If I can make a movie, anyone can.

Things you didn't know about That Four Letter Word

2007-02-25T07:11:00.000+05:30

1. We finished shooting 90 per cent of the film in one stretch of 12 days. We shot in all for about 18 days (including reshoots and patchwork) and not years as many people think.

2. TFLW was written in 1999 as Made in Madras, as a Tanglish film. But given the scope and the universality of the theme, the producer suggested we keep it global and stick to English.

3. The script was written over email. Murugan was in the US and he would rewrite most of the lines I wrote. He’s the best rewriter. And yes, I’m the better writer.

4. Purab Kohli was originally supposed to play Vishal. But because he was shooting for Supari and unavailable, he told me that Cary would fit the role better.

5. We first shot a trailer for TFLW in February 2002 at Pune, thanks to Abhishek Shah and Symbiosis Institute of Mass Communication. The film then starred MTV VJ Cyrus Sahukar, Channel V VJs Cary Edwards and Ranvir Shorey, my buddy from college Pradyumna Singh Chauhan, my college junior Usha (who then went on to become a VJ) and a friend who later went on to join Radio Mirchi and came to be known as Mirchi Suchi.

6. Early July 2002, Cyrus Sahukar backed out two weeks before shoot saying he wasn’t getting leave. It was only a month ago that I had met Abbas during the press show of his Hindi film debut. It was so bad that in the interval, he was all shook up. We drove to a friend’s place during the break and I showed him the trailer. He had loved it. So I called Abbas. He said he would check dates and call me back. Two minutes later, he said he was in. We met one hour later and had a six hour long meeting when I narrated him the script and gave him a copy. He then told me how he had secretly wished he was part of the film when he saw the trailer. So Abbas was in, Sahukar out.

7. Ranvir Shorey became busy with his play Blue Mug and wasn’t available for the shoot. And we were convinced no one else can play the role but him or Cyrus Broacha. A guy sitting next table at Qwikys walked up to us after eavesdropping into our conversation and gave us Cyrus Broacha’s number. We called Broacha religiously for a week before we found him at home. He liked the role, promised us dates in what turned out to be the busiest month of his career. During that month, he hosted the UN AIDS conference at Barcelona and shared stage with the then US President Clinton and had to rush to Dubai for the Chotta VJ Hunt. After 10 days of shoot, we still didn’t hear from Broacha. We had made frantic random calls to all major hotels in Spain from the Iway opposite Residency Towers to trace him. We had scheduled his shoot on day 12. On day 11, we took a break and went for ‘Bend it like Beckham.’ During the interval, Cary suggested we call Ranvir and check. It seemed like a ridiculous idea because Ranvir was upset with us because we couldn’t wait till he finished his Blue Mug schedule. Besides, Ranvir did tell us that he didn’t have leave left and Channel V would not give him anymore leave. But we didn’t have any other option for Zebra, so we called him. Two days later, he flew into Madras and completed his role in five days. It just happened that he had resigned from Channel V merely two days before we called him. Life.

8. All the outdoors of the first version of TFLW were shot in Manipal because we wanted a university town feel. We even got fancy number-plates done that said TFLW 01, TFLW 02 and so on…

9. About 95 per cent of the film was ready and complete as per schedule but due date hassles with our stars, we couldn’t get all of them to come to Madras at the same time. Pradyumna had injured his knee so badly that his physio banned him from any sort of exertion. He underwent physiotherapy for nearly six months in Madras. Meanwhile, Suchitra became Mirchi Suchi and didn’t get leave. So we waited for the stars to give us dates.

10. The producer’s little daughter had a little tumour in her brain. So he had to shift to the US and we put the project on hold for a while.

11. Mid 2004, we decided we were going to reshoot the film because we didn’t like it. We studied it extensively and realised that the fundamental problem was with the script. The 144 page long script had resulted in 136 minutes of talking spread over 72 scenes. It was like a radio play because the actors said everything and there was hardly any visual subtext. We figured we had to make it racy. The new script was 106 scenes in 90 pages. We decided we can’t bother the producer. So Abbas took charge as Executive Producer and we entrusted him with the responsibility of getting funding.

12. In November 2004, a couple of my friends got together and decided to make a movie. Three months later, they had a movie. It was a no-budget movie called ‘I just don’t get it.’ It was about two guys making a movie without any money. Due to a few technical glitches and a redundant screenplay, they decided not to do anything with the film. But I was inspired. If these two guys can go around and make their dream come true in three months, it’s high time I did something after sitting on my ass for five years. In January, I told Abbas that we should shoot with whatever resources we had. He wanted time because his marketing guy wanted two more weeks to get the cheques from corporates. We had had no luck in over six months, but we gave him time till mid February. Mid Feb, he asked for one more month, we agreed and told him that we will start shoot on March 15, no matter what happened. We had two plans. How we would shoot with money. And how we would without it. Early March, Abbas gave up on trying to find sponsors. Meanwhile, we got everything ready for shooting with available resources. First day of shoot was on March 16 at the British Council. We had a two day break before we resumed shoot on March 19.

13. After about four days of shoot, on March 23, Abbas and me had to part ways because of creative differences. It was a painful decision to make because Usha had to leave to the US on April 13 and wasn’t coming back for at least 8 months. Parting ways meant we had to reshoot everything and lose quite a bit. Abbas brought with him Shakti, a replacement for Pradyumna, an experienced cinematographer in Rajesh Datar, free food from his friends in Gallopin Gooseberry and free cameras provided to us by Panasonic. So in less than 48 hours, we recast and regrouped to catch up with the schedule. Aashil, who works with IBM Bangalore, sent me the Sprite ad he had done, over email. I instantly knew he could play Sunil. Thanks to Vijay for recommending him, Aashil is a natural. He’s brilliant. Watch him in TFLW and you are bound to like him.

14. The evening before Aashil was supposed to land in Chennai for the first day of the shoot (our third attempt to shoot the movie and second within a week), my grand-dad died. My folks had to leave town but Mom left me her ATM card. She said: “Go ahead, make your movie. He’s dead and gone anyway.” Thank you Mom, because if we hadn’t started the film that day, we wouldn’t have finished shoot before Usha had to leave to the US. And we wouldn’t have released the movie by now.

15. Prashant was cast one and a half hours before his first scene. We had auditioned over 20 people that day and had given up hope. And, Praveen got it right the first time. Praveen was the fourth guy to play Prashant after Pradyumna, Shakti and Tejas. We've shot Scene No.55, the drag race scene 4 times in all, with different actors. Oh yes, Tejas was an actor who ran away after one day of shoot because he wanted to spend time with his girlfriend. And he disappeared without telling us and we were left guessing for two days. Extremely unprofessional fellow, this Tejas. Praveen was the exact opposite. What he lacked by talent, he made up with hard work, dedication and discipline. He puts in a lot of work and it is not easy for a young theatre actor used to saying his lines out loud to underplay.

16. The climax scene was shot on April 1. We needed 20 cars to create a traffic jam on New years eve. But people didn’t show up thinking it was an April Fools joke. We had all of seven cars that night. But we had to go ahead and finish shoot.

17. We finished shoot on April 4. And Vijay edited 25 minutes of the film featuring Usha by April 8, just so that she could dub and leave to the US. And she did. It was all per plan.

18. The Editing was jinxed too. Vijay was editing the film at home on his computer. He lost all the data, everything he had edited, including the 25 minutes we had completed of Usha, when his system crashed. Finally, we had no choice but to move to a professional editing suite. Pradeep, my very first assistant director, had gone on to become a producer with SS Music and later Marketing head and Kosmic Studio. He got us a good deal at Kosmic and we got Vijay to come and edit in a professional set up.

19. Editing took a lot of time. Editing the same footage the second time around could be a pain. Ask any editor, he’ll refuse to do it. The colour correction was done at Vijay’s own new studio AgNO3. (Coming soon: The post explaining the colour palette used in the film, something that our critics just didn't get!)

20. Vijay studied film at Vancouver Film School. Vijay and Pradeep were the guys who made ‘I just don’t get it’. The guys who inspired me to go ahead and make my film no matter what. Pradeep did the cinematography for the final schedule of four days.

21. For the scene where Prashant teaches Sara to drive, both actors Praveen and Paloma didn’t know to drive. The scene required them to almost bang into the car. It was a difficult scene to shoot only because out of the four people who would be in the car (Praveen, Paloma, Pradeep and me), only the guy holding the camera knew to drive. So he was instructing Praveen and Paloma how to drive, while shooting. Frustrated with Praveen not looking scared enough while acting, Pradeep kept the camera on the steering and drove recklessly (while shooting at the same time) just to make the fear look real. In the process, he ended up actually banging the car. We’ve used that shot in the film. The car he banged was our camera unit car. Oh wait, the best part is that the car we were driving was Pradeep’s.

22. At the editing table, after showing it to a different sets of people from the target group, we cut down nearly 14 pages (Amounting to nine minutes from the 100 minute Director's Cut).
The TFLW DVD will have not just these deleted scenes but also the entire movie we trashed. I still personally like many scenes from the old version. Too bad we couldn't finish it. But this version is infinitely better.

100 minutes before the first day first show!

2007-02-23T14:25:00.000+05:30

The moment of truth is just a few minutes away. The ultimate test for a movie. How will the audience react? I'm going to be there to see it for myself. Unlike a huge Sathyam or Devi hall which has about a 1000 seats, Studio 5 has only 148. I should be able to hear the whispers, the snide remarks, the snores and even the slightest hints of annoyance.

That sort makes me a little curious but no, I'm not nervous anymore. To be honest, I was absolutely nervous the night of the press show. I went to bed at four. But I just couldn't sleep. I was wide awake till 6.30. I had set my alarm for 7 because I had to be up and reach the theatre by 9 to check the projector installation.

Managed about half an hour of sleep, got to the venue to get the shock of my life. The print wasn't even half as good as it was at the festival premiere.

I had prepared things to say to introduce the film but the picture quality completely threw me off gear. My blood pressure shot up and I was wide awake, almost a nervous wreck.

But thanks to the efficient people at Real Image, we were able to fix the mysterious lip sync problem that surfaced last minute. The picture quality was terrible but people who showed up just blamed that on the low budget production values.

After about 20 minutes into the film, I could finally relax because not only had I forgotten about the bad picture quality, the audience behind (the college crowd) seemed to be having a good time. They were laughing at regular intervals. At least at the places I was hoping they would.

Vikram was kind enough to make it though he had a late night shoot. Sanjay Pinto was sweet enough to send the crew from NDTV. Sashi, my original producer, finally got to see it on the big screen.

And as expected, we only heard only nice things. Obviously, people who come for your special show aren't going to be mean to you on your face.

Anyway, NDTV did a story on us and it appeared yesterday. It made it to the top 10 stories of the day and will be featured at 6.30 this evening. So do watch out for that. Vikram too said nice things about the film. He loved the dialogues and the natural flow of the screenplay.

Ganesh and his friends seem to relate to the movie. That is very heartening because the film was made for exactly that kind of an audience. People at the crossroads of their life.

Then, yesterday, we got our first negative review from this blogger who wanted to like the movie but ultimately thought it sucked. I don't know how old this guy is, but I hope and pray he's not in college or just out of it. If he is, I should probably take his opinion a little seriously. Else, there is nothing to worry about because we don't actually expect people outside our target group to like it. Like he says, it is about ordinary people mouthing very ordinary or bad lines. What if, THAT *exactly* was the idea of the film? Hmmm!

There was another one that came out today in the New Indian Express. The writer sounds like the age group I'm talking about. So, I respect her opinion, if not her "review". Without quite intending to, she gives us the biggest compliment when she says it does not look like there was a script in the first place.

Again, what if THAT *exactly* was the idea of the film? Hmmm! Though it is tempting to link the story to showcase her opinion on the film, I don't want to because it contains spoilers. (It's high time they taught that in school along with the other basics of criticism: Thou Shalt Not Give Away Spoilers!) .

I'm not sure how many people know that a tagline usually tells you what to expect from a film.

So here it goes: "Boy meets girl. Fact meets fiction. Reality meets fantasy. Life meets film."

Hence, there is a possibility that the film was designed and structured to blend life with film. So maybe when we give you a film that's as random as life and about ordinary people, you shouldn't be expecting to see anything more or less.

For all the films I ripped apart when I was little, maybe this is poetic justice. As they say, what goes around, comes around.

I think these bad "reviews" (more like opinions) are a good thing because they are putting things in perspective. They provide a balance for all the nice things people have had to say all along. So it's all cool really. It probably will do a lot of good to bring down the hype. With great hype comes great expectations. So all you people heading to watch this movie, remember, this is a small film. This is a debut film. This is a 5 on 10 film, a "not bad" film. A lot of people have liked it. Some haven't. Those who came with an open mind have liked it. Those who came with preset notions, clearly haven't.

The good news for me is that we've managed to fix the picture quality and get back the old print by noon today. That's such a relief because it was the technical quality I was really worried about. Finally, got some time to breathe. I'm increasingly convinced about the content of the film with every passing day, seeing the positive response it has generated from people who matter.

Just another hour to go, so I'm off to the theatre.

And hey, you can book your tickets here. :D

Wednesday morning 10.15 a.m.

2007-02-19T21:36:00.000+05:30

That image, at Six Degrees on February 21, will be followed by 91 minutes 13 seconds of the movie that's been part of about 25 per cent of my entire lifetime and probably all my youth.

It is a special preview show for the media and opinion leaders. Do give me a call at 9382118103 and book yourself a seat if you feel left out. Else, we have the commercial release on February 23. And, you can contribute to the cause of independent cinema and buy your own tickets.

:D

The girls on SS Music

2007-02-14T02:21:00.000+05:30

This clip is from Southern Spice Music. The SS Music team was there to cover the premiere at the Chennai International Film Festival. Here's what Usha, Paloma, Suriya and Srikanth had to say to them.

Bytes from the premiere - 1

2007-02-10T11:00:00.000+05:30

This was at the premiere of my film at the Chennai International Film Festival on December 21. A quick look at what Suriya had to say along with my bytes on the film. Thank you, Times Now, for the footage.

Will post clips acquired from Galatta and SS Music during the week.

Another Evam play this weekend!

2007-02-10T03:57:00.000+05:30

If you haven't seen Oh God yet, this is your chance. This hilarious farce comes alive at Sivagami Pethachi auditorium on Saturday (7.15) and Sunday (3.15 and 7.15).

Here's a review I wrote when it last played a coupla weeks ago.

One of my favourite actors from That Four Letter Word has come up with such an adorable performance in this play, you guys just got to watch it.

And if you are God-fearing and don't like the idea of a spoof on the Holy book, father, son or spirit, stay home.

That Four Letter Word from February 23

2007-02-07T00:22:00.000+05:30

I had been postponing putting up the trailer because we didn't know when the exact date of release was going to be. And, to be honest, my editor's been busy as hell trying to make his film and I didn't want to bother him.

Now, that it is official, what you see above is a trailer I cut, with my limited editing skills and resources (on my laptop). Working on a low budget film, you really can't always afford the luxury of a studio.

So yes, please go ahead, feel free to post it in your blog and organise mass spamming through email, groups and communities across networking portals. I just checked Orkut and realised: That Four Letter Word community already has 98 members. If you are not yet part of it, you can join the gang here.

I don't care if you rubbish it but do let people know that there's a movie called That Four Letter Word that will release in Studio 5, slotted for the daily Four O Clock show.

If you are new to this blog, you can read some of the early reviews and reactions to the film here.

If you are a regular here, well, this is the first in the series of videos and posts that I had saved up for the pre-release buzz. So do come back for more. I will be posting videos including scenes from the film, celebrity responses and also resume blogging on the making of the film, something that I had to suspend to complete the making.

Now that it's all done and set, I finally have the time (barely, given that the release is just two weeks away) to make some noise on the film.

Given that it is a low-budget independent film, That Four Letter Word, solely relies on the word of mouth generated by people like you. So please watch the movie. You should be able to book tickets from the blog shortly, I'm talking to Sathyam Cinemas to see how we can work that out. Else, please head to www.thecinema.in anytime around Valentines to book your seats.

I'm nervous and excited. Too many things, too little time. Not found time to work on the website yet. Just finished trailer after a non-stop marathon 15 hour editing session that started at ten last night and ended at 2.30 this afternoon. Hardly got three hours of sleep.

After numerous attempts trying to upload the trailer on to Youtube, finally some luck.

Next, I have to sit on getting posters and publicity materials ready. Then, the website and then if I have the time, the book on the Making of TFLW.

In between all this, I need to generate some sort of media buzz. So if you do know journalists or are one, please make them consider/consider writing about a movie made with four lakhs, after seven years of effort and two and a half attempts. After all, it's not everyday that an independent film gets made in India, shot with a digital MiniDV camera, without the backing of studios or stars and actually makes it to the theatres. The film will release in most metros in the country after finishing the rounds in Studio 5. Else, you can catch it on the internet this summer or on TV shortly after that.

If this works, anybody will be able to make a movie and find an audience. For a market to emerge, we need to cultivate it. Support indie cinema. Support fresh thought.

This Valentine's season, spread the word.

That Four Letter Word.

Evam's Odd Couple

2007-02-03T15:46:00.000+05:30

A HILARIOUS COMEDY about 2 OPPOSITES!

Directed by evam

Written By: Neil Simon

Produced and designed by: evam

LAST 3 SHOWS at Sivagami pethachi auditorium , Luz Church Rd , Alwarpet
(near isabella hospital, near old lifestyle)

On 03 FEB 2007- 7.15 PM
On 04 Feb 2007- 3.30 pm and 7.15 pm

BOOK TICKETS simply at www.evam.in or call 9840222363 / 9840612333 or Call 42244224 for door delivery

Starring: Karthik Srinivasan, Karthik Kumar, Anuradha Ananth, Kalyani Kumar, Sarvesh Sridhar, Navin Balalacahnder,Shankar Ramachandran and Sunil Vishnu K

Duration: 110 minutes

The Plot

Two divorced men decide to share a New York apartment. That’s the premise of The Odd Couple by evam……
Felix and Oscar are an extremely odd couple: Felix is neurotic, precise, and fastidiously clean. Oscar, on the other hand, is the exact opposite: sloppy and casual. What happens when the two friends are forced to share an apartment, and their differing lifestyles inevitably lead to conflicts- a full laugh riot for the audiences. Add to that their Saturday night poker gang friends: Vinnie- the dutiful husband, Murray- the cop, Roy-Oscar’s accountant and the sarcastic Speed , and the possibility of a date with the Cuckoo Pigeon sisters who live in the same apartment- you’ve got a chaotic entertainer for sure!

This Neil Simon situational comedy on one hand is about two opposite people (out of their marriages) deciding to stay together and the chaos and humour which is generated as a result, while on the other hand the story is about friendship, and loneliness -- it gives us a glimpse into what makes us cling on to our friends even when they are so opposite to us and can drive us over the wall with their antics -- the uncanny bond, which makes friendship such an odd-even relationship! Somewhere it also touches about how easy it is to lose people and how difficult to stay on and make things work -- and sometimes you don’t get a choice at all!

A perfect Stress Buster for THE AUDIENCE-hilarious fun!

Reviews:
“In evam's hands it was two hours of mirthful laughter for the audience. The play's success goes beyond even the direction to the two main characters. Their timing was perfect and they played with changing the pace, with pauses, with sulks and silences. they presented an interesting variety, a group made up of very different individuals...
- The Hindu

No, that was not my review.
I'm yet to watch it and hope to catch it during the weekend.

On heroes, destiny and co-incidence

2007-01-31T01:43:00.000+05:30

I'm not sure if it's a co-incidence that the last three things I saw with my buddy D turned out to be about heroes and what they are made of.

Hollywoodland:

Based on the true story of George Reeves, the guy who played Superman and shot himself, the film examines a very basic question, which incidentally, also turned out to be the starting point for my own That Four Letter Word: What do we want from the rest of our lives?

The guy everybody likes to watch on TV, George (Ben Affleck), does not want to play Superman ("I look like a damned fool," he says seeing himself in costume, later wondering: "You can't see my penis, can you?"). He wanted to be a real actor. He would chase this dream to no end. But the big question was: Was he capable of being a great actor?

The guy investigating his death, Simo Louis (a fictional character created by cinematic licence played by Adrian Brody) the guy who watches over people's lives, wants to be the greatest detective. But the big question was: Was he capable of being a great detective?

We all want to be heroes, don't we? But were we meant to be? Do we have it in us? How do we know unless we've tried? When and where do we stop?

These questions fascinate me. Because, these in many ways, captures our deepest insecurities and fears. With two weeks for release, I keep telling myself: If I don't turn out to be a decent filmmaker, I'm not quitting till I become one. I'm raring to go with my second.

Anyways, the next film I saw right after Hollywoodland was:

Flags of our Fathers:

This one's puts heroes under the microscope. Do real heroes see themselves as heroes? What makes them heroes? Did they start out trying to be heroes or did a set of incidents put them on a pedestal?

Clint Eastwood delves deep into the minds of a bunch of unlikely heroes -- American soldiers who shot to fame because a photograph of them hoisting a flag in enemy territory made it to the headlines.

Thanks to a picture, people perceived them as heroes but these are guys who've been traumatized by the war, seen their friends die and fought hard to stay alive. The fact that they were being celebrated when many of their friends died sudden explosive deaths doesn't help that trauma.

As the son of one of these heroes later says in the movie:

"I finally came to the conclusion that maybe he was right, maybe there are no such things as heroes, maybe there are just people like my dad. I finally came to understand why they were so uncomfortable being called heroes. Heroes are something we create, something we need. It's a way for us to understand what is almost incomprehensible, how people could sacrifice so much for us? But for my dad and these men, the risks they took, the wounds they suffered, they did that for their buddies. They may have fought for their country but they died for their friends. For the man in front, for the man beside him, and if we wish to truly honor these men we should remember them the way they really were. The way my dad remembered them. "

I can't wait to see Eastwood's take on the Japanese side of the war, 'Letters from Iwo Jima.'

If 'Flags of our Fathers' got two Oscar nominations for the year and 'Letters from Iwo Jima' has got him four nominations including Best Director, Best Picture and Best Screenplay this year. You can imagine my excitement.

I saw the first two movies last night. Tonight, in the middle of my colour correction (yes, I did manage to brighten up a couple of scenes which people found dark in That Four Letter Word), I watched:

Heroes:

It's a new TV series D downloaded off the net because he heard a lot of good things about it.

After watching the pilot, I'm hooked. It's super promising if you are a comic book lover and also if you like what the film versions have done with Spidey and X-Men: Exploring the human side of heroes.

The reason for the post is because somewhere in the middle as one of the key characters Mohinder (supposed to be from Madras of all places) tells his class in University of Madras (wearing a suit and all, speaking to sethji type extras):

"Man is a narcissistic species by nature. We have colonized the four corners of our tiny planet. But we are not the pinnacle of so-called evolution. That honor belongs to the lowly cockroach. Capable of living for months without food. Remaining alive headless for weeks at a time. Resistant to radiation. If God has indeed created Himself in His own image, then I submit to you that God is a cockroach. They say that man uses only a tenth of his brain power. Another percent, and we might actually be worthy of God's image. Unless, of course, that day has already arrived. The Human Genome Project has discovered that tiny variations in man's genetic code are taking place at increasingly rapid rates. Teleportation, levitation, tissue re-generation. Is this outside the realm of possibility? Or is man entering a new gateway to evolution? Is he finally standing at the threshold to true human potential?"

Soon, we find him getting profound:

"Where does it come from, this quest? This need to solve life's mysteries, when the simplest of questions can never be answered. Why are we here? What is the soul? Why do we dream? Perhaps we'd be better off not looking at all. Not doubting, not yearning. That's not human nature. Not the human heart. That is not why we are here."

And a coupla scenes later, he has this for an answer:

"Some individuals, it is true, are more special. This is natural selection. It begins as a single individual born or hatched like every other member of their species. Anonymous. Seemingly ordinary. Except they're not. They carry inside them the genetic code that will take their species to the next evolutionary rung. It's destiny."

Now, is there anything at all called co-incidence?

Oh, yes, it does seem like one big co-incidence that I've been watching movies/TV series about heroes. And, I just remembered that in a few hours from now, I have to go for the press preview of 'Rocky Balboa'!

To wrap up this post on heroes, their insecurities and the need to keep fighting, I leave you with the punchline from Syl Stallone (from Rocky Balboa):

"Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It is a very mean and nasty place and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't how hard you hit; it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward. How much you can take, and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done. Now, if you know what you're worth, then go out and get what you're worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hit, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you are because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain't you. You're better than that!"

Salaam E Ishq: First take

2007-01-26T14:08:00.000+05:30

Watching Saalam E Ishq is like trying to eat a jumbo-sized Mushroom-Cheese-Corn Burger, with a lot of masala for flavour.

First, be warned that you need a huge appetite to do finish it.

Besides, you need to be able to digest huge amounts of mush, cheese and corn - the staple diet of Hindi cinema lovers.

So if you're looking at it as a meal for two, it is the perfect date. It is long enough for you to get cozy, get to know the characters and catch up with their lives, share a laugh with them, relate to the issues of love and commitment and see them find themselves and in a way, yourself in them.

If you are going in a gang, like I did, it could spell disaster. Your friends are likely to ruin it for you with their impatience and restlessness. More so, if they are single.

First, things to consider while booking a ticket to Hindi movie, especially, if its running time is known to be 200 plus minutes at least:

Why bother if you don't have the patience to sit through four hours? Did Nikhil Advani personally insist with you that you catch it asap? Don't all promos suggest that it atleast, structurally, resembles "Love Actually"? Then, why go for it if you don't have the tolerance for a desi take on it?

Maybe it is time to get over your Hollywood fixation, at least while watching our cinema.

It's not like Hollywood is all original anyway. 'The Departed' was among the best last year by one of their best directors but see 'Infernal Affairs' and you'll see even the master rips off scenes, lines and even shots.

BTW, I still love 'The Departed' for the language, attitude and energy with Scorcese adding value to an already explosive script. That's exactly what Nikhil Advani does here too.

He adds plenty of value and roots many Hollywood script-devices in the Indian mainstream genre. And in a way that you can barely find any resemblances with the original source of inspiration. Unlike, The Departed.

Since I knew just what to expect here, I wasn't let down at all.

I loved every bit of the film.

Even the bits when it just dragged and dragged and dragged towards the end, with the mandatory pathos song in the end in no mood to end, inter-cutting between the climax for each story in what is the among the longest Last Acts seen on screen. (Everytime the song re-started, the crowd went Ohhhhh No! I, on the other hand, didn't want it to end!)

Yes, Saalam E Ishq borrows plots from Hollywood romantic comedies quite liberally, but infuses it with what is at the heart of Hindi cinema: A sense of sentimentality that nobody in the world does better than us. And it does this across the vibrant spectrum of desi characters: starting from an old-fashioned God-fearing/trusting taxi driver (Govinda) waiting for his 'Dreamgirl' to the new-age post DCH Indian commitment-phobic single male (Akshaye plays Akash this time) who develops cold feet before his wedding (with Ayesha Takia), from a flashy item queen (Priyanka), faking a romance with a mysterious Rahul (Salman), desperate for a change in image to a sober forty-year old (Anil Kapoor married to Juhi) nursing a crush on someone half his ag and from a happily married couple (John and Vidya) whose world is shattered by an accident to another 'Just Married' couple (Sohail and Isha) whose honeymoon is jinxed and kabab is filled with haddis.

In between all the light-hearted moments, feel-good and irreverence, Nikhil shows his brilliance and mastery over the craft, the true test for any Hindi cinema filmmaker, with his control over melodrama, punctuating it with sensitivity, lacing it with humour, underlining it with detail, spiking the sad moments with the sweet, taking a cue from his ex-boss Karan Johar, and also cheekily paying a fine tribute to Hindi cinemas new master of mush.

The film also works as the most comprehensive tribute to love stories seen on screen over the years presented with contrastingly different styles. I mean watch Govinda regain his lost touch, especially when he says "Yeh Shaadi Nahin Ho Sakti" and you'll know what I mean. Nikhil confidently struts through various moods and stories with some of the best scene transitions seen in recent times, though the film does stroll around leisurely, the narrative taking its own time to unfold.

Half an hour less would've done miracles for this film and saved it from the savage criticism it is likely to generate, but for those who like mush, this overdose is just perfect for the Valentine's season.

(Just jotted down first thoughts in a hurry, will post an updated review once I watch it again at peace, minus all the public nuisance.)

Guru: Some quick thoughts

2007-01-24T04:17:00.000+05:30

I'm not going to attempt a review because I've read far too many by now and so have you.
Some quick thoughts that race through my mind after watching Guru this late in the day. Spoilers galore.

1. Mani Ratnam pays tribute to his own earlier works. How weird is that? In a lot of ways, it does look like a rehash of his scenes and techniques from his earlier films but I would credit the filmmaker with more intelligence. He has made only one film before in Hindi, a language still alien to him. And given that Dil Se bombed because of its radical ending, Mani probably decided to play it safe and stack up his best from his earlier films, all into one movie.

What do you get if Nayakan (1987) met Roja (1992), moved to Bombay (1995) and had twins, played Godfather to a terminally ill Anjali (1990, instead of spastic, he makes her a patient of multiple sclerosis), had an ideological clash that broke a friendship between Iruvar (1997) that results in the all-powerful hero challenged by a young and honest cop (Nayakan)/IAS officer (Thalapathy, 1991) and now reporter (Guru) married to someone he loves? You get a Mani Ratnam showreel. Guru is exactly that.

The storyline is just an excuse to unleash some superlative moments, especially the ones that underline the director's sensitivity in handling relationships (Guru's relationship with his old friend, the relationship between Madhavan and Vidya, the relationship between Guru and Mithun, his relationship with his father, his relationship with Vidya and his relationship with his wife): super sensitively crafted.

2. The movie introduces to mainstream Hindi cinema a genre rarely seen. The biopic. That too, a biopic of not a necessarily honest man but of an ambitious man who had a vision and won. Mani Ratnam revels in showing us the greys of his protagonist.

He marries for dowry, he has no problem bribing or evading taxes and later tells the hearing commission that he's only a product of the system that was not considerate to the poor. He only did what it took for a poor man to run a business in an environment not conducive for business.

You can't help feeling that Mani has bought into Guru's ideology and sacrificed the objectivity he maintained all through the film. But if a columnist has a right to take sides, why not a filmmaker?

3. Abhishek Bachchan, as even people who hate the movie agree, is certainly among the finest actors we have today. This is HIS film. Yes, he does deliver the role of a lifetime. I don't like Aishwarya at all, but I thought she did manage a few scenes quite well towards the end. For once, they look like a couple in love. Having said that, an actress like Rani Mukherjee would've taken the same character to new heights. The rest of the cast is first rate and never have I seen these many top class performances all in one movie.

Now@PassionForCinema.com

2007-01-23T02:27:00.000+05:30

Yay! I just got back yesterday from Dubai, after the most memorable and hectic trip ever. Was there for my best friend's Wedding. Will upload more images once I find some time. And yes, we all had the time of our lives. Lost nine days of publicity work for That Four Letter Word though. The movie is slated to release mid-February during the Valentine's season.

Didn't have much of internet access and hence couldn't moderate comments before. Sorry for the delay. Will reply soon.

Meanwhile, I recycled one of my earlier posts for PassionForCinema, a movie blog that has some super insightful posts by young filmmakers like Anurag Kashyap (Paanch, Black Friday and now No Smoking), Hansal Mehta (Dil Pe Mat Le Yaar, Chhaal and I think, even Yeh Kya Ho Raha Hai) and Suparn Verma (former rediff writer, screenwriter and director of Ek Khiladi, Ek Hasina). Movie buffs will love this space. Don't miss the stories behind the making of Satya and Dil Pe Mat Le Yaar. Enjoy.

You can find my first post to this blog here. It's about why we like some movies and don't like some.

Update: Had to part ways with PFC. I was getting a raw deal. But since I've sworn to be diplomatic, I won't get into that. :) The IIT workshop had to be cancelled too. Tell you what, this post was jinxed. The kids at Saarang fucked up. And sticking to my vow of diplomacy, I won't swear further.

TFLW: Reviews

2007-01-10T14:21:00.000+05:30

Just thought I'll start compiling reviews/opinions on the film.

"Out of the 175 films last year, the movie that impressed us the most..."
- CBFC

"Bull's Eye on debut"
- Bhama Devi Ravi, New Indian Express

"...ribald humour interspersed with some sweet moments..."
- Divya Kumar, The Hindu

"Original, bold, intelligent. Emotional without being sentimental."
- Chetan Shah, Filmmaker.

"After the first 15 minutes, I forgot I was watching a digital film..."
- Gautham, Filmmaker

"I wish I had done this movie"
- Suriya, Actor

"Very interesting cinema... Super"
- Revathy, Filmmaker-Actress

"Non-conforming to any genre, a non-narrative structure"
- Hariharan, Filmmaker and Director of L.V. Prasad Film and TV Academy

"An auteur film. Candid. Natural."
- Madhan, Film Critic and Cartoonist

"Chaos Buddha Rating: 7 on 10"
- Kausik

"This four letter word - Good"
- Sandhya

"A refreshing change"
- Nirenjan

"A sensational movie ... Must watch"
- Karthik

"A much recommended watch"
- Vimal

Do let me know when you post your review, will link it here.

The things we think but do not say - 2

2007-01-09T02:06:00.000+05:30

First, my apologies to Cameron Crowe for my version of Jerry’s Mission Statement.

I had been postponing this post for a while now and I’ve finally managed to find time to get it out of my system.

There used to be a time when this blog used to be a feel-good space. It used to be childishly wise and romantically foolish. It used to document my life, my thoughts, gyaan for people I cared for and confessions to people who cared for me.

Then, something happened.

My readership increased. And before I knew it, I began to get conscious about who was reading me and what they thought. Statcounter only aroused the curiosity further. It threw up all kind of data. Most of these people were strangers.

To be honest, it felt a little stupid posting about me and my life. It was like stripping in public with voyeurs from all around the world dropping in regularly for long, studied viewing. The thing about blogs is that all those who read you, decide they know you, just on the basis of a few random thoughts that you’ve posted when you had nothing better to do. When strangers do that, it can get quite annoying.

That’s when I decided that I can’t let myself appear vulnerable. I made a conscious effort to keep the blog free of what was really happening in my life. I even stopped updates about my movie. I decide to shift focus from my thoughts on my life to my opinions on issues and ideas. When you’re a journalist on the beat, you tend to save all your opinions for the blog because they don’t let you write that in the paper.

A year ago, I got transferred to the features section of the newspaper that devoted pages to lifestyle and entertainment. It didn’t take too much of my time and getting paid a fortune for spending five minutes a day at office (to sign the register) didn’t seem to be a bad idea at all. I had a laptop, I didn’t have to take notes anymore. I just had to browse the net, read a couple of recent interviews of the person I was scheduled to meet, and then sit across the table and hit the RECORD button on my Apple Powerbook.

Journalists just pretend that they ask different questions. They all ask the same questions. Just that they frame it differently. All questions ultimately are about the interviewees’ past, present and future projects. If that doesn’t sound significant enough, then you ask for his/her opinions and views on whatever his/her discipline is. To make yourself sound intelligent, you link it up to something that’s been in the news. Or quote them back to them from one of the two recent interviews you’ve read of theirs. Even in the remote probability that you had something different to ask, you will still get the same old quotes because most of these people you interview come prepared with readymade answers. So all you could hope for was that your interviewee would be in a mood to talk. The more he/she spoke, the better your copy.

At the end of it, all you had to do was transcribe it and email it to office. It was like blogging, only that you had to be more careful about the spelling and grammar. It didn’t seem like work.

Nor did reviews seem like work. All you had to do was watch a movie and write about your observations on how the storyteller told you a story. If you had your first movie review published when you were 17 years old, by the time you are 29, you can write one even if they woke you up in the middle of the night. This didn’t seem like work either.

I love movies. I usually pay to watch them. Why would I then complain when I got paid to?

Yes, when you write for a paper as big as the one I work for, you have to follow a certain style prescribed by the desk, especially with your reviews. You cannot get too flippant or nasty. So you use the blog to write all the unmentionables. You stop caring how they butcher your copy. After all, you have a blog to write what you really feel. So what if there are fewer readers than the paper. You still got it out of your system, right?

So I continued doing my own little thing in my own little space. I was just a guy doing my job, trying to make my movie, almost caught in a time-warp with one hurdle after another. In the free time I got, I would blog. Write about things I had done, places I had been to and movies I had seen. And of course, post links to the fun stuff I got to do – the columns. Being one of the newspaper’s youngest Special Correspondents meant I was senior enough to let people know what my opinions on movies and lifestyle were.

The section I work for is a supplement to the daily. A lot of people probably overlook the fact that this section was only a bonus. It was a little mint thrown in along with the meal. Only idiots would take the mint too seriously, ignoring the meal. There were people who were smart enough to realise that this was just a guy providing a little flavour to the mint and there were the idiots who, by virtue of spending less than what it costs to buy mint, decided that they deserved a better meal for the money spent.

Here’s the thing, morons.

A newspaper, minus the advertising revenue, would cost you as much as you need to fill a litre of fuel, every day. More than the ten times the amount you spend. It is thanks to supplements that take on the burden of ad space that you get more centimeters of news in the main section of the paper.

When I joined this newspaper in 1999, there were no ads on Page 2 of the main paper. The circulation department came up with research that showed us that our paper lacked what the young wanted to read. Their research showed that the younger generation had become so cynical of reading reports of accidents, rapes, robberies, murders and civic issues that they stayed away from the reading habit. To rekindle their interest, we positioned Page 2 as “City – Life”. The brief was simple: Focus on the bright side of life. Let’s spread happiness and cheer by devoting half a page to life.

It worked magic for the newspaper. Our circulation increased drastically. I wrote a story a day. Sometimes, two or three stories in a day. I can brag about being the youngest journalist working for my paper to have reached 1000 stories in the shortest span of time. So much that this page started generating so much revenue that we figured that we should create a separate space for such content lest it trivialised the editorial content of the main paper.

The Metro Plus section of the paper was thus born. Soon, it increased from once a week to five times a week. And that’s only because people liked the mint they got free with the meal. I spent a few more years doing hardcore journalism before I finally got my transfer and earned my chance to do what every son-of-a-bitch blogger dreams of doing – Get to write opinions on almost anything I wanted to write on. We have a readership of over four million and if you plan to count the eyeballs the website gets, you’re likely to die before you finish counting them.

Obviously, this meant I had a job every wannabe-journalist/columnist blogger wanted and still want.

I guess that’s when I became important enough to be criticised and blogged about.

Initially, I took it all too personally. Especially, since I’ve never walked away from a fight, I made sure I gave it back. I’m a Tarantino fan. When I get a chance to kick ass, I do it in style. I have near-ruined people. It was quite evil of me but no regrets. I’m human. Mistakes happen.

And then, my film happened. Finally.

I was on cloud 999.

I could see things in new light. What did I see? The ones who have always been around, still there, rock-solid as ever. They were happier than I was. Instead of sharing my life with them, I was needlessly getting carried away taking on the ones who didn’t matter.

On the eve of the release of ‘Guru,’ let me quote Gurukant Desai when he says: “When people start speaking against you, understand… you’re making progress.”

It is true. I have the perfect life.

I have a job that does not require me to work. I would pay to keep it.

I have made my movie. And I’m all set to make my next. No matter what.

I have a wonderful business partner. This year, we’re going to rock your movie, Sashi! Let’s get started on that life-changing road trip.

I have a rockstar bike that everybody seems to envy.

I have the most amazing family though I hate the fact that I’m going to have to get serious and take up a little more responsibility now that they plead old-age. My Mom’s just about touching 50 and she’s a drama queen. An adorable one at that. I’ve always had a formal relationship with Dad and for the first time all my life, I saw signs of old-age in him. He broke down wondering if I would take care of Mom after he’s gone. That shook me a little but I figured he was only reacting to what he was seeing: My frail little granny, his widowed Mom, fighting senility to be alive, just so that she can see that a couple of my young cousins wear that sacred thread. I’m sure she’s a little hurt that I discarded mine years ago. Given how loudly we have to speak to her, I was almost sure she’s deaf. I saw no point in my folks wanting to play for her, that audio clip of the Censor chief saying that TFLW is his most favourite film of 2006. But guess what?

The moment the guy mentioned my name, she turned around with an excited smile and said Congratulations. I’m glad she’ll die happy. Or at least, I hope. Her husband, my grand-dad, incidentally, died the day I started shooting my film, from scratch, for the third time.

My unit insisted I leave to Kochi, I didn’t. Today, I’m glad I didn’t. A trip to Kochi at that point would’ve shelved the film yet another time for at least nine months because the cast wasn’t going to be available. Besides, the man was already dead. What could I have done?

I had promised my best buddy and co-writer Murugan that I would finish the film no matter what. I remember him telling me he would have me run half-naked on the Marina if I ever gave up making the film.

Murugan is getting married mid-January. Machaan, thank you for telling me that you wish you had my life. He he!

I also have the most amazing girlfriend. The kind of stuff fairytales are made of. Thank you for putting up with me and my insanity. All the time.

Darshan, my soul-brother… Can’t believe I know you for less than a year. Thanks for being there, unconditionally. And, all the time.

I have an extended family in Be Positive 24. Sandeep, you are the agency’s only hope. He he! By the way, your blog rocks and don't let your partner tell you otherwise. Though I don't always approve of the fucker's confidence that borders on arrogance, I'm very proud and equally surprised of what you guys have achieved in a such a short span of time. Incredible! Having said that, Mrs. Shah, may God give you all it takes to put up with his craziness and him.

Since I’m talking about all my friends, here’s one more personal note. Sravan, if you don’t die this year, we’ll celebrate your birthday. Stop fucking drinking. It’s already on my blog. Next thing you know, your poor helpless Dad will break down, like he did when you were in that hospital bed. For his sake, stay alive.

I’m super excited about going to Dubai though I’m paying for my ticket. Thanks to my job, I’ve never had to spend on a foreign trip ever before. I’ve been on all-expenses paid trips to Singapore, Sydney, Melbourne, Seoul, Manila and our very own Goa.

So it’s going to be different this time but what is liberating is that I can afford it in the middle of what is going to be the most financially challenging month of my life, with the film slated for a commercial release next month.

With this newfound liberation, I’m going back to what blogging used to be – an extension of ourselves. It’s back to what I started with. To what was good about blogging: Just long trains of different thoughts, straight from the heart.

I totally admire what Kiruba does, even if it sometimes defies all limits of enthusiasm and sanity. He writes a web-log. Of his life and things he sees. That’s where the whole idea started.

Somewhere along the way, idiots began to infest cyberspace and changed it all. They thought having a blog made them important enough to pass judgment on others. They owe their parasitical existence to other blogs. Someday, when I feel 18 again, I might let them kiss my ass.

I was just revisiting Maddox and couldn’t help smiling. No one could’ve put it better.

Yeah, I know this is too long a post for people to read. But guess what? I’ve stopped writing for people. I’m writing for me and the people who care.

Like Jerry, I have lost the ability to bull-shit.

TFLW: Censor Board's most favourite film of 2006

2007-01-08T12:24:00.000+05:30

I grabbed this from Kumudam's Web TV site. Thank you, Vignesh, for the link. You made my day.

TFLW@Coffee?

2007-01-04T17:30:00.000+05:30

The first community screening of That Four Letter Word will be held at Coffee? (Off Greenways Road, near Music College) on Saturday, 6th January at 4.30 p.m.

All are welcome. Entry is free.

Seating is on first-come first-served basis. You will have to buy your own coffee though.

Disclaimer: The picture quality won't be all that great -- DVD projector, home video print.

Joining Zoolander!

2007-01-01T14:22:00.000+05:30

LOL!

Happy New Year folks!

Mine hasn't started on a perfect note though.

This story was written in a hurry as a replacement for the classic cliches we journalists churn out ( on new year celebrity resolutions). After a coupla boring quotes, I decided against the celeb story and wrote this one against a tight deadline.

Just my luck. Slip of mind, both these errors. Totally regret them. Truly embarrassing. Derek Zoolander, you have company! I’ll chip in too for that Centre for Kids Who Can't Read Good.

Predictably, a couple of bloggers made posts about it the first thing in the morning this year. Vetti people, I tell you. :)

That top of the world feeling!

2006-12-25T01:09:00.000+05:30

Updates:

1. The New Indian Express carried this very kind story on the movie. Thank you, Bhama! I'm yet to apply for leave for shooting 'Ullu Banana'/Watcha Gonna Do? and I hope they don't send me off on permanent leave. He he!

2. I spoke to Revathy finally.

She called me a coupla days ago and told me she had been busy and hence unable to talk to me earlier. Guess what? She liked the movie too, overall. She called it "very interesting cinema" but maintained that "it could have gone an extra mile." She was very disturbed that it did not. I asked her to tell me why she thought so. She said that she wasn't able to put a finger on it yet. She wants to watch it again.

When she heard we made it for four lakhs, she couldn't believe it. "Super," she said. "Super," still in disbelief. She, however, thought that the English we Indians speak on camera does not sound natural. And contrary to what a lot of people have said, she thought TFLW is no exception. I would like to believe the conversation is natural because four out of six of my actors speak this way (and in English) at home.

Revathy liked the treatment, the characters and she didn't like the way Sara's character graph ended. But she also noted that different people from the audience will relate to different characters and not like some of them because of who they are.

3. I got hold of some unedited footage of the premiere shot by Times Now. Waiting for the rest of the clips. Got to hunt it down from CNN-IBN, Headlines Today, SS Music and Galatta.com. Will upload the clips soon. Watch this space.

4. We are most likely to go in for an internet release by March 2007. My concern is how secure DRM really is. STAR is coming up with a broadband portal and they've promised me a secure release. My friend from STAR also suggested that it maybe a good idea to release across platforms on the same day. We're working on that idea. The other issue over internet release is that we've made a low budget film and the poor lighting shows in a couple of scenes. When you watch a low res version, you maybe put off by the technical quality. Saptarshi who saw it on DVD and in the theatre that all the scenes he thought were lit badly looked very good on the big screen.

5. Sandhya insists that this is not her just gushing about the film. I disagree. :) Thank you Sandhya!

Older post:
Finally, I find time to blog. :D

Sorry folks, I’d been away for a bit. Was a lil busy hovering around the stratosphere, with complimentary residency at cloud number 999. Now, I know what being on top of the world feels like. The word is ecstasy.

Yeah, I’m high. Without a drop of alcohol.

It’s that top-of-the-world feeling that fairytales are made of.

In the last 72 hours, we’ve done the rounds on Radio City, CNN-IBN, Headlines Today, Times Now (none of which I got to see yet much to my luck and crazy routine) and The Hindu. The premiere of my film THAT FOUR LETTER WORD happened at the Chennai International Film Festival on December 21 at the Film Chamber and I’ve been ballooning in space ever since.

Sheer joy. Absolute bliss. Nothing else matters.

It’s that feeling that makes you grin so much that you don’t even mind your face being temporarily disfigured. (Yes, this demonstrates how much say I had over that review or photograph: Absolutely none! He he! Lucky for me, my paper hates to promote its own employees and I'm happy they buried it on Page 9 where very few would've got to see that pic!)

We’ve had such an amazing response to a small, simple slice of life movie that we made at a budget of a small car.

Suriya, went on camera and told news channels that he wished he were a part of the film and would’ve loved to help out at least behind the scenes. “I would’ve liked to produce this film,” he said. When I told him not to bull-shit to me, he said he’ll tell me all that he liked about the film if I had the time. And he did. He spoke for nearly 20 minutes recalling each and every scene and moment he loved. “We can’t do these things in Tamil cinema,” he said and asked me why I chose Madhavan for the cameo and not him. Yeah, thanks to my own newspaper, the surprise cameo is no longer a surprise but I would hate it if people went to see the movie for him because he just appears for a few seconds.

Gautham Menon was at his candid best when he said the film took a lot of time to get to the point. (Not that there was any point in the first place!) He said he was hooked somewhere halfway and it did something to him. He particularly liked the last 25 minutes of the film and we had a discussion on the single-long shot scene that lasted six minutes where all we see is four guys sit by the beach and talk about their lives. He wished I had used close-ups. And I thought close-ups would’ve killed that scene. I did shoot close-ups and we tried them out on the editing table but realised the scene had maximum impact when it had the candid camera effect. Which is also why we didn’t use a score for it.

He also said: “After the first fifteen minutes, I forgot that I was watching a digital film. So I’m sure there was something in your characters and narrative that got me engaged. I could make out that your heart was in it and that you’ve made exactly the film you wanted to make. This is not a film that could’ve happened by accident.”

Gautham was the only person who did not like the editing style in the film and wished the scenes were clipped tighter.

Filmmaker Chetan Shah loved that six-minute scene that Gautham wanted close-ups for. “It puts you in the league of Oscar winning directors,” he said (of course, in jest). “That one scene alone is enough for you to get a producer for your next film,” Chetan believes. He sent me a couple of messages that read: “You have made an original bold intelligent and cinematically fine film. Loved the natural dialogue and acting. And vivid characterisation.” “Hope the non-linear narrative will find a mass audience that will appreciate your flair and sensitivity. In admiration and support – Chetan.”

Having said that, he also had a couple of areas of concerns: the originality of the music and the picture quality. Since I had sat with music director Asif when he made the music, I can vouch for his creativity. (At worst, he’s probably inspired and recreated some tune but he has certainly not ripped it off a foreign movie soundtrack).

The picture quality in a couple of scenes is a huge area of concern for us. But we hope Real Image helps us out with its expertise and tech support. They couldn’t finish Gamma correction before the premiere and I suspect that’s the reason for the high contrast.

Director Hariharan told me that it was a “very interesting film” because he couldn’t slot it under any one genre. (If I were to slot it, I’ll call it my brand of feel-good) and he thought it had a “non-narrative structure.” “I never got the feeling I was watching a movie. It was like watching real people with real problems. The dialogue was very natural and the lead actors were very fresh,” he said.

Both Chetan and Mr.Hariharan almost used the same words. They both felt that only when they saw Zebra, the larger than life character in the film, break down, that they were reminded they were watching a movie. I’m tempted to remove the background score from that scene now because ‘Evam’ Sunill is such a fine actor and the dramatic background score in that scene seems to jar with the otherwise realistic feel of the film.

Film analyst Sreedhar Pillai, however, thought that Sunil as Zebra was the pick of the actors. He didn’t like the technical quality of the film and shared Gautham’s view that the film took its time to make a point. He also noted that they felt that way maybe because they have been corrupted by the influence of commercial cinema and the manufactured pace and exaggerated melodrama.

Revathy told my friends that it was a “good start” and “interesting attempt” which makes me believe that she probably means “It sucked big-time, dude.” I haven’t got to talk to her personally but apparently she also told people that we don’t get to see films made like this and that this was a story relevant to young people around the country. Once I get to talk to her, I promise to share with you guys all the nasty things she has to say. ☺

Lensman Venket Ram said he loved the cinematography and the amateur feel actually contributed a lot of energy to the frames.

Vijay TV’s critic and cartoonist, Mr. Madhan said that it was an auteur film that was candid and natural, with very well etched out characters. He said that the film’s problem, if any, was that it was too natural. “It could’ve done with a little exaggeration,” he said. He noted that the overall technical output was better than Mumbai Express (we used the same camera as the one Kamal Hassan used for his digital movie).

He also made a critical observation that he would’ve liked it more if each scene ended with a punchline, like a stand-alone mini-movie. When we wrote the film, we did write it that way. But at the editing table, my editor Vijay Prabakaran came up with a really inventive style to boost up the pace of the slow film. We actually ended up sacrificing a lot of humour for pace but we have absolutely no regrets.

Some of my other critic friends noted that the film did not have depth. I would agree. Because we are only telling the audience as much as they will ever find out about that colourful gang of friends they find at their coffee shop or canteen. They will know who’s seeing who, what they do, what they aspire for, what they wear, how they talk, who’s the opinion leader, who’s the clown and what they ended up as. Telling a story about four friends with different dreams at the same time was a challenging task for us as first-time scriptwriters. We didn’t want to mess up trying to get overtly sentimental. As Chetan also pointed out later, “it was emotional without being sentimental.”

Also we are used to watching cinema where characters hit the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. Here in my film, the highest high is getting admission in medical school and the lowest low is not getting in. The maximum conflict and dramatic tension between friends in my film involves them saying “Screw you” to each other and then starting afresh the very next day.

Since the three important characters in the film are not the types who would sit and cry, I had to extract emotional depth from the most unlikeliest of characters: the perceived clown of the pack. As ‘Evam’ Karthik notes, Zebra only becomes “momentarily real” when he breaks down.

For the first time in the movie during that scene, we see him as human, as just one of us. We thought it was important to explore that aspect of Zebra to illustrate the only editorial point of the film: That no matter how low you feel one night, the next morning is a different day. Who knows what it has in store for you.

What Mr.Hariharan also liked about the film is that it does not take sides or preach or tell you what to do with your life. “The best part of the film is that it does not try to tell you anything. It is such a casual fun film that just breezes on, without conforming to any genre.”

A lot of my friends are proud of me, they say I can hold my head high. One of them who didn’t see the whole film because she had to leave after an hour told me she was sorry she didn’t find it exciting. Yeah, because it is not film that will excite you. It will just introduce you to people you so very well know: Yourselves. And, your friends.

‘That Four Letter Word’ won’t change your life but it will surely make you smile, every little while, as long as you are in the mood to watch without any preset notions about how cinema ought to be.

If you are looking to find faults, don’t bother coming. It’s a waste of your money. Let me tell you as it is: There are many flaws. It’s not a great film. It might be a good film if you’re in the right mood to watch some light-hearted fare. But hey, it’s not a bad film either.

One more thing. It’s NOT a comedy in the classical sense of the word. It might evoke a few chuckles here and there. But the laugh out loud variety: Nope!

Suderman rating: Five on ten.

* * *

Starting first weekend of January, we’ll have weekly community screenings at different hangouts in the city. So all of you who have wanted to watch it free, here’s your chance. Watch out for updates. We’re planning these screenings for six weeks till the film releases mid-February.

* * *

Vinod, Sandhya, Harish, Praveen and Kiruba are five bloggers I know who were at the premiere. (I'm not sure if Chandrachoodan showed up.) They all told me they've liked the movie. I'm still waiting to read what they officially have to say.

Blog about it, people, spread the word. I don't have to say: Write the good things and the bad things. Criticism is one thing I, or any of us for that matter, take only from friends and people we respect.

Want to criticise me? Earn your chance.

Finally, a word to those waiting to rip my film apart:

Thank you very much for your opinion but I've already got the only thing I always wanted. I made my movie, no matter what!

It's taken me seven years to be able to write this but what the hell... I still made my movie.

Now, how many of you pieces-of-shit can ever say that? :)

Now you know why I'm on top of the world.

TFLW premieres on December 21

2006-12-14T01:08:00.000+05:30

Well, due to limited seating, I'm not able to invite everybody for the premiere of my film. The Film Chamber auditorium (next door to Rani Seethai Hall) has a capacity of only 230 seats.

That Four Letter Word will be screened at the Film Chamber on December 21, 2006 as part of the fourth Chennai International Film Festival.

The 6.15 p.m. show is only for cast and crew, friends, VIPs and media (by invitation only).

However, the 8.15 p.m. show is for delegates of the festival. So you guys better get working on getting delegate passes soon. Here's the contact information.

All you need is a photograph and 300 bucks to choose from over 100 films from 40 countries over a span of eight days and three theatres. Pedro Almodovar's 'Volver' is the opening film (it was also the opening film at IFFI, Goa, just three weeks ago) and your 300 bucks will be worth every rupee of it for just that one film alone. I got a chance to see it at Goa. :D

And about TFLW, like I said, the Film Chamber auditorium has only 230 seats and seating is on first come first served basis.

But don't you worry, the big films are scheduled for screening at Woodlands and Woodlands Symphony.

Review: Vivah

2006-11-16T21:24:00.000+05:30

The third ring of marriage

An old joke goes:

There are three rings in a marriage -- the engagement ring, the wedding ring and suffering.

Barjatya turns it into a cruel one.

Before the nineties, Indian filmmakers successfully packaged love stories because — for the common man, falling in love and getting the girl was a mere fantasy, in a system that dictated arranged marriages.

The definitive climax was for that era of anti-establishment love stories was when the toast of the new generation, Aamir Khan, kills himself in the final frames of 'Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak'. Result: The new generation felt the angst, the old felt a little bad about love resulting in tragedy.

Around the same time, another Khan, teaming up with a certain lesser-known Barjatya, made his debut, bravely proclaiming 'Maine Pyar Kiya' and started a trend of movies that manufactured family consent for love.

This again, was the fantasy of a generation that fell in love but wished that old folkies would understand the sentiment. The new generation began its dialogue with the old on screen. The old made a sincere attempt to listen. And after a miracle (facilitated by pet pigeon/dog), love would triumph.

A few years later, with 'Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge,' the third Khan emerged at the top, after his director Aditya Chopra cracked the most acceptable compromise formula in years: Romancing the West (all through the first half) and yet coming back home to win over the family, the Hindustani way (through the second half). The new generation loved the idea. The older generation, in the wake of globalisation, let go (pretty much like Amrish Puri letting go of Kajol at the Railway station at the end of the film).

It was the ultimate fantasy: Parents sanctioning love marriages.

A decade later, love marriages became passe.

Scriptwriters began to face creative bankruptcy.

"Money? Soon, there were a spate of heist and con films.

Feeling-good? After all, society was infested with crime and negativity, you really needed a 'Munna Bhai' to reassure you that life was still beautiful and Priyadarshan to give you a handful of mindless comedy for escape.

After an overdose of crime, con, comedies and remakes, comes another experiment by the same guy who made 'Prem' (love) acceptable and loved by the family, embraced by even the traditional.

According to Sooraj Barjatya, the 'arranged marriage' (Vivah) is the fantasy.

If you like old world charm, want a crash course in the importance of family, commitment, sacrifice and togetherness in a world that's becoming increasingly self-centred, you might think Barjatya is right and may end up actually liking this movie.

If you are tired of watching evil, scheming in-laws on TV, you may actually like this movie for refreshing your memories of a bygone era.

But then, if you are the kinds who would never ever fantasise having an arranged marriage, this movie is just not for you.

The only talking point here is that Shahid Kapoor does not try to be Shah Rukh Khan.

But wait, he tries to be Salman Khan here. Now, Salman is an actor who can actually pull off delivering the flatest of lines with saintly reverence and strike a chord, thanks to the peaceful calm writ all over his face.

Shahid, however, ends up looking like a lost puppy with a dry bone in his mouth. The lines he seems to believe are literary gems lack meat.

Amrita Rao is busy wearing the 'Main Madhuri Dixit Banna Chahti Hoon' giggle all through the film and the only reaction she induces among the audience is eczema.

It is left to Anupam Kher, Alok Nath and Seema Biswas to lend credibility to the acting department in this slow and soppy film further plagued by the music and song breaks.

Having said that, at least a couple of Ravindra Jain's songs will linger in your head, whether you like them or not.

Though there are a couple of warm moments apart from the familiar Barjatya touches, the film, at best works as a throwback to a bygone era. But how many people are interested in that?

If Barjatya's 'Vivah' lasts at the box-office in spite of his uninspiring lead cast, he has senior citizens and soap-watching 'saas-bahus' to thank.

Disclaimer:
Changes in the version that made it to print are the handiwork of someone at the Desk, and in no way reflect the author's style.

Go Goa!

2006-11-11T23:48:00.000+05:30

I had a blast in Goa for 20 days, last year.

Too bad I don't have much leave this time.

But then, a trip to the International Film Festival of India held at Goa is like a pilgrimage for every movie buff.

To keep my faith, I'm taking four days off this year to hit Goa.

I hope the rest of you get to pitch tent throughout the fest.

Since not many from Madras do seem to be aware of the event, here are the FAQs:

1. Why is IFFI such a big deal?

Well, you get at least 10 days of 5 movies a day (to choose from about 25-30 of them) from all over the world (and only the best, latest critically acclaimed films) and get to watch star-studded premieres of at least half a dozen films (most of them Indian though) and in place where you are far away from work or friends. If you manage to get your friends along, well, there is nothing like it.

The festival this year begins with Pedro Almodovar's 'Volver' on November 23 and ends with Alexandro Gonsalez's Brad Pitt starrer 'Babel' on December 3.

Considering that I really loved the latter's 'Amores Perros' and '21 Grams,' I feel pretty sick that I won't be there to watch 'Babel'. Apparently, this one is about three stories from three different countries and going by his signature, is like to have another mind-boggling narrative (Gonsalez won Best Director at Cannes for this one).

Also, it's at GOA! Possibly India's best known world-class tourist destination. No matter how much time you have at hand, you still would miss out on something interesting. Goa is such an awesome place to explore.

Tip: Watch three or four movies starting at 9.30 in the morning. Keep the evenings free for sight-seeing. Do one beach/tourist attraction a day.

2. What does it take to go there?

A delegate pass. That costs WONLY 200 BUCKS!!! (INDIAN RUPEES). But make sure you register by November 15 lest they stop giving them out after being overbooked.

3. How to register?

Download the form from here. If link doesn't work, go to the IFFI homepage and try. Fill it up, get two passport size photographs (stick one and attach the other) and courier them to: The Registration Office , Directorate of Film Festivals, Siri Fort Auditorium Complex, August Kranti Marg, NEW DELHI-1100049. Before November 15.

If you read this post a little too late, try couriering the same to: The Registration Office, Directorate of Film Festivals,IFFI Camp Office, Old Goa Medical Collage Complex, Campal, Panaji, Goa. 403001

4. Where to stay and how much does it cost?

The official site has a link to the most hotels there. You can call in and block rooms. You get non-A/c rooms for Rs.400 bucks onwards and A/c. rooms for 600 onwards if book in bulk.

5. What is the easiest way to get there?

Do NOT try the air or rail. Because Panjim is 40 kilometres away from the airport and the railway station and taxis usually charge at least Rs.600 (three times the delegate fee) to get there. The easiest way and the cheapest way into Panjim/Panaji is certainly the bus.

Updated:
Most buses leave by six in the evening from Bangalore. So make sure you get to Bangalore by afternoon (take any of the morning trains from Chennai to Bangalore, Brindavan Express is a good choice since you won't need to spend too much time in Bangalore). You will reach Panjim by seven. KSRTC has some really nice buses on the route.

The train from Chennai leaves only twice a week, is likely to be overbooked and also takes longer to get there.

6. What's a good place to stay and how to go around?

Depends on what you want to do. If you want to just watch movies, stay in Panjim itself. If you will mostly be doing only movies, Panjim is a good idea. But there are no decent places to eat around Panjim. Or any nice place to hang out. Apart from the festival venues -- the INOX multiplex.

If you want to watch movies and see Goa, then you better bring some cash along. Because, it's ideal to stay in North Goa, (Candolim, Calangut, Baga, Anjuna -- take your pick) on the other side of the river to get the real feel of Goa.

Panjim is like Pondicherry, only that it's cleaner.

But the heart of Goa lies outside Panjim, in the long narrow winding roads that connect lazy little settlements along different beaches. But remember, that if stay on the other side of the river, you need to spend Rs.150 per trip to reach the festival venue. The best thing to do would be is to hire a bike (costs Rs.150-200 bucks) and fill your own fuel. It's a distance of about 13-15 kilometres from Candolim. Calangut (3kms away from Candolim), Baga (another 2 or 3 kms from Baga), Anjuna (another 3-5 kms from Baga) are all much further away and you can add Rs.25-50 per extra stop.

7. Where to party?

Club Cabana. It was about 600 bucks per person last year. Unlimited booze. 2000 plus crowd, over 50 per cent firang population. Rocking music, fireworks in the sky, the best party house in Goa, with at least three levels of dance floors and swimming pools. Saturday nights will rock. So make sure you get your ass in there.

If trance is your type, head to Anjuna. The locals will be the best guide to the trance parties and raves that happen in secret secluded beaches. Anjuna is the druggie's paradise. So even if you just look around like a lost puppy, you will find at least one peddler to ask you if need stuff. Ask them about the parties at your own risk, of course.

8. Where to shop?

The travelling evening bazaar. Last year, it was in Siolim. Ask the locals where its happening and on what day. You get the best bargains out there. And the most interesting exotic stuff. And of course, food.

9. Where do I find those churches Goa is known for?

South Goa. Most tourist attractions are a little further away from Panjim than attractions in North Goa. So for more exotic beaches, cheaper places to stay and privacy, stay down South. It is cut off from the crowd and there's a lot to explore. But then, remember it is really far off from Panjim and makes sense only if you don't plan to watch movies. Ideally, stay in Panjim and a take a day to explore South Goa. You wont get to see all of it but hey, you'll get an idea of the old-world charm and architecture.

10. Where do I find more FAQs?

Here.

Is Tamil cinema caught in a time-warp?

2006-11-07T01:09:00.000+05:30

After watching 'Dharmapuri' (a throwback to the sixties when evil landlords usurped land from the poor), 'Vallavan' (with Simbu proving he can do better than Chinni Jayanth in mimicking Rajnikant and Kamal Hassan and also following Vijay's footsteps for dance -- the little ape that he is) and 'Varalaaru' (that glorifies the male chauvinist type and of course has Ajith's attempt to pay tribute to 'Netri Kann' Rajni), I am pretty sure that Tamil Cinema is indeed is caught in a time warp.

Well, one of the reasons is probably that in Tamil Cinema, the hero is all-powerful.

The star believes and promotes himself as a Demigod. Which means that it is blasphemous for him to get abused or hit, anything he says is a punch-line, anything he does is a style-statement, a lame swagger requires a slow motion and even the stupidest poses need a circular trolley shot worshipping him.

Why have stars always tried to be Demigods?

Probably because the need for an idol/hero is deep-rooted in the Tamil psyche for centuries now. Right from the days when every little village had a giant Ayyannaar statue or their local village deity, armed with assorted weapons, the aruvals and the like, people here have been believers in idol worship.

In times of trouble, they believe the Saamy would come and save them, if they offered a small sacrifice. They believed their idol protected the good from the evil.

The need for an idol and protector is so deeply ingrained in the Tamil mind over generations, that they put anyone who they believe would come to save them, on a pedestal. They have seen kings fiercely protect their culture, erected statues for leaders who fought for their causes and even today, many believe that MGR is still alive.

For years, the man has been celebrated as the protector, the bread-winner, the hunter.

The woman has been celebrated as the protected, the bread-maker, the hunted.

The man represents the courage to protect and the woman represents the sacred chaste that needs to be protected.

These have been roles assigned to the sexes for centuries, blindly adopted by the movies too.

Literature and mythology have had a significant role to play in re-inforcing these stereotypes. Since, cinema evolved from stage and stage evolved from literature, the types sneaked into cinema right from its genesis.

Conformity and endorsements of these types has always worked with the masses. So, over the years, even if the heroine was shedding clothes, she still was essentially virgin (if raped, of course, assigned to her conqueror). Which is also probably why a married woman doesn't sell as a heroine here.

Legend has it that they built a temple for Khushboo, when she represented the stereotype.

When she broke it (probably unintentionally) by giving an interview, asking women to practice safe sex, the same people burnt her effigies.

Thanks to mythology, our stories have always revolved around love and revenge, as Rajeev Menon once told me. That’s probably one reason our themes haven’t changed.

Also, cinema reflects the collective conscious of the society. And often, of our times, said Javed Akhtar in another interview I did.

Hence, it is a very difficult task to change role stereotypes overnight because they have been deeply ingrained in the Tamil mind for centuries together.

Also, Tamil has been a closed culture, fiercely protective of their identity and literature, refusing to allow outside influences. Extremely conservative, to say the least.

Madras, however, being the capital has been more liberal. Which is why the Madras Baasai has a flavouring of multiple cultures. Over the years, an urban sensibility has evolved with global influences, television and world cinema.

With the increasing gap between the rural and urban sensibility, the needs from cinema too changed. Cinema meant different things to different people with different sensibilities. And people from different classes.

The poor wanted a savior. The messiah of the masses. The one who is always politically correct. The hero. The star. MGR, Rajnikant or Vijay.

The elite wanted an entertainer. The artiste who was willing to explore the Navarasas. The one who is willing to break the mould for the sake of art. The actor. Sivaji Ganesan, Kamal Hassan or Vikram.

The dichotomy between being a star and an actor lies in the fact that a star is built around a type and is identified by the repetition of the type whereas actors are recognised by their versatility and the non-conformity to the type.

Which means, Superman needs to wear the same costume in every comic book. James Bond needs to say, "Bond. James Bond." Shah Rukh Khan needs that half-smirk, the nervous stammer and his arms spread wide in film after film. Rajnikant needs to toss up the cigarette/ now biscuit. Simply, because, these are the superheroes. The matinee idols. The stars.

Every era had a demi-god/matinee idol. And also an actor known for his range of histrionics.

We had MGR and Sivaji rule the sixties to mid-seventies.

And for a while, we didn't have anyone because these guys were on the wrong side of 50. The directors used this opportunity to flourish. Soon, we had K.Balachander, Balu Mahendra, Mahendran, Bharathirajaa.

With just the power of radical scripts, they introduced a new bunch of actors. But the thing about adulation and fan-following is that once the devotees believe they've spotted the messiah, they believe he's the Chosen One. Post his 100th film, Sri Raghavendra, Rajnikant just took off with a halo over his head. He had claimed his place as the matinee idol.

Post his 100th film, RajaPaarvai, Kamal established himself as the actor. The classy performer. The successor to Sivaji.

With growing popularity, a star who rises mainly from B and C centres, slowly wins over the A centre audiences too, over a period of time.

Similarly, an actor who rises from A and B centres, slowly wins over the C centre audiences too, over a period of time.

The family and social dramas introduced by the likes of Balachander, Bharathirajaa, Mahendran and Balu Mahendra continued till the mid 80s and early 90s, that saw the birth of a distinctively city-centric urban sensibility with Mani Ratnam, employing the charisma of the star with 'Thalapathy' (the commander, read: the protector) after a celebrated outing with the artiste -- 'Nayakan'. (the hero, read: the actor).

The male types were reinvented, but with a touch of sophistication. Both these heroes embraced non-virgin wives in their films, legitimised to the audience as "Gangster going for prostitute" and "Gangster going for widow." Stereotypes broken. A director had arrived.

And so had cable TV. Also, video piracy.

By the mid nineties, with soap operas (essentially of the family drama genre that directors like Visu were thriving on) catching the attention of the housewife, women monopolised the TV sets. They stopped venturing out to cinema halls.

Films began to flop. Something had to be done.

Cinema, then, got defined by the people in the halls. Men.

Specifically, men from B and C centres who did not have the video player at home.

The political system too had deteriorated.

Goondas ruled the roost. The poor needed a messiah again. The elite were too busy with satellite television and VCD players.

The need for the artiste died.

The movie-goers were largely youth. And a director like Mani Ratnam had to abort the spate of his serious films he did in the nineties (Roja, Bombay) with a lighter subject in 'Alai Payuthey.'

The metrosexual hero arrived with the consumerist culture.

These spate of youth movies didn't really help the poor though.

All the poor needed to see on screen, was someone who would stand up for them and beat ten people at a time. Someone who had the balls. Someone who had the Dhil.

The simple aspiring policeman had to turn into rowdy to become the hero, in a system run by the nexus of corrupt policemen and politicians.

Earlier, there was just one city. Now there were many in the state that had an urban population of teenagers and carefree youth who couldn't spend time at home watching soap operas. What did they do for entertainment? They just chilled, checking out chicks, falling in love, following them, giving them love letters, failing in love and watching them go out with someone more urban than them.

A new type was born. The stalker. The loser. Thanks to this Ugly stereotype to add to the existing Good and Bad, the likes of Dhanush, Simbu, Ravikrishna all got a career. Selvaraghavan, as the creator of the type, had arrived.

With Rajni and Kamal on the wrong side of 50, we have once again come to that stage when directors can finally flourish.

We have a few prospects. There's Selvaraghavan, there's Gautham Menon, there's Cheran, there's Dharani and Bala. We still have Mani Ratnam.

Then why do we still have the same old plots rehashed?

Because, today, every actor who has made it big thanks to these directors now wants to be a superstar.

The star believes he's more important than the director. The star believes that to package himself as a superhero, he needs to reinforce the stereotype.

He needs to flesh out his superhero cape, come up with a handful of mannerisms and package them to the idol-worshippers. So if any director wants his dates, the director needs to sing his praise, package him as Demigod.

The stars call the shots. The star salaries are skyrocketing, increasing production costs. The bigger the budget, the safer they play.

With no other options left, directors with genuine stories turn to producers with sons nurturing celluloid dreams.

The latest prototypes, like gangsters and stalkers, are reinvented to suit the ugly young star. A good script makes it big. The one film actor starts believing he's the star. Shit happens.

Anybody with a script becomes a director. After one hit, the director signs three films in a row. He doesn't have scripts. So what? No one writes scripts. He recycles his own ideas. Sample: Hari, Perarasu, K.S.Ravikumar, Sunder C, Suresh Krissna.

What can change all this?

First, a system needs to be put in place.

Everything needs to be documented. Starting from business contracts and transactions covering every single aspect of the film business.

The process of making a film must begin from paper. From a bound script. But we don't have scriptwriters. So now, we need to create a pool of screenwriters, groom them and make them submit scripts for evaluation.

We have enough talented filmmakers. They just don't have stories to tell. Put Dharani, Gautham, Selvaraghavan, Cheran or Selvaraghavan on a panel to shortlist scripts and review scripts on the basis of the merit of the story that has to be told rather than the star playing it. Prakash Raj is doing a damn good job. Now, I just hope he begins to make money too.

The films that are radical could use lesser-known actors and be shot on Hi Definition. Using HD, a film can today be shot for less than Rs. 5 lakh (production cost alone). Real Image has 110 theatres in Tamil Nadu that can play digital content. A digital revolution is just waiting to happen. Anyone can be a filmmaker. Which is exactly how yours truly got to be one.

So yes, a professionally run studio-system and independent films are the way out of the time-warp.

(This post is loosely based on what I prepared for my panel discussion for the seminar on Tamil Cinema organised by the Symbiosis Institute of Mass Communication. My co-panelists were Khushboo, Dharani and K.Hariharan.)

When did I get so important?

2006-11-05T21:01:00.000+05:30

Hmmm!

Choodamani probably didn't expect his forum to encourage vetti/vela/jobless people this much.

Last week, there were two separate topics, both equally fanatical and holding diametrically opposing views, on one of my earlier posts.

One called me God's gift to women. I mean, that's so stupid. I'm no gift from nobody. I don't come free. I charge. And I charge big. This one's got nearly 300 votes. Even if I reduce the few times I put kalla-vote during my vetti time, it's still a big number.

The other said I deserve a stinking fart produced by college students. He he! What can I say? Someone's been doing way too much research, smelling assorted little assholes and the diverse range of farts they produce. And the post said I can't take criticism.

Oh, well, for the benefit of those who just stumbled in here, let me start from the beginning.

The criticism, in this specific case, it was an observation by Nilu about a review. An excerpt he quoted from my review minus the context.

Now, that's not criticism. It's plain rubbishing. Criticism is when you say what's wrong with it. And it is taken seriously, depending on the person saying it. Now, who is Nilu? A complete loser who has nothing to boast of but a couple of Letters to Editor published, an accomplishment any senile 80-year old reader can achieve.

If you "critics" can take a little criticism, here goes some:

Well bitches, I'm sure your Daddy would obviously kick your ass if you tried telling him how to make babies.

But hey, the one that said I deserve a fart got nearly 250 votes. That's a lot of votes. Which means a lot of people probably do believe that I can't take criticism (even if moron Nilu spent all his sleepless nights clicking on the link, something I've learnt he's quite capable of! Scroll down the page and you will find some only 40 different ISPs responsible for that many votes, which means the same people have been voting).

But yes, I will respect that criticism (that I can't take criticism) with a rejoinder.

The thing is, I do take criticism. But LIKE PRETTY MUCH ALL OF US, I take criticism ONLY from people I respect. And there's just one way to get my respect. Give respect. In other words, you can say I suck. But explain why and how I suck and do it nicely and I may listen. Or else it just sounds like you're upset with me cuz I did something to your Mamma!

These two posts alone grossed about 540 votes (each click apparently brings 3 votes).

If that wasn't enough, now I just saw two more topics here on putvote.

One, that wonders if I'm over-rated? That's already got 46 votes.

Another just got created and sent to me by a fan says I can't be ignored.

Go ahead vetti people, go vote. I'm also vetti, so I understand the sentiment. :)

Prove how much I'm worth being discussed. Waste your time.

And before you do, watch this. (Oh well, don't bother saying: It's an old trick/link. I know! Btw, thanks China!)

If you don't like it, well, like Maddox says: Eat shit!

Varalaaru: Ajith comes out of the closet

2006-11-05T03:20:00.000+05:30

Just got back after watching 'Varalaaru'.

You got to watch it. It's Oh-my-gawd-hilarious!

I didn't know Ajith could be this bad an actor. He's sooo bad that it almost looks like he's trying to spoof and THAT makes it entertaining.

The Ultimate Star is in his elements in the bits where he plays the effeminate dancer. He lives the role, revels in it, except that he can't dance to save his nuts.

Having said that, it does require some balls to actually come out of the closet and show people who you really are. (Nilu/Subash: Learn from him!)

And full points to Ajith for braving to do a role that not many heroes would've dared to do. (Vikram apparently decided against playing a similar role in 'Saandhu Pottu')

Now, if only, Ajith knew what restraint and underplaying was all about. And what's with the crying in every single scene?

I wonder what K.S.Ravikumar was smoking when he wrote this film. It's right up there in the league of 'Dude, Where's my car?'

Don't miss the punch-line for the film (God bless Mario Puzo. May his soul rest in peace) and don't leave until the end credits roll. Howlarious!

We've seen bloopers for end credits. But this one has deleted scenes that will have you laugh till your tummy hurts. It's a super spoof of the end-credits of 'Wild Things'.

Ah well, I'm still grinning. :D

On a more serious note, how the f*ck can they justify rape? (Damn my recursive hypocrisy, I shouldn't be asking this after my recent post! he he!)

In this movie, Ajith says: If you say I can't dance, I'll dance. If you say I can't sing, I'll sing. But she said I'm not 'aambale'...

The Tamil film hero used to be a farmer.

The simpleton then became the messiah of the masses. Sometimes, he was the policeman. And sometimes the vigilante. In the nineties, he became a love-stuck loser. Then he turned stalker. The Tamil film hero also became a rowdy. Thanks to Kadhal Kondain, Anniyan, Ghajini, the psychopath became the hero.

Welcome to 2006. The hero is a rapist.

Hmmmm! If only they had banned Parthipan right after Pudhiya Paathai.

How to make 'fraanship'...

2006-11-03T03:01:00.000+05:30

If you’re a part of Orkut or Hi-5 or any networking site, chances are that you would’ve come across random people wanting to make ‘fraanship’ with you or arbitrarily adding you as their friend.

Now, obviously anybody who has been in networking sites long enough would know that it just doesn’t work that way. I, for one, would surely refuse friendship requests from strangers.

Because, after the initial fancy wears off, you will find it absolutely pointless to have a crowd of over 500 friends in your list when there will only be a handful you can turn to in times of trouble. So though we are out there to socialise and network, we are choosy and picky about who we want to know.

Hawkeye recently blogged wondering why people “advertise themselves through testimonials” written by friends but refuse to add strangers as friends.

"In the 'About me' column, she writes 'Please don’t request friendship from me if you don’t know me' (this is really common in most girl's profiles). And one of her testimonials read "You don’t know what you are missing out on, if you aren’t friends with her." This is too contradictory for a person like me. Yes! I am missing out. I understand the pain of the testimonial writer in imploring me to make 'fraanship' with this girl. I'd like to help him. But I can't do anything about it."

This is a very common crib by newbies to networking sites and even seems like a valid complaint till you apply the same situation to a coffee shop or a pub or any party for that matter.

True, the people out there are surely out to socialise.

But, will any of them actually appreciate or approve if you walk up to shake hands with them and say: “I want to make ‘fraanship’ with you”?

Worse, they judge you before they even know what your name is.

Why?

Because, etiquette requires you to be introduced by someone they know.

We all know that good lookers have it easy in the real world. Some of them don’t even need a pick-up line.

So what’s different in the virtual world online?

For probably the first time, the geeks, the freaks and the nerds too have a fair chance -- The kind of guys who would never walk up to a girl in a nightclub and say ‘Hi’ just because they are afraid of the way they look; the kinds who might have a smarter line than the beefy guy out there wearing a tight tee and dances like Travolta; and of course, the funny guys who come up with the most outrageous stories and are great fun to be with.

You need not even put up their photographs, and even if you do want to, Photo editing software can transform even the most ordinary snap to an interesting picture. But then, this is something even the women do.

But putting up real pictures surely helps to let people know you are for real and are not a fictional character someone created as a prank. Statistics show that people with real photographs get more hits than people using pictures of movie stars and sports personalities.

But first, to begin with, you need a profile that’s interesting. Not too brief and not too long. Not too funny, not too serious. Not too loud, not too sober either. But most importantly, it should describe the real you. (Psst: But check with friends first, if the real you is scary, get someone to create it for you.)

Just because there are people out there with interesting profiles does not mean they are all going to be interested to be friends with you. Just like in the real world, it’s easier to network with people you have already been introduced to. Or people who are your friend’s friends. But make sure you don’t send them friendship requests before they actually show some interest in getting to know you. The boys would do well to wait for the girls to send them the request.

And unless you have a very good, original and funny pick-up line worth using, do not attempt an opening line. In fact, there are communities that promptly discuss Orkut's worst pick-up lines and you surely don't want to find your way in there.

So if you can’t straight away add friends, how do you network?

The communities are always a safe bet to find people who share your interests. Join an online discussion or start an interesting one. You will have people replying or you can always reply to discussions started by the ones you find interesting. That’s good to get introduced.

Once you’re sure they would remember you, you need an ice-breaker. This is when you can take the liberty of leaving a light-hearted comment in their scrapbook. Do not scrap them back till they reply. People do not like getting spammed. Gauging interest levels, you can decide to scrap back or network with someone else.

Whatever you do, do it with dignity.

Don’t ever beg or request to be friends with anyone.

Also, aggression might not always work. So do not ask people out till you are sure they know you well enough.

Always remember, that just because they are ready to be friends with you does not imply that they have romance in mind.

Take it slow. Relationships are defined over time.

Besides, most friendships outlast most romantic inclinations.

He says She says Episode 29 update

2006-10-29T02:25:00.000+05:30

The penultimate episode of the He Says She Says column has been uploaded. As Shonali is leaving to the UK for her Chevening scholarship this week, we are wrapping up the first season with just one more episode.

Do let us know what you want us to fight over. One last time.

Will this guy ever get laid?

2006-10-28T23:31:00.000+05:30

Having never ever met him, I had always wondered how can one person be so utterly jobless. And not just jobless, but idle to the point of visiting blogs that make him puke and quite regularly at that. After all, it's not like we have him read our blogs with a gun to his head.

I missed the chance to spit at him at the Blog Camp cuz I was out of town. I totally envied all those who had an opportunity to, even if it was over IRC.

My readers were kind enough to send me updates of a coupla sites dedicated to him (read this and this) and that's when I first got a glimpse of what the creature looked like. Good God, how was he ever gonna get laid?

We all know his real self through his puke-pot and by now, also know how worthy his life and self really is. The only thing that would've helped him score would have been a half-decent personality. But then, God decided to f*ck him over in that department too.

And then, a few weeks ago, I saw it trying to cross the road at the Anna Salai-Cenotaph Road junction. As we waited for the signal to go green, laughing at the idiot, my girlfriend and me contemplated buying a rotten egg and giving him his due. But then, we thought again.

Life was unfair. I mean he was just another mediocre guy trying hard to get everyone's attention. Even if it meant that the only way people would know him was by hating him. And there he was, crossing the road, like a balding leper, as effeminate as the girl he was walking with and looking every bit the personification of puke that he is so full of.

Oh, the girl. I doubt if he has any chance with her. Though she wasn't a looker by any standards, she was at least dressed better than him. I felt a little sorry for the chap.

Nilakantan Rajaraman would've looked like a dirty urchin with a little more hair on his head, a pedestrian you would hardly notice, and who would have imagined that this was the guy who was sitting and typing away bytes and bytes from the psych ward of juvenile delinquents just because he had access to the internet.

He doesn't have a job (I mean who would employ him without coming across the puke-pot he calls a blog).

He doesn't have a life (I haven't had the chance to blog much these days. And the day I do, I find him visiting me again).

He doesn't have a girl (Maybe it's time he came out of the closet and found himself a boy. Might help him get laid and a life subsequently.)

He doesn't have a half-decent face he can show people.

For God's sake, he doesn't even have hair to pluck on his own.

But you know what, I have to admit something here. No matter how hard we try, it is impossible for me or anybody to make an ass out of Nilu.

There's just one person who has had that pleasure. The naughty Almighty should'nt have crossed a chimpanzee with a donkey, no?

PJ: Oh yes, in case you still haven't figured that out... What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee with a donkey?

A panzy ass. Nilu, what else.

Post script: You can actually vote if you approve of this post. Else, there's another post there that says I deserve a stinking fart. Now, this is entertaining. Too bad Nilu thinks it's not funny anymore.

* * *
Updated:
Since this post has now made it to the top of Google search against his name, I thought it's only fair the world knows what goes on in Nilakantan's perverted mind and what prompted such a rude post from the usually friendly neighbourhood Suderman! :)
I started digging his archives from May because I distinctly remember some extremely twisted thoughts he posted around the last time I kicked his ass. By the time I got to July, I found at least a dozen posts. If you dig posts written by an absolutely demented soul, Nilu's blog is a goldmine. If you want to employ him or date him (both rather unlikely), take a sneak peek into his blog .
It all started when some of my friends who hadn't heard of Nilu thought I was being cruel and wicked. I wanted to show them a sample of his writing, give them a glimpse into his mind. And when I did that, it occured to one of them that we could get Nilakantan Rajaraman (author of TheMaanga.blogspot.com) arrested for pornography, especially since he's in Chennai now.
If you know legal experts, do show them these posts authored by Nilakantan Rajaraman: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11.
You may also read up on IPC Section 292 (sale, distribution, public exhibition of an obscene object), IPC Section 294 (obscene acts, songs in public place causing annoyance to public) and Section 67 of the Information Technology Act 2000 (publishing obscene information in electronic form).
Post Script: Before some wise souls come forward to argue that my blog is obscene too, I would like them to look up the dictionary for: Profanity and Pornography.

Review: Don

2006-10-27T12:41:00.000+05:30

Mission Impossible

Cast: Shah Rukh Khan, Priyanka Chopra, Boman Irani, Arjun Rampal, Om Puri, Kareena Kapoor
Director: Farhan Akhtar
Genre: Suspense Thriller
Storyline: A simpleton who resembles a drug don is sent to infiltrate the group after a police officer nabs the dreaded criminal.
Bottomline: A fine shocking tribute

"All characters in this film are ridiculous. Any resemblance to the original is purely co-incidental and unintentional."

That's what you think after watching the new Don the first time.

But for a fair assessment, Farhan Akhtar's reworking of the classic, deserves another watch. Exactly for the same reasons why you had to watch Sixth Sense the second time. You watch it again to see if the revelation in the end really made sense: To see if someone else apart from the boy actually interacts with the ghost in the film.

At the surface, Don appears to be extremely flawed, and more, once the suspense unfolds in the end.

That's because Farhan Akhtar has made huge changes to the plot, bordering on blasphemy.
When Ramayana was rewritten, the subsequent authors stuck largely to the original. Now, imagine if one of them had introduced a big twist to the tale. Like, revealing at the end of the war with Ravana, that the abduction of Sita was masterminded by Ram himself. Blasphemy, right? And it's not just about the politics of good and bad, you wonder why the war happened in the first place? It's flawed you think. But what if he had dropped hints all along the film? Things you hadn't noticed or discarded as insignificant.

'Don' shocks you to those levels, having at least two twists of that magnitude.

But then, full points to Farhan for trying.

How else are you supposed to remake a suspense thriller that almost everyone has seen? Right from scene one, you know who the bad guy is. So how is it a thriller when you remake it?
For that reason alone, it is only fair that Farhan got the liberty to toy around with the characters and deviate from the original setting.

The new Don works in a different context. He has a boss, he has internal politics to deal with, he has cops behind him, he has his professional adversaries and he has those waiting to avenge the death of their loved ones. The old Don had a bunch of loyal men at least and no boss to report to.

The new DCP De Silva (Boman Irani) is not the honest cop prototype. He's much more complex, dark and carries a secret or two.

So when DCP plants Vijay as Don back into his gang, there's more than one conspiracy in the making.

The first half of the film stays close to the original, with the new Don getting a few more smart one-liners that stay faithful to the spirit of the Chandra Barot film. It is the second half where Farhan strays far away from the original and brings in his own Hollywood-inspired twists and stunt sequences, to probably cater to a generation that's grown up on a staple of John Woo and Jerry Bruckheimer films.

The new Don is more Ethan Hunt (from the Mission Impossible franchise) than James Bond.

The old Don made his women work hard for his attention (Helen as Kamini trying to seduce Amitabh in 'Yeh Mera Dil') and the new one is only eager to seduce them (look at SRK and Kareena as Kamini). The old Don was invincible (It was not the cops who found Don, it was Don who had the DCP with a gun to his head before his death), the new one is vulnerable (here, the DCP has him with a gun to his head).

A film like Don requires able shoulders of the leading star to carry it through. Shah Rukh Khan delivers Don with much style and Vijay with the required simplicity, having a field day with all the new smart lines, sparkling with screen presence with his star badge shining all through the film. There are a lot of variations needed for the roles he plays in the new Don: the dreaded Don, the simpleton Vijay, the simpleton Vijay as Don and as the man in trouble in the end.

Towards the second half, the job becomes increasingly complex for Vijay as Don himself has a few secrets to hide. So what appears as an inconsistent performance is justified after the major revelation in the end. Which is why Don merits a second watch.

You blink and you miss something that might be significant later.

The problem with the new Don is exactly that. It is too sophisticated for the common man and too complex for the layman's understanding of good and bad. The urban sensibility, sprinkling of English one-liners, the underplayed drama and sync-sound don't seem to match the mood of the original but Farhan tries to balance that out by sticking to the modern-day equivalents of the old-school settings. Also, by trying to use as many scenes as possible that refer to the original, Farhan appears to have come up with a contrived screenplay. But on closer examination, you realise that his characters were never the same as the ones in the original and hence comparisons with the original are rendered irrelevant.

The film does have at least a couple of huge plot-holes but so did the original. Let's not forget the cheesy tightrope walk escape staged by Pran as Jasjit, the corny premise of a red diary (which could be photocopied) having all contact numbers of gang members being the most wanted commodity and the possibility of a bad guy walking around as an Interpol officer.

The tribute retains equivalents of all these: a really lame escape atop the Petronas tower with the limping Jasjit carrying a perfectly healthy kid on a roof which has the width of a corridor, a disc (the data from which can be put up even on the internet) containing bank account details and passwords of all gang members and a druglord who's infiltrated the police department to become one of its top most officers.

Priyanka Chopra surprisingly makes for a pretty decent Roma with her restrained performance, Boman Irani brings alive all the shades his character is burdened with and Arjun Rampal as Jasjit fits into Pran's shoes quite comfortably underplaying the role to match the Farhan Akhtar sensibility.

It's easy to criticise Farhan saying that masala is not his cup of chai but shouldn't a tribute be paid by who YOU really are than by trying to be someone else?

It's only when Farhan tries to be who he is not, that he fails. Like, the 'Khaike Paan Banaraswala' song tribute. It shocks you to see a fun song turn into a soulless remix. The choreography is typical Saroj Khan (a little too effeminate for SRK) and the dancers behind him, clearly dance master associates, coming up with perfectly co-ordinated stage show performance.

Music directors Shankar-Ehsaan-Loy rock their original compositions and cinematographer Mohanan ensures that the film is gorgeously shot.

The 'Main Hoon Don' song represents everything that the new Don is about. Slick, stylish, urban, metrosexual to the point of being effeminate, funny and contemporary. Now THAT is the Farhan Akhtar cinema we know.

Review: Jaan-e-Man

2006-10-27T12:38:00.000+05:30

Pop Corn-e-Man

Cast: Salman Khan, Akshay Kumar, Preity Zinta, Anupam Kher
Director: Shirish Kunder
Genre: Romance/Musical/Comedy
Storyline: A failed filmstar tries to set his ex-wife up with her geeky admirer from college to avoid paying alimony.
Bottomline: Refreshingly innovative storytelling

Remember Farah Khan's 'Main Hoon Na' and its brand of half-serious, half-spoofy, full-timepass storytelling? That was probably the birth of a new genre and sensibility. Debutant director Shirish Kunder (Farah Khan's husband) walks down the same road, with that brand of irreverence never seen before in Hindi cinema, with the exception of maybe David Dhawan and Sohail Khan films.
It is cinema that is unabashedly about light-hearted storytelling and the fun built around the storytelling process than about the story itself. That kind of cinema that often reminds you that it is a movie and hence anything is possible. The hero could be an astronaut. Or even walk up the stage during a Filmfare awards ceremony from the past, collect his award and wish the likes of Amitabh Bachchan, Rajesh Khanna and Vinod Khanna, "Better luck next time."
It is a genre flexible enough to accommodate a musical for just one segment of the film (the flashback sequence of the divorce unfolds like a Broadway musical) or a sense of cartoon-ish imagery for another. Scenes that would have usually require handkerchiefs if told from Karan Johar's camera, here, are dealt with a sense of detachment that further alienate you away from the world of the characters. It is that detachment that provides you with ample space to look at the characters objectively and even laugh at them when they are at the most tragic phases of their lives, simply because that's the feel and the mood the director is trying to create.
The most difficult and challenging part of this brand of story-telling is to move the audience even within the light mood created. Sounds impossible but Shirish does it with the ease of the veteran. But for the last half hour of the film, Jaaneman coasts along, refusing to take itself seriously.
And if it does get a wee bit sentimental towards the end, it is because we as a Hindi-fillum loving audience are so used to seeing sentimentality in our films that any product without it, seems a little incomplete.
The comic book storytelling is the hero of 'Jaaneman', for it breathes life into the most clichéd of sequences. It is indeed refreshing to see Hindi cinema in all its glory, unleashing all the sentiments and trappings associated with it, without feeling the least bit apologetic and in fact, flaunting its unique selling proposition: Kitsch. Like Main Hoon Na, Jaaneman too walks the fun line between a tribute and a spoof.
So even when Suhaan (Salman) tries setting up the geeky Champu a.k.a. Agastya Rao (Akshay Kumar) with his ex-wife in 'Kal Ho Na Ho' fashion, you don't really feel like you are watching the Karan Johar-Nikhil Advani film all over again. And that's is also because of what the actors Salman Khan and Akshay Kumar bring to the set.
Salman Khan is first-rate, no one can play the tragic guy with great comic flair better than him. He lends so much of soul and style to an otherwise light film.
Akshay Kumar, inspired by Ross (from Friends) and the geeky Eddie Murphy from Bowfinger, shows us that he’s among the best comic talent we have. He also shines in the few scenes he has to bare his soul.
Preity does not have much to do but reprise her role from ‘Kal Ho Na Ho’ and the movie belongs to the guys.
Farah Khan’s choreography contributes quite a bit to the narrative and boosts the entertainment quotient in the film.
If there’s one department where the film is weak, it is the pace towards the end. Surprisingly, given that Shirish is known to be among the best editors around. The screenplay too, could have been a little tighter.
In spite of all the cheesy jokes and cornball entertainment, a film like Jaaneman needs to be encouraged. For, its success may pave the way for more films that are made purely for popcorn entertainment and a good outing with friends.
Hindi cinema can certainly do with more of this brand of humour.

He Says She Says to end

2006-10-12T02:09:00.000+05:30

Just to inform you all that we will wind up our He Says She Says column with just two more episodes as Shonali is leaving country for four months.

I do hope we come back with a new season of episodes but then it all depends on how much you guys miss us.

Have uploaded upto Episode No. 28 on the He Says She Says blog.

If you are new to the column, you can catch up on all the old episodes from the archives.

Was Rang De our best bet?

2006-10-12T01:06:00.000+05:30

I maybe a little late to blog about our choice for the Oscars but I had been busy off late and never really found the time to put my thoughts together.

This year, Hindi cinema really seems to have come of age. Again. After nearly four decades of recycling the same old stories centred around love and revenge. And of course, family.

We had the powerful Rang De Basanti to begin the year with. One of the top 3 Khans, as mainstream as it gets in "Bollywood" (I hate the term though the Hindi film industry deserves only a tag like that), let a bunch of fresh actors share the stage with him, gracefully playing his Big Brother role in the ensemble cast. A casting triumph.

And then a breakthrough in storytelling. Two narratives, one from the past and another from the present, ran seamlessly only to merge at the most definitive conflict of our times: The youth versus the system. Since the youth of today didn't identify with rebels, the film had an in-built crash course in history to ignite a few sparks among the current generation. So it just wasn't compelling story-telling, it was persuasive storytelling.

The innovative structure provided the technicians and actors great scope to showcase their wares. The dual-narrative screenplay lent itself to smart editing, it gave the music director ample scope to compare and contrast the moods of the rebellion of two different eras and the canvas of the past and the present presented the cinematographer the opportunity to give it the feel of a classic. Hence, technically too, it is our most sound film this year.

The man who controls all these departments and holds the reins -- the director -- does that with great control. But for a moment or two when he's got carried away with the comparison between the rebels of the past and the present ... Like, the scene when Karan (Siddharth) dreams of the villains of the past morphing into the villains of the present. I really hope they snip that scene where they show an evil looking Mohan Agashe pointing towards Madhavan as his men open fire. After being shot, Madhavan looking let down asks the Defence Minister why he did that to his jacket. And suddenly the scene looks like a spoof.

That scene alone would cost us the Oscar nomination. But the journey won't be easy even if the flawed scenes and the repetition in choreography in the songs (in Khalbali, for instance, nothing happens in the narrative of the present... They are just chilling and dancing, with someone shooting it in a camera) are done away with by tighter editing.

The presence of a neutral observer, the British character in the film, gives the issue an objective look. The fact that we see the lives of these guys through her eyes works in favour of the film because the Academy members are all outsiders.

The content is extremely relevant in a world where coups are staged and power is seized and democracy is constantly under threat and the youth look West to escape. Most countries have had a struggle for independence that has stirred the passion of the youth of those times. But all that today has come history. Today's youth around the world are looking at America. They dig Hollywood, are in tune with American music, even consume the same junk food and want to get a visa to the United States. Their sense of belonging to their country or patriotism is near extinct. So the content is very relevant to the new generation of youth around the world. But the Academy unfortunately is predominantly made up of Americans. And patriotism is one thing that they have never lost touch with. They may not exactly relate to the idea of disconnect with the nation as youth of Pakistan, Sri Lanka or Thailand or South Korea do.

Selling the political content of the film to the anti-rebel Americans will be the film's biggest challege. 'Rang De' might not make it because Americans can't tell the difference between revolutionaries and terrorists. And RDB's ending has enough gunpowder to provoke them into voting against the film.

So what were our other options?

Lage Raho is no doubt the most likeable and probably the most entertaining film of the year but that merely is not enough for the Academy to hand it a nomination. It will be very difficult for Americans to appreciate our sense of drama. Munna Bhai was made for us. And we identify with the localised content and drama in it. Remember the scenes where the emotional cop wipes his tears in joy or the barber hugs his customer in delight as a reaction to Munnabhai. It is impossible to capture the spirit of Bambaiyya lingo with English subtitles and minus that, there is no Munna Bhai.

Omkara too is soaked in the richness of the native language that the subtitles will do no justice to the quality of writing. Shakespeare in Hindi might sound exotic to them, but award-worthy? Na!

Dor is a super underdog film. It is a very simple tale with great emotional quotient and feel good. But Oscars are not awards for good cinema. They are awards for outstanding cinema. Besides, Dor will no way be able to whip up publicity as much as a RDB would. UTV is one of our best film production companies and among the most experienced, second only to Yashraj Films in the country. Add Aamir Khan's already established credibility in the circle and RDB seems to be the best option we have.

But is it good enough? My guess is as good as yours.

Review: Dor

2006-10-12T00:55:00.000+05:30

Taking just a thread out of Perumazhakaalam...

Cast: Ayesha Takia, Gul Panag, Shreyas Talpade, Girish Karnad
Director: Nagesh Kukunoor
Genre: Drama
Storyline: An incident brings two diametrically opposite women from diverse backgrounds together.
Bottomline: World-class cinema.

Nagesh Kukunoor returns with his signature feel-good cinema. And nobody delivers the genre like him.

He always manages to make the world around his characters happy, brings out the larger than life element in their rather simple lives, no matter how much glycerine they had the potential for.

Any other Indian director would have made 'Iqbal' into a melodramatic 'Black,' by exploiting audience sympathy for the disabled protagonist. But Kukunoor empowers his characters with a strength and resolve that only life can provide.

And that honesty leaks through every frame of his films.

Nor surprising that Kukunoor has taken just a thread (Dor) out of the critically acclaimed Malayalam film 'Perumazhakaalam' and weaves his own tale. The plot, based on a true incident, remains the same. One woman must find another to save her husband from the gallows. She must find the widow of the man her husband has killed and seek her pardon.

'Perumazhakaalam' made this an effective tearjerker, laced with the drama of the moonsoon and incessant rains.

In 'Dor,' Kukunoor uses the premise to contrast the lives of a spirited outgoing independent Muslim woman (Zeenat) and the innocent young Hindu Rajasthani widow who lives her life behind huge doors and a black veil. And suddenly, he's broken age-old stereotypes of the Hindu woman being the independent one and the Muslim woman being the one behind the veil.
There's this one scene when the director cuts from Zeenat (Gul Panag) trying to fix her house literally from the outside, perched on a ladder, with a hammer in hand, to Meera (Ayesha Takia) inside the house and behind a veil. The play of visual metaphors throughout gives the film a world-class feel, the kind of stuff you usually see in Iranian cinema.

There's not a dull moment in 'Dor.' Ayesha is almost unrecognisable, with no make-up and she delivers the role of her career, one of the finest performances this year, sure to fetch her at least a couple of awards. Vulnerable and child-like throughout, she saves her best for the scene when she breaks down and the transition in the end is controlled, measured and believable. Ayesha handles the inherent complexities of playing a simple girl with the ease of a veteran.

Gul Panag, well-cast as Zeenat, is brilliant too, personifying resolve and spirit. She sure comes across as the woman of steel, with her body language and kohl-lined eyes speaking volumes of her talent.

The surprise packet of the film comes in the form of Behroopiya (Shreyas Talpade), the man who takes 'Dor' so faraway from the soppy, sentimental world of 'Perumazhakaalam.' He's brought in to entertain and he does like he's been doing it for generations. He's instantly likeable and fills 'Dor' with a lot of life, energy and smiles.

'Dor,' one of the finest films made on women by man, chokes you with its drama and uplifts you with its spirit. Absolutely elevating. One of the best films this year, right up there with Rang De Basanti, Lage Raho Munnabhai and Omkara.

Review: V for Vendetta

2006-10-12T00:52:00.000+05:30

V for Wicked

Cast: Natalie Portman, Hugo Weaving, John Hurt, Stephen Rea
Director: James McTeigue
Genre: Sci-fi/Fantasy/Drama
Storyline: A rebel with a mask takes on a fascist regime, the Guy Fawkes way.
Bottomline: Must-watch on DVD.

Movie-buffs, especially the Wachowski Brothers' fans, will rebel against what the local distributors have done to this movie: Tastelessly cut about one-third of the 132-minute long film. It's unfair to the vision of the filmmakers and the version to be released nearly a year after it was intended for, makes little sense in the mutilated form.

The DVD version, that runs for a little over two hours, shows you what a fine film this actually is.
Suitable only for mature audiences, this film just happened to release at the wrong time. It has released when the world sees acts of rebellion as glorified terrorism. Precisely one of the things that could go against Rang De Basanti when viewed by the members of the Academy.

But with a little open-minded approach and the in-built in-film justification that: "Artistes use lies to tell the truth while politicians tell lies to cover it," you might see the point the W Brothers are trying to make in today's volatile world where coups are staged, power is seized, minorities are witch-hunted and biological warfare is in the cans.

"People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of the people," goes the mission statement of the film that uses the superhero donning the Guy Fawkes mask as a mascot of rebellion and the voice of dissent. Though loosely based on the Alan Moore's graphic novel of the 80s, the film tries to make the setting contemporary and relevant by taking digs at America and the way news is fictionalised to back up the government.

Over 400 years after Guy Fawkes was found with 36 barrels of gunpowder in a tunnel below the Parliament, the idea returns in the form of the masked Monte Cristo who calls himself V (Hugo Weaving). V saves the meek Evey (Natalie Portman) from the corrupt cops after she breaks the curfew. And before she knows it, she's on the run, wanted by the government.

Evey represents everybody, the common man. She wants change but is scared to do anything for it.

V for Vendetta is all about the liberation of the common man to fight for freedom.

The bit about how power dictates ideology and the Western Classical Overtures set to acts of violence in a futuristic London do remind you of Stanley Kubrick's 'A Clockwork Orange' but the similarity ends there.

V for Vendetta will never be a classic in the league of Kubrick's work but it is still a very watchable film for its well-written lines delivered flawlessly by Hugo Weaving, a first-rate Natalie Portman blowing your mind with her vulnerable intensity and the slick and stylish visual effects-enhanced action sequences.

The pace does slow down in the middle indeed but the details are essential to the narrative.

Rent out the original double-disc DVD. It's cheaper than the ticket.

The last few weeks!

2006-09-25T23:09:00.000+05:30

In the last few weeks:

1. Was down with
a. Recurring flu
b. Chikungunya
c. Wisdom Toothache

2. Travelled to
a. Kochi (for cousin's wedding)
b. Bombay (to promote my film)
c. Delhi (for emigration clearance)

3. Travelling to
Manila (currently on an official trip, typing this from the Chennai airport)

4. Watched:
a. Waisa Bhi Hota Hai Part 2: Interesting, desi pulp fiction, a lil slow and flawed but works on charm. Arshad Warsi is first rate. It attempts to be different from frame one.
b. Pyaar Ke Side Effects: Surprisingly good, though inspired by Hollywood flicks from Harry met Sally to Wedding Crashers to Meet the parents to Notting Hill. But perfect for the date. The scoreboard scene still has me chuckling.
c. Dor: One of the year's Top 4 movies along with RDB, Lage Raho and Omkara. I've seen the Malayalam original and I was still bowled over by how he made a potentially melodramatic tale into a feminist statement and retaining his Life is Beautiful style of filmmaking. World class cinema.
d. Perarasu: It really felt like watching one of those MGR movies. No, seriously. One Vijayakanth itself is reason to watch. Here we have two.
e. Lage Raho Munnabhai (3 times in 2 weeks): Kya fillum banayi hai, maamu! Must watch for every Indian. I havent seen a more entertaining packaging of Gandhi's ideology. Makes it relevant, contemporary and practical in today's times.

Waiting for:
a. Darron Aronofsky's The Fountain
b. Scorcese's The Departed
c. Farhan Akhtar's Don
d. Lost 3rd season.

Review: Aap Ki Khatir

2006-08-31T02:57:00.000+05:30

The review below was NOT written by me.

I had asked my girlfriend if she could do it for me, just as a joke, of course. And guess what, she actually sent me this with the Subject: Sudhish Ki Khatir. As I get to work and type my review, here's hers.

(How I wish my paper would print this, but for the language!)

Aap Ki khatir is a result of Dharmesh's sudden urge to try his hand at comedy, coupled with inspiration from the average chick-flick "The Wedding Date".

This movie is not a let down, it is the exact crap that you expect it to be. The plot is wafer thin, and the slip-shod screenplay makes no effort to save it. While the stray educated person might have an contemptuous attitude towards the jokes in the first half, the average dumb movie goer seems to lap it up.

The shithead sitting next to me guffawed long and hard for every joke. Yes loser, I'm sure your efforts will be well appreciated by the lazy untalented cast and crew. But even the seth audience did not like the steep ride downhill that the second half of the movie made.

The film revolves around Priyanka Chopra, who is returning to London for the wedding of her step sister(Amisha Patel) to an obviously desperate and horny Suniel Shetty. Or is she going there to make her ex-boyfriend jealous by hiring Akshay Khanna to pose as her new boyfriend? I'm sorry, I wasn't really taking notes while I was undergoing the torture of actually having to watch this wannabe urban( read Hum Tum) meets marriage musical(read any Sooraj Barjatya's hash).

The rest is a love story with so many angles to it, that it actually becomes a giddy circle of deceit and drama that doesn't work, because it's roots are based on predictability. The crescendo to the climax makes you yawn, squirm in your seat and check your watch a million times.

Akshaye Khanna's sincere delivery of his lines almost wants to make you say that his acting was not bad. Almost. It was bad and overdone.

Amisha Patel's awkward hamming has been tried to hide under heavy eye make up and distractingly loud clothes. Didn't work, we noticed both and can't decide which we hated more.

Priyanka Chopra looked like a cotton candied butterfly, and tried to flit through her scenes with what was supposed to be charming effervescense. The only thought that kept running through our head every second she was on screen was "How on earth did they pick her to act in Don?!"

There's also a cleavage flaunting sex siren who has displayed the worst stomach (with post-delivery stretch marks!) on celluloid.

Dino Morea's performance is forgettable. I didn't think I could be less impressed with Suniel Shetty. I was wrong.

Lillete Dubey is her usual slutty mom self, while Anupam Kher makes an attempt to say his bad lines well.

Himmesh Reshammiya's music makes you want to make a cat howl into a tin can and compare the two.

The Punjabi Vs. Gujarati wedding gathering reminds you of its far superior execution in Kal Ho Na Ho.

In an attempt to revive the drowsy audience they've strategically placed the title in every other line. So much so that the anti-climax revolves around stale puns on it like "Baap Ki Khatir". Yes, I'll wait. Puke and come back.

Anyway, Akshay gets Priyanka, Amisha marries Suniel, Dino had had an affair with Amisha and yeah that's about it,

If you have to watch this movie, don't. If you don't have to, don't bother reading any other reviews. You've wasted enough time on it already.

Warning: this review may contain spoilers. :D

Review: Vettaiyaadu Vilayaadu

2006-08-28T03:10:00.000+05:30

Child's play

Making a trilogy or coming up with sequels is not just about repeating themes.

It is not about replaying the original plot with new actors, recycling names of characters from the previous films or casting the same actress is a similar role.

Gautham, in spite of adding a serial killer thriller feel to the regular cop flick, ends up repeating quite a bit from what he introduced to us in his first re-invention of the cop flick genre that was earlier limited to 'Aanest Raj' and scores of other Captain Vijayakanth avatars: Kaakha Kaakha.

But wait, Vettaiyaadu Vilayaadu is a pretty decent film (compared to the likes of Thimuru and such celebrated crap that comes out of Kodambakkam) but that's not what you would expect from the guy who made a reasonably well-paced police story 'Kaakha Kaakha,' which was memorable for a super tight script, a refreshingly fresh and subtle sensibility, an underplayed romance and a super cool long-haired gangster mouthing profanities.

First, where does Gautham succeed?

a. With Kamal Hassan. Gautham's done it. We see a much restrained Kamal slipping under the skin of a pretty well-etched out character in Raghavan -- the instinctive cop. A man who trusts his instincts so much that he's willing to gamble his logic and reasoning.
Never mind that one such act leads to the death of a NYPD detective who plays by-the-book, at least the character is consistent. Unlike Anbuchelvan, he talks quite a bit. Raghavan is impulsive to the point of being stupid (I mean which experienced cop would break into the house of one of the suspects without a back-up watching the door?) and lucky (towards the end, the script takes the most convenient route for the confrontation between good and evil). 'Vettaiyaadu' surely will be remembered as one of Kamal's classiest performances.

b. The cinematography. Very few cinematographers have captured New York the way Ravi Varman has. It's not the picturesque-postcards we saw in KANK and Kal Ho Na Ho. He presents NYC teeming with energy, the hustling-bustling metropolis (guess the hidden camera used sneakily due to lack of permissions actually works to the film's advantage) with the finest time-lapse and aerial shots of the Manhattan skyline. The stylised shots superbly pieced together by Antony make Vettaiyaadu one of the most technically sound movies made in this part of the world.

c. Credibility of the world it is set in. Be it characters or locations, they seem incredibly authentic. The detailing is pretty good and if at all there is any fault, it is too much of it. A whole lot of those supers telling us what time and date things happen were quite redundant.

d. Jyotika. Yet another fine performance.

Where it doesn't quite work:

a. What's with long-haired villains? Serial-killers need a strong enough trigger to become what they have. In Vettaiyaadu, he addresses the need for a reason from childhood but does not flesh it out enough. As a result, we have sketchy villains who're quite weak. Having juvenile villains does no good to a cop story where the policeman is supposed to be much more experienced than Anbuchelvan. Having 'Hannibal' posters in the room does not make them evil. To be truly evil, you need to be smart and cunning. Here, the bad guys are stupid, inconsistent and are probably confused about their sexuality. Even if they aren't, Raghavan clearly is, when he asks one of them if they are homosexual. Dude, they raped their victims! They're probably bi-sexual. We do not know. That's the problem with the villains. We do not know enough about them. They are cardboard cut-outs. The silver lining is Daniel Balaji's stylised performance bordering on hamming (which should go down well with all those who thought Vikram was brilliant flexing every single muscle on his face in Anniyan), passable for a serial killer. And his friend, lesser the said the better. He could've just worn a T-shirt that said 'I am a Uz boy' throughout and it would've made no difference to the plot.

b. The pace. Bad enough he takes his time to take us into the romantic angle of the middle-aged cop with a suicidal wreck, Gautham also unleashes upon us an item song with an all-seth bunch of dancers and models doing sethji-steps, so much that it looks like a song from some random Hindi flick dubbed in Tamil. There is no place for the intracies of romantic sub-plot or an item song in a serial-killer thriller.

c. Repetition of sub-plots. There is a distinct Kaakha Kaakha hangover throughout. Some of it might be intentional (like the song picturisation and all), but the crucial bits (like the climax -- the kidnapping of the love interest) makes you feel cheated. You walked in thinking Gautham is going to tell you a story about a much more challenging, complex case from the police files. Instead, you get a case of two extremely stupid, juvenile serial killers who are no match for a man who was once Anbuchelvan, the young cop who took on the most powerful and dangerous of gangsters almost single-handedly.

d. Fine filmmakers, unfortunately, are not compared with the rest of the mediocre bunch. Their work is compared with their own work from the past.

And when you do that, 'Vettaiyaadu' is found wanting. It suggests he's running out of ideas for character prototypes, sub-plots, character names and song picturisation.

After all, there is a difference between creating a signature and rehashing a few old ideas.

If Ram Gopal Varma made a Satya as the story of a gangster, he followed it up with a macro look of the underworld in Company and a cop's perspective in 'Ab Tak Chappan' (directed by Shimit Amin) and paid his hurried homage to Godfather in 'Sarkar'. They were all gangster films, not as good as the other but very different. They need to deviate from the central idea at least a little. After 'Kaakha Kaakha,' we already know that the loved ones of the police officer are targetted.

Something Gautham should keep in mind while coming up with the third film in the trilogy he was talking about.

Gautham, tell us more. Tell us something you haven't told us before.

He Says She Says Update

2006-08-25T03:44:00.000+05:30

I just found time to post Episodes 21 to 26 now.

Sorry about the delay, guys. It's been over a year since we started the column but we missed the anniversary.

Episode 27 should be out on Saturday.

Review: Asterix and the Vikings

2006-08-25T03:40:00.000+05:30

Genre: Animation
Directors: Stefan Fjeldmark- Jesper Moller
Cast: Paul Giamatti, Brad Garrett, Sean Austin, Evan Rachel Wood
Storyline: Asterix and Obelix are assigned to train the timid metrosexual Justforkix who is soon kidnapped by the dim-witted Vikings.
Bottomline: Credibly incredible 2D animation.

These French are crazy.

They have tastefully recreated the comic-book featuring probably the most credible-looking Gauls, originally created by Rene Goscinny and Albert Uderzo, seen on film, by getting artists to hand-draw the frames in an era of motion-control cameras and 3-D animation.

But Asterix has always been about the old-world charm. And that does surely come out in this delightful recreation of Asterix and the Normans, with the filmmakers taking the liberty to bring about a few major changes in the narrative, probably to deliver Asterix to a new generation of viewers.

In fact, Justforkix, the nephew of Vitalstatistix, could be any modern-day hip-hopping metrosexual teeny-bopper who knows the right moves for the dance floor and the means to get the girls.

Justforkix here has a bird called SMSix and also teaches everyone to party to the ``Eye of the Tiger." When it comes to machismo, however, Justforkix is Chicken Little. He's afraid of almost everything, he does not want to train and he would be happy just chilling.

Asterix and Obelix are given the task of training wuss boy. They try hard to make him a warrior but the boy is content being Celine Dion on the dance floor. There's also Abba, the rebel daughter of the chief of the Vikings, Timandahaf, who is like warrior princess Xena. And her Dad would rather see her sit at home instead of stowing away in his ship for adventure.

Opposites, they say, attract. And that's where the makers sneak in a love story.

The Vikings come across as funny too. Especially, Olaf, the stupid, beefy son of the conniving Cryptograf, who sends his son to kidnap the champion of fear, because the dumbkopfs believe that fear lends you wings (literally) and the Vikings desperately want to learn to fly. Thus, they get hold of Justforkix.

And now it is time for Asterix and his buddy Obelix to travel far and bring back Justforkix. Obelix is easily the funniest and most adorable of the lot. Asterix fans would note that the regular gags of the pirates who end up sinking their own ship and the unflinching resolve of Cacofonix to sing have been retained.

But though most of the ingredients of the comic book have been retained including the authentic feel, the weakest link in the film is Asterix himself. He doesn't have much to do this time around, except for one smart idea where he asks Obelix to throw him up so that he can see from above the clouds and make their way to find the Vikings.

Watch this to revisit one of your favourite comic books. Homecoming always feels good.

Review: Click

2006-08-25T03:31:00.000+05:30

Genre: Comedy
Director: Frank Coraci
Cast: Adam Sandler, Kate
Beckinsale, Christopher Walken, David Hasselhoff.
Storyline: Michael finds a remote to control his life. Until it takes over.
Bottomline: Yet another fun `What-if' movie.

The guys who wrote Bruce Almighty Steve Koren and Mark O'Keefe, wrote this one too.

That's also probably why Click is similar in feel and genre to the Jim Carrey flick.

But Click has all the ingredients of an Adam Sandler movie, despite the resemblance to Mr. Destiny, Bedazzled and other similar-themed comedies where the poor hero needs a break and God/Devil/Angel in a human form changes it all.

So there's Adam playing the down-on-luck guy-next-door yet again, and there's a character with whom he does not get along (if it was the old man in 50 First Dates, here it's a kid who is his neighbour), some gross animal humour and of course, his buddy Rob Schneider in yet another cameo, this time as Prince Habibu.

If there was Morgan Freeman playing God in Bruce Almighty, Michael Caine in Mr. Destiny playing Guardian Angel, here it is Christopher Walken playing a mysterious Morty (no prizes for guessing what the name hints at) who gives Michael (Adam Sandler) a remote that will help him control his life at the click of a button, pretty much like how you browse your DVD.

"The Making of Michael" feature on the remote is sure to have even the most bitter critics of the Adam Sandler sensibility break into a smile.

With Kate Beckinsale playing his loving wife and David Hasselhoff as his tough cookie boss, the film has an instantly likeable bunch of actors.

The biggest challenge in a 'What if' movie is how the director deals with the predictability in the narrative, given that it is a genre by itself.

Click has a pretty neat pace until the second half of the film where the director decides to let the drama take over to make way for greater feel-good in the climax.

It is here that the under-rated Adam Sandler (also one of the producers of the film) tries to score a few points with the critics, even donning a fat-body suit to showcase his acting prowess.

But for such minor indulgence, Click is likely to live up to its name with the Indian audience considering that we do not get much local fare in the `What-if' genre.

Review: Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna

2006-08-11T15:24:00.000+05:30

(Since the published version appeared today with major cuts, here's the writer's cut)

Slow Poison

Cast: Shah Rukh Khan, Rani Mukerji, Abhishek Bachchan, Preity Zinta, Amitabh Bachchan
Director: Karan Johar
Storyline: Dev and Maya fall in love. But wait, they are married. Not to each other.
Bottomline: Karan tries to sugarcoat a bitter-pill, manufactures slow poison.

Shyam Benegal, during the International Film Festival of India last year, observed that Indian filmmakers start out with something that caught their attention from Hollywood, and in the process of setting it in the Indian context, end up making something that has no resemblance whatsoever to the original.

KANK has a few resemblances though. If `Closer' is about two American women in London, KANK is about two Indian women in New York. KANK too begins with a literally accidental meeting and gets into the thick of drama when an angry husband asks his wife if she slept with her secret lover.

Anna: "Don't do this."
Larry: "Just answer the question! Is he good?"
Anna: "Yes."
Larry: "Better than me?"

But for these two scenes that give you a deja vu of Mike Nichols' Closer (starring Jude Law, Julia Roberts, Natalie Portman and Clive Owen) and the premise of two couples whose lives get inter-twined, the rest of KANK is a fairly original screenplay, which sees Johar take a couple of steps away from his first two melodramatic (yet effective) outings.

The sensibility in this is more restrained (it's 'Kal Ho Na Ho' more than 'Kuch Kuch Hota Hai,') as we see Johar attempting a more mature representation of adults and relationships. Though he manages to achieve that well in the key confrontation scenes, you never get a 'Closer,' realistic look at the complexity of relationships.

The trappings of the Karan Johar candy-floss fantasy genre give little room for real characters and realistic situations.

The chance encounters between the characters are so many that you will wonder if all of New York City bumps into the other, and in pairs. The predictable stock of much mush, corn and contrived situations trademarked by the Johars and Chopras makes it all the more difficult to digest..

Sample: Rhea tells Maya: "Dev ko vaapas karo" (when she's just referring to a photograph of Dev that Maya is taking with her).

Preity Zinta as Rhea and Abhishek Bachchan as Rishi are backed by well-etched out roles, come out of the film with their heads held high. While Preity breathes life even into what could have been a tough stereotype, Abhishek Bachchan in the best-written role in the film steals every frame, along with his player-father Sam (Amitabh Bachchan) introduced into the film purely for comic relief and the mandatory patriarchal advice.

Shah Rukh Khan looks appropriately tired mouthing similar lines to similar characters in similar movies. But this time, his tired, cynical look is probably intentional as the King Khan plays Dev, a bad loser in love with a self-centred school-teacher Maya (Rani Mukerji)

That Four Letter Word: O-V-E-R!

2006-07-29T01:44:00.000+05:30

Yes, a seven year old dream has finally come true. I've finished the movie. Finally!

:D

Thanks to Real Image for doing the 5.1 DTS mix, BlaaZe for doing the title rap (you can listen to the song by hitting the play button below the blog name in the box above), Vijay Prabakaran (and AgNO3) for spending countless hours on colour correction. And my sound engineer Sindhu for the foley effects and overall sound design. Well, I guess I'll postpone the overall thanksgiving for later.

This post was just to let you all know that my film is finally ready and now, it's just a matter of finding theatres equipped with digital projection systems.

Returning the favour: A few hits for the injured!

2006-07-25T14:02:00.000+05:30

The exquisite pleasure of an attack is never complete till you know how much you really hurt your victim.

Going by this outburst nearly two and a half months after the swat, guess the wound is still fresh. (Thanks Sheky for bringing this to my notice!)

Mogambo Khush Hua!